Members ILostMydad Posted May 5, 2013 Members Report Share Posted May 5, 2013 Today is 4 months to the day I lost my father. He was my best friend, confidant, supporter, cheerleader and hero. I am still in shock to know he is no longer here to hug, kiss or hear his laugh. I miss that so very much it literally breaks my heart and takes my breath away at times. I do take anxiety meds when needed, and try to press through emotions without them. But I admit, sometimes (especially at night) it’s just too much to deal with. I have been so consumed with cleaning his house out, and prepping it to live in – that now I am in, I find the quiet takes over. I feared that once everything calms down, the emotions would start to surface more. Don’t get me wrong, I cry EVERY DAY and there is not a day that goes by where I feel some level of sadness. Some days more than others. Now, that thing’s are calming down and I am in his house, I thought I would feel more connected to him and I get so sad when I feel disconnected. There have been a slew of things that went wrong with the move and the remodel and I think that anger and aggravation is clouding my sense of connection to him. Also, the neighborhood has changed so much since I lived here with him, so a simple trip to the store triggers memories and the sheer fact of even neighborhood changes. So much change. I am blessed and thankful for he left me his wonderful home, yet I fear I will be stuck in these feelings of loss while I am here as I cannot escape it. I have only been in the house 2 weeks and I hope this shall pass. I would love to give his legacy a try. I know he would be happy that I am here. I am just feeling OFF. Any advice? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MissuDad Posted May 5, 2013 Members Report Share Posted May 5, 2013 Hi. First of all, I´m so sorry for your loss and wish I could give you some magic advice to make the pain go away, but I believe only time will help us heal. I lost my father 2 weeks ago and after a week had to come back to the house we lived in together and I can tell you nights are always the worse :-( Coming here really helps us, at least we can find solace Reading and sharing our thoughts, emotions and feelings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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