Members OldGeek Posted July 21, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 21, 2013 Very silly little question, but I was wondering for those of you who use Facebook, what do you show as your relationship status? Mine still says married, I just can't bring myself to change it but maybe it would be best as part of acceptance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ModKonnie Posted July 21, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 21, 2013 Well, I think you should leave it married until you are completely comfortable with changing it. I know lots of people who just leave it blank, regardless of their relationship status. --ModKonnie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members catz Posted July 21, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 21, 2013 mine says engaged, and im leaving it that way for now. Alex was so happy when he changed his status to engaged, and even happier when i changed mine. and im just not ready for it to change yet. When i do ill probably just leave it blank. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HeyJude Posted July 21, 2013 Author Members Report Share Posted July 21, 2013 Mine shows widowed. I also have a memorial tribute to Jerry and he is my cover photo. I still wear my wedding ring though and will always be his wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Silvergirl61 Posted July 22, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2013 I lost Dennis last August. Mine says married to him, and it will stay that way, until I feel like I want to change it, if I ever decide to. It said widowed for about a week, and i changed it back. Some of my friends take it as a sign of denial, and that's fine...they can choose to see it anyway they like. I know, better than anyone, that he's gone. I was there, I saw him fall, I was the one who frantically tried to get his heart to start beating again..and i was the one who had to watch all the efforts to save him fail, and I was the one who had to say after forty hours, that it was enough of an effort, and that i understood there was no hope...although I wanted a different answer so very badly.....and on nights like this..would love to go back and change anything, to stop this from being the truth. No matter how much i wish it was only a bad dream... I can't get my heart or my mind to just believe he's someplace else..on vacation, hang gliding in the Pacific Islands, or climbing mountains in Tibet. If other people take it as a sign of fantasy.. I'm glad they think I'm that hopelessly unrealistic. Instead of just hopeless, lost , and so very alone, without my best friend. I guess tonight...I just don't feel very strong..some days are like this one- and some are a bit brighter. It's just a page on facebook, and it's my story. You do whatever you want to about it, whenever you choose to, because only you have the right to decide what comforts you, how you feel, or what you want to do about all of this. It's your journey, your heart...and you'll know when you're ready - be it today, or fifty years from tomorrow. I'm sorry for your loss, and hope you find your way through this forest. Sometimes it can be a dark and mazelike journey, with lots of brush to crawl through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members needy Posted July 22, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2013 I have tried for awhile to get my husband's page changed to a memorial and it still hasn't happened. Is it normal for them to take so long? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members OldGeek Posted July 22, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 22, 2013 Thanks, all. I will leave it as is for now. I do still feel married, and while no other woman could ever replace Linda in my heart, and the memories will always be treasured, I am starting to feel the need to accept my situation and move forward to whatever life might have in store for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members brucealmighty Posted July 28, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 28, 2013 Not silly at all. It looks like you've already gotten the help you need on this one, but I say keep that status as is. You'll know when the right time to change it will be. Nothing wrong with it at all, and your facebook family should respect that it is your decision to decide when you are ready to do so. It makes me feel closer to the person I lost to leave my status as is, and I don't plan on changing it any time soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members OldGeek Posted July 30, 2013 Members Report Share Posted July 30, 2013 I did decide to make the status change 2 days ago, and thankfully this is one status change that Facebook does not broadcast. It wasn't as hard as I thought, and I don't think anybody has noticed it. The interesting thing is that there is no appropriate category to select for my connection to Linda's Facebook profile, other than family member.I have been making changes like this when the time strikes me as being right, although I can't identify what that trigger is. Baby steps on my journey to whatever new normal awaits me. Doesn't make the actions any easier, but I do feel they it help me gradually accept the situation I have, since I can't have what I want.I can't imagine experiencing anything tougher in life than losing Linda, and I thought I had faced a lot of hard times in life. This forum is helpful, bless you all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guests Guest Posted August 2, 2013 Guests Report Share Posted August 2, 2013 I will change my FB status when I remove my wedding band. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Karen.Lyn Posted August 21, 2013 Members Report Share Posted August 21, 2013 I changed my status to widowed but in my heart I will always be his wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members OldGeek Posted August 21, 2013 Members Report Share Posted August 21, 2013 I changed my status to widowed but in my heart I will always be his wife.It's a hard thing to do, and a very personal choice with no right or wrong to it. I am making a specific effort to live in the present and move forward to a new normal, this was one of the steps on the journey, many more miles to go with lots of detours and switchbacks still ahead I'm sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HeyJude Posted August 21, 2013 Author Members Report Share Posted August 21, 2013 That is how I feel. I will be his wife until I die.I changed my status to widowed but in my heart I will always be his wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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