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cvaughan598

ADC's, Visions & Dreams

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Hi everyone.

For Laura: since your husband's presence is so strong ...why not ask him to help get your dad to come through? They have been hooked up together already in some way from the sounds of things in your previous postings. There must a reason for that. Why not go with flow of that and see where that leads you? Just some food for thought.

For Swede1: Thank-you for your kind words : ) I'm glad to hear that furboy said hello! That's great!!

For everyone: Remember to keep trusting in what you feel.

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Hi everyone.Haven\'t been here to post;I feel like someone has pushed a \'pause\' button and I am impressed \'to be\' rather than \'to act\'.Kind of like riding a wave in a wake.Not devastating,just going with the flow.Don\'t really know what it means,however as seekingsolace says I am trusting what I feel.All things[ADC\'s] in its time.Hope all are doing well.

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Seeking Solace,

I am new to this site and you seem to know things that I am curious about. I just typed two paragraphs and hit the spacebar and it got erased somehow! Maybe I am not supposed to be asking these questions, but I am going to try again.

My brother died in Feb, I was called to his house and saw him laid out on his back. I had a horrible feeling. At the funeral and funeral home when he was in his casket, I felt like he was still in his body even though I have always believed that your soul leaves your body at death. When I grabbed his arm I felt he was there. I have had some strange signs in my bedroom at night when the lights are out. Loud cracks as if someone stepped on a plastic hanger and broke it or at first I thought maybe the window was settling but I can't figure out a good explanation and I wondered if it was from my brother...but if so why would he do something that is so scary? I have actually been woken up by this crack 3 or four times in one night. My brother was so loving, and kind. He worked hard and he was very smart. I am sure he would figure out a better, nicer way to contact me. I just wonder if the cracks could be from some bad entity and not my brother because my son heard it too and it creeps us out.

Thank you for being here on this sight. I have enjoyed reading your posts and admire your gift.

Laura

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Hi Laura [Lauraanne].

The things that you sensed are significant. But, in order to sort out, exactly what it means, I need more information about your brother and what's happening. [if any of what I am about to ask you is too personal, please know that you can always e me privately at illuminatumm@hotmail.com. But, if you do have comfort with posting here publicly, I am quite certain that others reading our postings can also benefit from the knowledge.]

Ok. Here are the questions:

- How did your brother die?

- How did you receive news of his death?

- What was happening on the day that his body was laid out?

- What was the relationship between you and your brother like?

- Please tell me more about his character/personality and what kinds of things he was involved with in his life

- When you heard the cracks that woke you up, aside from being startled, how else did you feel? [and how did your son feel? ...You mentioned being creeped out ...can you elaborate more? ..and can I ask how old your son is? and who heard it the sound first?]

- Have you ever wondered about the presence of bad entities before in your life? Or has any member of your family ever mentioned this?

- What is your spiritual life like? and your brothers? [in terms of your relationship with a Higher Power/Big Kahuna? ...i.e. outside of a religious context ...This question is only about personal relationship 1:1]

I must apologize for the long string of questions. I tend to get down the fine detail of things when looking for clear answers. Answer as few or as many questions as you feel comfortable to [here or privately]. If you don't feel comfortable answering any of these questions, that's understandable too ...We can opt to my just sending you information on how to request more peaceful signs instead [but I thought we could start with sorting out what is happening first]. Have you spoken to your brother directly since his death and made that request already?

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WoW! I Haven't been to this forum for a few months! Until now, I have simply read your stories. My first ADC was a vivid dream I had over 10 years ago about my dead grandma. I knew then I had experienced something special, but didn't want to sound crazy, so I kept it low key to others. I felt her visit in a dream, and had later confirmation of her visit with numbers. My mom died 5 years ago, and my dad died over a year ago. When my mom died, I told God/ higher power that I needed to KNOW where she was. 2 weeks later, my daughter saw her outside. I was too scared to go out back where she was, but knew I was getting answers right then. So I retraced my daughter's steps, paused, and found a near dead baby rabbit by my feet. While this was happening, I goot alot of "feelings/answers, which I cant remember now, because I felt like I was being answered in another realm, hard to comprehend in this world. I went inside KNOWING that we all do go on after death, deciding I could wait until then for more answers. Over the next few years, when we ould visit, my daughter would experience vivid dreams and noises about her. Apparently my dad would see her, too. The night my dad died, I was given the gift of a dream from him, which answered questions for me. Over the past year, I have had several "answering dreams", and signs in the form of songs and numbers on special occasions---my birthday, Christmas, etc. These are the best gifts I've ever experienced. Once, before falling asleep, I asked if I could just hold my dad's hand one more time. In my dreams, I did, and it felt so real. Lately, I feel almost "distanced" from this realm, but still got a sign. I watched the last episode of NYPD Blue, my dad's favorite show. I was crying, wanting comfort. 10 minutes into the show, the phone rang once, and the caller ID showed the last 4 digits to be our old phone number. We don't know anyone with that exact number. I just want to say thank you one and all, for helping me feel " normal".

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Hi everyone.

Welcome Noidofmyown : ) And thank-you for sharing your incredible experiences with us. I think you already know that those "dreams" were actually "visits". It is so incredible to be able to feel your father's hand again! And the phone number trick that he was able to do ...very precise communication. Some people in spirit have quite a knack for electronics. With my grandfather it has been the same since he passed to spirit. He once came on the phone line in "conference call" fashion when my grandmother was on the phone to her friend and said my grandmother's first name twice ...They both heard his voice clearly. The other woman said .."Is that ___?" [she recognized his voice]. It was quite a moment for both of them.

How is everyone else doing these days? I know, with today being Father's day, that it's probably not the easiest day for many of you. Know that my heart goes out to you ...

Laura [Lauraa]: have you had any movement in hearing from your dad yet?

Sunflowers: Good to hear that you are just being in the moment.

Remember to keep trusting what you feel.

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lauraa   

Seekingsolace,

I was freaked out when I read the other Laura's post. Because before I read her post to you I read you reply to her...My name is Lauraanne and I had a brother who passed and I thought how in the world did you know all that and then I read the other Laura's post. Anyway, no luck yet with my dad coming thru. I do ask both my husband and my dad to come and visit with me but no luck. I want to see them. I am listening to a tape to meditate to help facilitate them to come thru but I seem to get emotional at that point in the tape and I'm always teary. Any suggestion. I truely appreciate all your care and thoughtful in teaching me and others to master this special ability.

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Hi Laura [Lauraa].

You poor thing : ( No wonder you were freaked out. The similarities between your story and that of Lauraanne's are uncanny from what you were saying.

When is the last time you heard from your husband and your dad? Can I ask how [in what manner] they said hello to you most recently? And how they have said hello to you prior to that? [i'm just trying to isolate their preferred methods of communication]. I believe you mentioned previously that, when you closed your eyes, you could see your husband's face and a silhouette of your dad. Is that still happening? Have you asked your husband to try to help in bringing your dad through? Have you spoken to your dad directly about ways in which you are ok with him coming through and set aside a specific time each day for him to say hello? [i know ...a LOT of questions ... I know there is a way to get this happening for you two ...We just have to sort out what is interfering with communication]

It sounds like you have been working very hard with your meditation tape. How have you been feeling when it is on? [you had mentioned getting teary when you ask them to come through]. If you feel the tears come on. That's ok. Just let them come. Cry and talk to them at the same time. Just keep talking while you are crying ...as best you can.

Would you be able to tell me what exact words you are using to ask your dad [and husband] to say hello? [sometimes the words can make a big difference]

Knowing more about your dad would help too: what his skillset was like while he was physically on earth [ie. was he a clear communicator? or communication challenged? was he open with his feelings? or closed? was he a handyman? good with electronics? into computers? ...Some of his skillset and/or areas of interest will help me sort out how he might opt to communicate with you in terms of what he might be drawn to and what might be easiest for him these days. Was he interested in plants? gardening? birds? photography? Do tell me more if you feel like it.

Here's a long shot but I'll mention it anyways: sometimes, if there is unfinished business on the earth with someone, then later communication with them in spirit can be affected [temporarily] because the unresolved issue is still held in the earth's person's heart. I'm not sure if this was the case for you and your dad but I just thought I would mention that for contemplation as well.

There IS an answer here. Let's see what we can sort out. I am here if you would like to look into this more and try to find a solution.

Take care.

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swede1   

Noidofmyown,

Oh my goodness -- I'm so ENVIOUS of you! That phone trick was WONDERFUL and I'd give anything to have something like that happen to me, too! So far, even though it's been over a year since my Mother died, and also over a year since my father sold their house and got placed in a home, I still can't even bring myself to erase their phone number from my on-phone directory....and had actually been HOPING somehow that it would ring one fine day and I'd see my Mom's number displayed and hear her, at least briefly, on the other end....but it never happened. Since my last (good) visit from her in a dream, I haven't had squat, and it's breaking my heart. It seems like maybe she didn't love me as much as my furboy did (who's given me MANY signs and always seems to show up when I REALLY miss him). I also had many signs through numbers, at least from my furboy - he constantly sends me his age when he passed...what a guy! It's "13", a symbolic link to his feline colour (black), so now Friday the 13th's are very special days in my mind. I've also heard tell of many folks who have actually SEEN loved ones (both human and otherwise)quite solidly, sometimes seen instead by OTHER people instead and then reported or asked about (even by those who didn't even know the loved one was gone)...and again, I'd give my eye teeth to have this happen to me, but it just hasn't. I always wonder (how could you NOT?) why it is that some people are what I would consider LUCKIER than others in this respect...what are they doing differently than the rest of us who need and want the same experiences? If you have any more experiences to share about these, I'd love to hear about them, despite any jealousy I have!! (and as a P.S., if Seekingsolace has any light to shed on these questions as well, please do!) We're all so very thirsty it seems and can't seem to drink our fill of these visitations/verifications. You're also very fortunate to have come away at least once with a sense (or 'KNOWING') of continuing life after physical death...another thing I've been drooling after. Can I ask you if you still carry that with you &/or can recall at will what that felt like, to lift yourself up with when needed? Hoping to hear back from you,

Swede1

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lauraa   

Seekingsolace,

About 2 weeks ago I was lying in my bed in the morning with my eyes closed and my husband came thru very vividly. It was almost like it was real. I was thinking I was sitting in my back yard where my perennial garden is (where I am alot to relax)and where there are alot of birds and peace and quier...and while my eyes were closed it was like my husband was walking toward me in a bright sunshine toward me...he was smiling and seemed extremely happy. The brightness was intense and it felt real as if he was still alive...then I opened my eyes. The is a Spiritual Church I attend sporaticly and every time I go there I always ask my husband to come and see me and every single time a get a reading from a medium and they all say he is with me and he loves me, etc...and that my energy summons him there to be with me. Also, I think when I ask him he does come thru. Yes, When I close my eyes I still see my husbands face and my dads silouhette. I have asked my dad to come thru but nothing yet. I have not been specific as to time but I do sit in my back yard which is where he loved to sit when he visited me because he love nature so much and we would watch the birds and flowers and have coffee together, etc. No, my father was not mechanical with electronics, etc. but he was interested in nature, art and things of that nature. He was a cake decorator and could make icing roses look real. I have had dreams of my husband. One in particular early on he was with me in a dream and we were standing together at his funeral looking at his casket and he told me "I'm not there". I thought that was significant. When I listen to the relaxation tape and I get to the part where I ask my loved ones to come thru it is emotional for me as I want it so much. The last time I did ask my husband to help get my dad to come thru without any luck. When I sit in my back yard I ask my dad to come see me. He actually did come to his sister soon after he crossed over. I really want to see them both. I'm all ears if you have any suggestions. Thanks for writing.

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Hi everyone.

For Laura [Lauraa]: I remember that incredible visit from your husband that you had 2 weeks ago. It was indeed real. You were relaxed and he was able to come to you. I remember that dream of your husband as well. It is good to hear that you are still able to see your husband's face when you close your eyes and your father's silhouette. Good : ) A sign to you from them that they are right there. They ARE making contact with you [even if it's not as extensive as you would like just yet]

Sitting in the backyard, in nature ..where you're father is comfortable ...makes sense as far as him contacting you there. But he also might choose to do it somewhere else. It all depends on his ability to send out a signal in a given moment and your ability to notice it.

I would suggest setting aside a period of time each day that is 'dad time' and just sitting with your eyes closed for 1/2 the time and open for the other 1/2 [whereever you like ...just a place that you won't be interrupted] and listening in ...trying to clear your mind as much as possible. I would suggest starting to do this at least 15min per day at the same time each day and let him know that you are doing so. It would be quite helpful to have something on hand from your father when you do this [like a picture, a cake decorating tool, or something special to him] ...It will help prime your frequency to his and also send out a signal to him. During this time, you need to ask your husband to give you 15min alone with your father. Don't worry ..your husband will come back ...Just specify to come back when you are done with your 'dad time'.

During this daily time, you can close your eyes for a period and focus in on your father's silhouette ..Speak to it as you ask questions. Do let your dad know that you finding it challenging hearing from him and any suggestions he has for you to assist with this would help ..no matter how he gets it to you.

Another approach is to give your father a one-time time-frame for starters; i.e. "dad ..I would like a sign from you sometime in the next 24h/2d/3d" and then watch for it. Specify during the day so you don't miss it when you are sleeping.

For Swede1: you had asked why some people get a lot of signs and others might not get as many. A number of reasons: reception depends on the receiver's ability to note subtleties and the sender's ability to transmit the message. Once the "receiver" gets the knack of seeing signs, they often are noted more readily ..The signs were there all along ..They just get missed. The "sender" will have skill set to send messages/signs depending on what their strengths are [ie. just like on earth ..If a person is good at concentration, maybe they will come through telepathically or in the dreamworld; if a person is good with electronics ..maybe they say hello through the phone, TV or other mechanical device]. The sender is often quite challenged because it's often hard to get our attention down here.

The wiring of our nervous system makes a difference as well. Some people have more sensitized wiring than others so they tend to get signs more easily. But we all have the ability. It's really just a matter of sorting out how to do it and practice [and clearing any blocks]

Hope this helps everyone a little bit today : )

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lauraa   

Seekingsolice,

Thanks again! How would you explain my dad showing up at his sisters house after he passed...she wasn't asking or looking for him. She was in her bathroom looking in the mirror and she looked to the doorway and there was my dad. He then went sat on her bed and she grabbed his hand and kissed as she always did. She said he felt real and looked alive like he always was. My dad said he had to get a message to one of my brothers and then he disappeared. It was real. But, she was not looking for it. Do you think her barriers were down and it was earier and less dense of energy for him to get to her???? I have wondered that alot. My dad and I were extremely close and I have often wonder why he went to his sister and not me...although, they were close too. I think I was so profoundly grieving the loss of my husband that he probally couldn't get to me????? Thank you and look forward to hearing from you.

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Hi Laura [Lauraa]

I think you are bang on : ) Your grieving for your husband would have made it harder for your dad to reach you. It was just easier for him to get through to his sister. I have no doubt that he HAS been trying to reach you though. I think you feel it too ...You just haven't had the confirmation [beyond the silhouette] that you seek yet. But it WILL come.

Happy to help : )

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swede1   

Dear Seekingsolace,

A few more questions, if you would be so kind...first, re: communication: If someone\'s style of communication was rather dysfunctional, how might they come through then? Also, I\'ve been confused about another related thing. John Edward used to say that people/animals retain their basic personalities even after crossing over, yet at the same time they aren\'t the same, ie. they don\'t have the same hang-ups, etc. This sounds like a contradiction to me. And if everything is so loving, whole and wonderful \'there\', how is it that they\'re STILL having to work on their \'problems\'?

Also, you\'ve mentioned several times that they can come through easier if we\'re not so distressed....and yet, I\'ve found that I got the MOST and the BIGGEST, CLEAREST signs exactly when I was grieving the hardest...plus, because I was so upset each time, I didn\'t follow any prescribed method other than to put my heart into each plea that they come to me in some way. How do you explain this dichotomy?

And, do you think my cat could just as easily help my Mother and brother come through just as easily as a human energy could? What if my Mother didn\'t relate to cats very well in this world - would that make any difference now?

Do you know anything about reincarnation or changing physical forms from one species to another?

Are you getting \'questioned - out\' yet?! :} LOL!

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First to Lauraa,

I find it interesting that we have the same name and actually use the same user name too and now you say there were similarities in our brother stories. (My email address starts lauraa@ so imagine my suprise to see my user name on this board!) I miss my brother very much. I was wondering if you ever had any contact with your brother since you have only mentioned your husband and dad. If you don't want to talk about it, then forgive me for asking and I understand.

For Seekingsolace,

Thank you so much for your help. After reading some of these other posts I feel like I may be able to share some more of my experiences although the pain from my brother's death being so new and unfinished so to speak, I may not say as much about that here. I did feel his presence the other day and I haven't been able to calm down enough,(very busy), to do it again. It is so hard for me to relax. But I am going to try again soon.

I have an experience that I want to share with everyone. It happened about 6 or 7 years ago. I was married then, and was awakened by the unusually loud doorbell. I shook my husband and told him to go see who it was at around 2:30 in the morning! He didn't hear it but finally went and looked...nobody. So I was just dozing back off to sleep and again the doorbell. He didn't hear it and wouldn't go to the door. This happened about 3 times and then the next time I woke up I had been having a terrible dream about a man with blood running down his face. To make this shorter, an old boyfriend who used to get readings all the time and told me that sometimes people from the other side use doorbells to contact us, had died around that same time, that same night. I believe it was him. Since that time I have had the doorbell phenomena happen several times but I never know what to do when it happens.

The only other thing that has happened to me that I believe was contact from a loved one was in my teen years I was going through some rough times. My dad died before I was born and I dreamed that we were walking on a dock/pier and he had his arm around me and told me that everything was going to be alright. He looked just like the old 8mm movies I had seen of him even though I had never met him.

That's all for now,

Laura

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Swede 1 What I can tell you is this. The first time I made contact in my life was from my Grandma. She had been dead several years. The dream was very vivid, and I felt her presence when I woke. I also got the feeling that for some reason she couldn't contact me earlier. I feel now like signs of loved ones are there. If I had not had that experience with my grandma, I don't think I would have been ready now. One message that has come through for me from both my parents is that my 16 year old daughter is very special. Not only because she saw my mom, but 6 months before my dad died, we visited him when he was in a coma. When my daughter spoke to him, he grabbed her hand and stroked it. He had no recollection of this when he came out of the coma, but the message was loud and clear for me. I think accepting that she has a connection helped me to accept that others can have connections. My sister was jealous after my mom died --- but she was waiting for a clear sign. After my dad died, she is more open to signs---she smelled my dad several times while she was trying to ready the house for sale. During this time , I had a dream in which she told me that her 3 year old son "talks to papa". I worded my dream carefully to her, as I didn't know if she would believe me. She was surprised, but told me that her 3 year old son does "talk to papa". I then said' You know what else that means --- papa talks to your son." Sometimes I think its easier for children to accept this --- we get caought up in logcal explanations. I think over time, through my own children, I am becoming more accepting of this. I haven't been able to make these things happen --- but they happen when I seem to need them the most. Seekingsolace, can you explain this? It is only now in my life that I have come to accept these things without the fear of being labeled "crazy".When I have told others about these things, I find more people than not have had an experience or know someone who has had a similar experience. My sister told me that her husband had a dream about my dad. His parents are both dead, and he hasn't had an experience like this about them. In his dream, my dad told him he had been in a dark place and couldn't breathe, but he's okay now. He died of empysema. As far as the "dark place", I wasn't as worried. In life, my mom was a spiritual person, while my dad was the practical one. Is it that he needs more time to work on this? His death seemed very spiritual to me. We were all there--- kind of like the expectant family awaiting a birth, but we were awaiting his death. Also, I was the one holding my grandmother's hand when she died, but I didn't realize it was her last breath. I had visited my mom 4 days before she died, and she, too died surrounded by family.

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Hi everyone.

Lots of stuff to try to answer I see. So let me get right to it : )

For Laura [lauraanne]: Thanks for your kind words. I'm happy to help. I'm glad that you're feeling more comfortable with sharing. The doorbell visitor sounds like they were certainly very persistent. They really wanted to get your attention. It does make sense that it would be your old boyfriend. You might want to just ask him to tell you what he would like you to know and specify that you would like to have communication during the day and even specify which day and timeframe. 230a is a bit of a mess for sleep afterall : ( You could also wait until it happens again and then speak to him at that time but I would value my sleep too much to risk that happening again.

The dream about your dad was most likely a visit from the sounds of things. How did you feel in the dream? That is the key to discerning a visit. Visits [in dreams] are usually linear dreams [as opposed to the abstract way that dreams can sometimes be] or at the very least a very clear, linear, non-abstract moment in a dream AND the person visiting feels very real to you in the dream. That is an example of a visit.

For noidofmyown: you had said that you can't seem to make [contacts/communications] happen ... yet when you most need it, they just happen ...and you had wondered why this was. Other Side communication is facilitated by the receiver's ability to receive. Part of this is being very open to receive in a given moment, part of this is being clear that you would like to receive in a given moment and not have any fear around it happening. Maybe when you most need the contact from your people on the Other Side is when you are being the most clear.

I know this might sound odd but clarity is an alignment process: conscious mind + subconscious mind + emotions + body. These all have to be in sync/ saying the same thing / having the same intention otherwise you can send a mixed signal out there and then people on the Other Side don't know what to do. If one part of you says "yes ..I would like contact" and the other part hesitates for some reason ...it's confusing for the senders and it messes up the "receivers" signal [ability to receive]

Every person has a different manner in which they get clear ..For people that tend to live more in their logical mind, the moments of greatest "heart" clarity are usually when they are feeling an emotion strongly. For people that live in their emotions, when they are feeling an emotion, their pain can be so great that it mucks up the signal to the Other Side [this is quite common]. These more emotional people receive signals more easily when they are calmer and meditative. There is a frequency to the Other Side regardless and it needs to be matched to get the signals.

Oh yes ..one other thing ...The dream that your sister's husband had about your dad ..I believe the "dark place" that your father spoke of where he "couldn't breathe" was when he was on earth with emphysema. And when he says he is ok now I believe he is referring to the Other Side.

For Swede1: You had asked about why people come through to you when you are feeling distress and ask with your heart when I have previously mentioned that pain often blocks the transmission. See 2 paragraphs above this re my note to noidofmyown re Logical people vs emotional people. Does this clarify things at all in your case?

You had also asked what would happen if someone's style of communication was dysfunctional. Do you mean the senders? [ie. person on the Other Side] or the receivers? [person on earth]. Once I know this, I can answer.

Yes a cat can definitely help someone come through just as much as a human can. Animals have souls just as we do. While on earth, I feel them to be more open and aware than we are for the most part. They easily see and hear the spirit world. When they pass to the Other Side, I have often found that they are very wise souls. You can usually already get a sense of the wisdom and age of their soul when they are on the earth [just by looking into their eyes as you sit in front of them ...Just sit for a while and feel them].

What John Edwards said I have also found to be true. But I would word it a bit differently: people retain their "soul personality" when they cross. This personality does not have the same hang ups they had on earth. It would be analagous to a person on earth who has become enlightened. Does that make some sense? If you are still unclear, let me know and I can elaborate more.

Lots of text again ...Apologies for going on and on.

Remember that they ARE with you. The signs are there ..Trust in that.

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lauraa   

Lauraanne,

That's is so funny to me writing that....maybe it means something that we both are here with similiar names and circumstances. I am so sorry about your loss of your brother, My brother "passed" many, many years ago in a house fire and it was extremely tragic and sudden. He was 5 years old and I was 10. Iit shaped my life. Last year I lost both my parents and husband within 6 months of each other. It has been a struggle. Mostly I'm dealing with not being able to sleep and anxiety. I cried solidly for the first year. My heart was broken and a piece of me is missing. I know my husband is still with me in spirit but physically I can't have him and it is horrible to deal with. I know everyone on the outside thinks I'm better and moving on but the truth is I feel hollow inside and my zest for life is gone. I move forward for my kids and they are my priority...along with me keeping my health. I try to make sleeping at night a priority even if I take something to help, otherwise I go to bed exhausted and wake up just as tired. Everyday is an adventure. I never know what each day will bring and what circumstance will upset me. ie. Yesterday I had a doctors appt. in the facility where I had my babies and all the memories of that and my husband came flooding thru....Needless to say I cried all the way home. Everything seems so trivial compared to this loss. It is earth shattering for me but life around me goes on. It is so painful and extremely lonely. Everyone leaves after the funeral which is the hardest thing to understand...do people really think we don't need help now more than ever? People say I haven't called because I know how busy you are? Ya, but a call wouldn't hurt or a visit. People don't want to look at the dark side of things in life. Maybe they think if they talk about it then it could happen to them??? The stages of grief are a trial in itself...a real rollercoaster of a ride. I keep asking god what did I do to deserve loosing my husband and what did he do that was so bad to deserve to suffer like he did? What do I need to learn from such a loss? Any suggestions? Thanks for listening and I will keep you along with everyone else on these sites in my daily thoughts and prayers.

Seekingsolace,

Do you have any special books or any other things that could help with all the stuff we have talked about? I'm not sure if you emailed me or not?

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Hi Laura [Lauraa]:

My heart goes out to you. Only you know what you feel right now but, the way you describe it, is almost tangible for me. My heart physically hurts as I write this.

I don't know of any books that cover the items I have spoken about. It's not that they are not out there ...I'm sure there must be some [as there are a lot of books on the market] ...it's just that I don't know of them. I get my information direct from the Other Side. From your request though, perhaps I should consider writing something for people. I am a hands on one-to-one gal so I prefer interactive writing rather than just me and my computer. I like answering questions that provide immediate help to people. But a written guide of some sort sounds like it might be helpful.

I am working on something concrete right now to help everyone around all of this. It's just that it's taking me a little longer than I had anticipated. I will let you know once it is completed or at least when I have something preliminary to start showing you.

"Hello from Heaven" is a great book which is about ADC accounts. I don't believe it details how to have/receive an ADC but I would have to check on that. I gave that to all members of my family when my grandfather crossed over.

Hope this helps a little.

ps. I haven't e'd you. I don't have your e address. Did you e me? [at illuminatumm@hotmail.com]. I don't believe I have rec'd anything yet.

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lauraa   

Seekingsolace,

Thanks for caring so. I look forward to your work and what you have to share with me/us. I feel that I am intuitive and the possibility of seeing my loved ones again is possible...I know they are near. I can't wait to see what you are putting together that could be on any help.

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lauraa,

I am very sorry to hear about your parents and then your husband. I can't imagine. It is so hard for me to keep focused from my one loss..things tend to replay in my mind about him so I don't know how you do it with three on your mind. I pray for you to have peace of mind, wisdom, and strength. Do you have any other family? I do but have gotten more comfort from this board and another one. That sounds worse than it is, what I mean is that they are all suffering in their own way and I seem to be the different one. They all seem to think because I cryed more that I was weak and needed protection from things that might upset me. This is not true. I needed desperately for someone else who knew my brother to just cry with me and we did a "little" but my family seems to think there is something wrong if you cry and that you should stop it as soon as you can! It seems to help me!

The things you are saying I feel also. I too have to keep going for my child and feel no zest for life. I go to the park to his games and practices and talk to the other parents but I don't feel like it. I do the laundry and cook and do dishes etc... I know what you are talking about everything seeming so trivial too. Except I know that I have to show my child how to cope, his grandmother is going to die any time now and he is very upset already. (His dad's mom)I am worried that he will take it too hard. And that I won't be as much help as I should because I still grieving my brother and I will grieve his grandmother too because I love her too.

About why your husband had to suffer. I don't know.. that is exactly why some people don't believe in God. I haven't figured it out yet either. I have felt a truckload of guilt over my brother's death. I felt like if I had just spent more time around him that I could have somehow prevented it. But I do believe that we learn from every painful thing something. (Whether it seems important or not I guess) Like I have learned certain things NOT to say to people at the funeral home from certain things that were said to me. The thing that comforted me the most was when someone just said simply, "I'm sorry" and put their arms out to hug me. And I have learned that I need to follow my gut instinct more and not to ignore the things that I keep thinking that I should do over and over. (When my brother was alive, something kept telling me to go to him and spend more time with him over and over, and I didn't. Also something kept telling me to walk, walk, and I have gained 16 pounds! which is very unusual for me to be this big! I am usually a skinny minny!) Maybe if we tune in enough, we can communicate with our loved ones AND understand the path the God wants us to take too. That is my hope...if I could just talk to my brother and hear what he has to say...

I am sorry, I hope I didn't ramble on too much. I tend to speak my thoughts out loud.

Hang in there!

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Hi everyone.

lauraane..I know EXACTLY what you mean when you say it's so hard to stay focused.The replay of events and times gone by go through my head almost constantly.It has been only 3 weeks since I lost my dad,and emotions roll over me live a wave.Sometimes I'm O.K. other times I have tears welled up in my eyes and I want to cry.I get dismissed a lot,by people who want to 'change the subject' or 'don't talk about THAT now.'It gets quite distressing,I am grief striken;how do people think I'm suppose to take my mind off it?

I am in agreement with you,that just because I cry,doesn't mean I'm weak.Some of my family/friends seems to think that not crying = getting over it.I feel exhausted after a good cry,but that is what I'm FEELING @ the time.

A friend of mine [27 years] has not called me since the beginning of the this month.She herself is fighting re-current cancer,and I guess because I got teary a couple of times after the memorial service ,she has quit calling.

Lately,I have felt that I am more alone with this healing/sadness cycle.Some people around me are uncomfortable,this I understand.But,isn't that the nature of 'going on'?Being able to talk about is going on with ourselves as we try to establish a new dynamic without our loved one?A lot of what you desribe in your post,I feel.I have 2 small children and I 'do' what needs to be done,but I don't 'feel'anything @ times but numb...no zest here either.

That being said,I have had 2 ADC's this week.Once I had a gentle pat or nudge @ my back,and the second one was I could smell A535[arthritic ointment]in my foyer.He is around,but I am not good @ connecting all these dots together as of yet.Though I know my intuition is expanding.

This board is a God-send.

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Sunflowers,

Wow, your post gave me chill bumps. I think that is wonderful that you felt a gentle pat and I had a similar "smell" experience shortly after my brother passed where I smelled that ciggarette smell he always had on him because he smoked so much and noone in my house smokes. But I blew it off because,.. well, I felt like after he passed on he shouldn't still smell like that! I am not good at figuring it out either...I am better at being in denial usually but I really want to understand this and connect with him.

Thanks for your post. I feel so much better knowing that others understand me too...(or at least feel what I am feeling). Hopefully we will learn to understand this better!

Take Care,

Laura

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lauraa   

Hello Everyone,

This is the hardest road any of us will ever travel...grieving our lost loved ones. I think though that it is a change in our mind set. They are with us but we just can't see them. It is a true test of faith I think. My husband told me he wasn't afraid of dying but he never wanted to leave me or the kids. It is all just so hard to believe that once not very long ago our lives were beautiful and full and in a heart beat "everything" changed. It is the first thing I have never been able to fix...usually my husband and I fixed all problems together and now I'm alone without him. God do I cry. Mostly in lonliness and total disbelief and it has been 13 months since he "passed". I will never say he died because I don't believe that. I have had many readings with mediums and my husband and others have come thru to let me know that. These are not quacks preying on peoples emotions as I was sure to check that out. We all need to know on this site that we are not alone and there are so many others who know our pain. It is weird for us how society handles death.....total avoidance I find which makes it harder for us...and so we carry on!...in our own ways.....god bless all of you.

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Hi everyone.

Laura [Lauraa], I agree with you ...society is in complete avoidance around death. It isn't this way everywhere in the world. And it wasn't this way always. But it certainly is this way in many places. And it needs to change.

About the last thing that any of us need when someone dies is more seperation from friends, family and others because death makes them uncomfortable and they don't know what to do. My heart goes out to them ...because they really don't know how to make it better ...and they haven't figured out that they don't have to make it better ... just being there is really enough. A hug, a hand, warmth ...These things are what matter. And the ability to just "be"..whether "being" is talking, weeping, raging, being numb, or none of the above. Just the physical presence of another human being CAN make a difference. People need to know that. Unfortunately, most times, the opposite happens. What you said in an earlier post is so true ...after the funeral ...they are all gone. Yet things don't just stop at the funeral do they? Nope. It's a process. And it's different for everyone.

People that have crossed over ARE right with you. I think what makes it so painful for people on earth is that their bodies are no longer physically present AND the lack of clear communication from them to you. That WILL change. Trust me, it will. In time technology will catch on to this need and some contraption will be produced which will allow CLEAR contact. I would be honoured to partake in such a project. We have phones, cell phones, TVs, computers ...Time to get another device invented that allows EVERYONE to clearly communicate with the Other Side. It will happen.

Laura, please say hello to your husband for me. He sounds like a wonderful person : )

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