Jump to content
Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
  • Announcements

    • ModKonnie

      Advertisements   09/05/2017

      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie
momofJustin

Loss of an Adult Child

Recommended Posts

Colleen, prayers for her family, prayers for all of That sweet Angel's school buddies and teachers, she likely has made a huge dent in Everyone's hearts, and we know what the parents have to go through now, that deep missing, that irrevocable hole that over time, will fill with memories and the promise of forever. I wish your hearts well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Colleen, so very sorry to hear about the loss of this sweet little lamb. Her poor family and friends. We all know only too well their anguish. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

LouAnn, we live in a society and part of the world that expects us to behave with a degree of self control. When I see the news about other places in the world and how they weep and wail and beat their chests it is a natural  response. Letting our true emotions out in public is something that many are not comfortable with in this part of the world. We are expected to grieve in the privacy and quietness of our own homes. I remember attending a funeral of over twenty years ago for a young man in his twenties.He was newly married and had taken quite ill for only a few days. When his wife returned from work she found him dead on the bathroom floor. As you could imagine she was devastated. At the funeral we headed out to the grave site to attend the interment. They played Amazing Grace on the bagpipes. We all know how emotional that song can make us. She actually threw herself into the grave on top of his coffin. She wailed and screamed. They had to forcibly remove her from his casket. Unfortunately she was not able to be at the rest of the gathering... as they had to take her to the hospital. She suffered a complete breakdown. I will never forget witnessing her pure and real raw pain as we heard those cries of anguish. Today she is remarried and has two beautiful children. She was able to rebuild her life in time with love, support, and help. Today she is very happy.

Kira and your Dad are gone. You will not see them again in this life. You must hold on to the fact that one day you will be reunited with them when the time is right.  They are now at peace and free of their suffering. Channeling your positive energy into moving ahead with your life is the best way that you can honour them. Focus on all of those warm and beautiful memories that they have left to give you support. Hang on with both hands. As far as the family dynamics...let it go. Move forward. We all grieve differently. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow such bitter cold for you guys over there in USA and Canada stay safe and warm ok?

Louann it will take some time for everyone to kind of regroup after losing your dad such a painful occasion for everyone involved. remember feelings and emotions run high when under stress and things can be done or said that are hurtful. Hopefully it will all calm down a bit in a few weeks and your family can reconnect and be able to see each other's perspective on what happened. Maybe not. Just remember we are here for you to pour out your anguish to and are able to offer different viewpoints that you may not have considered yet because we are not intimately involved. Sometimes reading posts gives us a different perspective on things. It all takes time. I hope you are doing ok under these circumstances, and am sending you hugs.

colleen so sad a little girl of nine life can be so cruel and we all know the pain her family will be going through. When Ross was in second grade a classmate passed away also from cancer. She had not been able to attend school much because of treatments but the class kept in touch and sent her cards and balloone etc. I was friendly with her Mum and was also the class Mum so I attended the viewing intending to go to the service also. I decided Ross was too young to go and it was my first experience of an American funeral. I only made it to hug the family and then left in tears. I did not realise open caskets were commonplace and to see that little child dressed in her favourite outfit just broke me, so glad ross was not there. I know it is a cultural thing and also depends on religious beliefs sometimes but I have to confess I found it quite shocking. We Brits generally always have closed caskets and no one is allowed to see the body unless family give permission, it is only close fmily who visit. I know Irish wakes are more similar to American ones. The bravery of the family to stand up and accept condolences is amazing I could barely keep myself upright at Tommy's cremation. i did attend a couple other funerals in my time in the USA but still found open caskets a bit disturbing. It must be a British stiff upper lip thing to keep it private I guess. I am not in any way being critical of the way you guys do it, it is just different. in a way it kind of normalises death I am just sharing cultural differences. My parents and kids visited Tommy to say goodbye in the funeral parlour but my brother and sister did not want to and I got that. Even my ex husband chose not to see him. As a family we have only had one close death which was our beloved grandmother over 17yrs ago so we are fairly unused to funerals. My dad has been to loads but I think that is also a generation thing he is 83 yrs old. I do know I still find the sight of coffins on TV disturbing. By all means chime in everyone and let me know your thoughts on the subject, it is good to hear different views.

On a more positive note I have got permission to lay a small memorial plaque for Tommy in my special place in the graveyard overlooking the sea a couple miles away. There are only a couple of spaces left but the vicar agrees that as I was both christened and wed there and had all my kids christened there too that permission is given. It will take me a few months to save for the plaque but I feel it is a positive goal for myself and will feel great to have a named place for me to put flowers. If my kids want to put a plaque somewhere else that feels more right for them in addition, that is fine too, we all have different thoughts and desires but I am so happy. It has taken me over 2yrs to feel able to go ahead with this. Interestingly enough and I believe this is a sign, the church and churchyard featured twice on TV in the last month in two completely different tv dramas, to my astonishment. I have never ever seen the church featured before on tv in my 33 years of living in the UK. I take this as being Tommy saying "That is the right place for me Mum, somewhere just you and I meet". Sorry I am rambling on again, it comes from me rarely leaving my house and interacting with people in the real world, and having too much introspective time on my hands. You guys are a huge support to me and I look forward to reading and participating in posts. Thanks

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh Lesley, I am glad for you to have figured out what you want to do as far as a plaque...fabulous. And it is only right that you be allowed the space in the churchyard in a place that your Kids were involved, that you have a history with. Good. I know how good it feels to have made a decision on something so close to your heart.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

our suspects have not been arrested yet . i believe our detective just tried to file charges but the DA kicked it back for more evidence to be procured . nick is 15 months old and tho ive been granted visitation rights by the court i will not yet step up and deal with the people that nick is surrounded by . at least one of them is a remorseless killer and frankly im not all that diplomatic i could be shot and killed myself . i fail to see how that would help nick later on . 

    my ex sees nick every two weeks . she evidently doesnt grasp how dangerous  

these people are or shes just putting her suspicions and judgement aside for the sake of the baby for now . 

    the ex thinks she'd like to raise nick but she lives in an outlaw biker commune where scofflaws wander in and out year round . i had enough of that tug of war trying to lead jake in a positive direction while she ridiculed everything that jake and i stood for . i would prefer to see nick adopted into a good family where he can have the best chance at normalcy . sometimes grandparents are allowed to participate in the kids life disguised as distant aunts and uncles . i would watch nick go forever if necessary to see him have the best chance for a positive future . it isnt about what the ex and i want or need . nick has two hard strikes against him already . his dad was murdered and if you havent figured out by now ( i believe ) his mom is going to prison .

    i dont think two seperated grandparents constitute the best living situation for nick but whatever the judge decides i wont argue with .  id love to help raise him but a much smarter than myself judge needs to weigh out the options .

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all.  I wish hugs could go through computers. Your right dee, there really wasn’t that much of a family to salvage anyway. We got together for my dads last Christmas. No one will remember or acknowledge Kira. And I have long run out time limit they gave me to grieve.  Unless they lose a child they won’t even try to understand at which time they would be pounding down my door with apologies. I could so easily get dragged down in that hole again with all of this.  But with your encouragement and friendship I think this time I can handle it. I feel that peace and joy of Kira and dad dancing, looking at flowers.  And my dad saying to me see I promised you I would look after her. And that takes away my siblings screaming, my brother in law man handling me, my mother taking there sides ( at least I think she has) and my sisters stories who wasn’t even there. My family seems to think they owned my dad and I didn’t have the right to grieve , but I did grieve in my way and have no regrets.  One thing for sure we wouldn’t have to worry about a repeat of that scene. The joy in heaven drowns them all out.  I have my husband, my boys, and a few good friends and of course you guys my new family.  I am going to try and get up tomorrow with some joy in my heart. I haven’t even cleaned my house up since Boxing Day. Yikes.  Maybe I will go to the cemetery (I wasn’t invited to the burial after the service).  Anyway my grandmother always used to say onward and upward. Thank you all for staying with me thru us. Your support carried me thru.  Love Luanne 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Louanne, I think planning a nice spring garden to honor Kira and your Dad will be a nice way to feel them nearby. We are here, holding your hands and rooting you onward and upward like Grandmom used to say, and you have those people under your roof, and a few good friends, so you have goodness. You have goodness and you have grief, and you can weave those together into your heart and know that there will always be goodness right next to the grief. Brand new day.

 

Kate I appreciate the story about the young widow, the ache and pain and the show of her grief at the funeral, and I so agree that depending on the cultures, folks show their grief differently. I am glad to know that the young woman found her way, built a new way to live and found joy again in the ashes. Thank you for sharing this.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Colleen so sad to hear about the little girl. I wouldn't have been able to keep it together at all. I can't believe you are hitting 10 years. Ugh I am sorry.

I know it doesn't make any difference really but Jan 3 was 6.5 years since forest left me. It is hard to imagine and I guess these milestones are just another day but still it sucks. Our family is getting it back together a little bit now too but like you said it just isn't the same.

It is what it is i guess. I feel that my beautiful family was shattered and now we have pieced it back together the best we can. I am surviving and life goes on but under it all my heart is forever broken. Here is a picture of me with my youngest grandee Preston. 

Georgina your little grandbabies are precious!

FB_IMG_1515301268689.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gretchen, the love in your arms around Preston, his head on your shoulder shows that through it all, there is love. Forest is right there, joining in that hug, and how I wish it could be the way he used to hug you, but it a spiritual hug and a constant love. And it does matter, those half year marks as well as the full year marks, as well as just a day that feels particularly out of step...life changed all at once one day, and ones balance is never the same.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To you Gretchen, and to All, I was touched by Gretchen's photo here, that sense of being off-kilter from all that we travel-

We fall

 

I tripped again and fell,

On that invisible item that sometimes just falls before my steps,

that moment in time that sucked the air of my lungs,

that moment that stole balance from our lives,

and we lose our bearings at times without any notice, we trip again, and fall,

just as there was no notice to that time that would stand us still in our drop-jawed screams.

Except for those 4 dreams of course,

those tiny hints of terror that hinted at an upcoming grief,

but few took my retelling seriously,

and even I tried to sweep them away under the sunshine’s guise,

the trickery of a summer day.

But I trip again, and I will again, again...and fall,

from that moment in time that sucked the air from my lungs.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

dee you have a gift with words always knowing the right things to say with an accuracy and perception that is so welcomed. I fall too but never as far as I have in the past tripped up by memories or the cloud of depression that is always in my life. I am excited to be able to plan my plaque at last I just was not ready to face that before, still too fragile, and realise it is ok for me to do something that is just right for me, marking our special place.

bob the wheels of justice grind very slowly and in a murder enquiry the police really have to have all the evidence and make it watertight so they can get a conviction and a justified serious sentence passed. Nick looks adorable. I understand it is too hard to visit him because you would have to be around those guilty of his father's murder so I hope your ex keeps you in the loop and shares photos with you. It is a potentially dangerous position to put herself in but Nick is her son's child and innocent. Babies and grandbabies can really lift a grieving heart that is for sure. It is great you are trying to figure out the best living arrangements for him but I guess a judge will be in the deciding seat for that. it would be wonderful if you could still be in his life you are part of his history.

louanne yes you can handle it better now because you have come so far in a fairly short time frame and I can sense you are much stronger even if you cannot always feel it. Visiting your dad in the churchyard can be in your control and timeframe and be an opportunity for you to tell him all you want. I love dee's idea of a spring garden especially as he loved flowers, a living colourful memorial to both him and Kira.

gretchen the love in that precious photo shines through clearly. Forrest is always with you sharing in your life experiences invisibly, he never left. I know that desperate desire to hug my son physically again, hear his voice and his laugh to physically feel him in my arms but i accept I have to be patient for that day to come. I echo your words that sum it up so well.

11 hours ago, tobyfreefoot said:

It is what it is i guess. I feel that my beautiful family was shattered and now we have pieced it back together the best we can. I am surviving and life goes on but under it all my heart is forever broken.

0a14a7e6beffb31bd1ead54501eefbcd.jpg.52028ab136fd2a44947446831c7687a5.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I got some meds and am on the upward climb again.  It has taken a lot out of me to stay focused on getting Sena settled into school and all the meetings Social Services has had for me.  They still don't know what they are doing.  I have a slug of paperwork that is on hold until the 19th.  There is a guardianship court day on the 18th, and if all goes well I will have complete care of her.  

My daughter took a plea deal and the judge dropped her felony to a misdemeanor.  I have mixed emotions.  She will have 3 years supervised probation and if further arrests are made she will serve 1 year in jail.   Now she tells me she wants to fight to get her kids back.  I told her I will fight to keep Sena here until at least May.. I am to tired out to keep doing this fighting.

My thoughts are with you all.. Louanne.. Dianne .. Georgina .. Tina...  Dee....  Kate.. Sherry.. Susan.. Gretchen..Colleen.. Bob... Parker's Mom...   Lesley..  anybody I forgot.. I apologize..  hopefully as I feel better I will keep in contact more..  Take care of yourselves.. its hard..   thank you for all your thoughts and prayers

Leah

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bob, I love that you are clear thinking as to what would be best for Nick...good for you and I am glad that you are not hanging out around those that seem to value little.

Thanks Lesley for your complimentary words...some days my thoughts come out in poem form.

Leah, goodness knows you were dreading winter...it has been a rough one on you this year...now fingers crossed and prayers sent, that you get stronger each day and that you and Sena can spend some great calm and peaceful time together. I would have mixed emotions too, about your Girl getting her felony dropped...you need Sena to feel peace in her life, and it doesn't sound like your Daughter knows how to have that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dee your poem was lovely. 

I only have network television and I swear every show on it is about murder and autopsies. My husband has asbergers and spends hours and hours in front of the television as he has trouble with real life relationships so I get subjected to lots of it. Those shows just seem unending. I'm pretty good at just blocking it out but someday it really gets under my skin. Luckily for me forest did not have an autopsy but Andrew, Joshua and ashlie did as many of your children did and it just bothers me that it is splashed all over the TV for entertainment. 

Ok didn't mean to complain but no one else understands my aversion to it. Night night guys-love you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well heck Gretchen, that would get under a lot of peoples' skin...plus with so much cold it isn't like you can get out for a walk if it is below zero. Due to the weather and being home from school for two weeks, I did watch a ton of news, too much in fact, and I get so infuriated but also anxious...there are a lot of folks in charge of things that don't have common sense...that is a problem. Oh well, back to school tomorrow and here's to hoping that the Kids find some joy in our return...Glad you liked the poem. Are you still creating your fabulous paintings?

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You guys are right my dad would love a garden in the spring. I know I wouldn’t  be allow to at the cemetery but can in my own back yard. I’m still a little dumb struck, whoosy kinda at the events that just unfolded. How could someone say to  me  my. Dad could not die peacefully because of me. Especially to someone who has buried a child.  That’s is a horribly cruel thing to say to anyone. But I think it a lot higher power than anyone in my family who decided if my dad had a peaceful passing.  And I am totally convinced he did. None of thier yelling and assaulting me kept my Kira from taking grandpa home.  Well dee you said one foot in front of the other so away I go.  It’s going to start slow and take awhile to get these thoughts out on my head but I will.  I have my phone number changed and will change my email.  My husband won’t leave me home by myself so I feel pretty safe.

 

anyway Lesley when is your surgery  do you have home care in place or someone to help you.  I so wish I lived close enough to come help. 

Leah.  I am so sorry for all the fighting you have had to do and hopefully authorities will see that Sena is best with you.  What happens to the little brother, is he still in care. R u able to fight for custody of him too.  All of this physically and mentally exhausting for you. Please get some rest when u are able. 

Gretchen. 6.5 years is important your angel date is 2011; the same as mine. Look how peaceful and safe Preston looks cuddling up to granny. Sadly you are right that underneath is always that broken heart. But we have to let the light shine thru that even once in n awhile. 

Kate your story about the young widow was exactly my point. We are allowed to express our grief however we need to. There is no wrong way unless your physically hurting someone.  All of this has certainly made my husband and I think how we do not want open casket or any family but our boys present.  Wow certainly a good old fashioned Canadian winter eh.

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

leah you are really being tested having won the fight to give sena the home stability and then hearing your daughter is trying for custody. If there is a hearing which there should be the court should take all the circumstances into consideration and see where the best place is for Sena which is with you. You will offer her love stability and she will be safe from the worries of being responsible for an addicted parent. She has already been through so much and is old enough to make her voice heard but what a hard decision to choose her mum or her grandmum poor love. And for you being in the middle of it all possibly having to go up against your daughter. I so hope it all works out for the best for everyone. Glad your health is better.

gretchen I can totally see your aversion to autopsy shows. Sometimes it is for the general public to understand the process but maybe there are some who see it as entertainment. Autopsies are a matter of course for any unexplained death or to diagnose the cause. My daughter has had to attend two in the job she does as a pathology lab technician and she was very impressed with the professionalism courtesy and respect that is shown throughout as if the person was still living. The technicians are very aware that is somebody's loved one and take great care to keep that person covered up decently and make the sutures as invisible as possible so the person is left looking as best they can. My Tommy had an autopsy and it was a real part of my healing to know the details of his injuries etc on paper so my imagination was halted. I know that detail is not right for everyone. He looked untouched when we saw him, very peaceful. 

louann glad you are taking some time to gather yourself. This anger against your family may slowly ebb away and I hope you can all move forward and make some peace. We know how short life can be, but if it really is better for you to cut ties then so be it. You will know what is right inside you and remember that decisions can always be reversed at a later date, vows made in distress and anger can be changed. making a garden in spring would be a lovely tribute. My surgery has been postponed until jan 25th but there is a flu outbreak and no beds in the hospital so it may be delayed again. I dont mind other people need the bed more than me so it will be ok. I will live with my parents for a few weeks as i will be very dependent on help with everything and no driving for poss 12 weeks. My aunt is doing ok getting some of her feisty nature back which is a good sign but refusing help or aids in the house which would only help her. She is very stubborn. i visit often to entertain her as she is pretty much housebound and cannot drive either.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks, I’m pretty sure this is it for my family.  You can have disagreements about things, but especially a man physically assaulting a woman in a hospital where someone is dying and someone saying you prevented someone from having a peaceful death.  And I know I will never get an apology from them. But those things cut about as deep as it gets. There’s just no getting over those things.  They went too far this time.  My mom has four other children who I know will look after her very well and I know she will be very happy to have them. Like I said I did right by my dad before during and after his death.  And I know Kira took grandpa by the hands despite all the ruckus.  The sounds of the angels singing drowned that all out.  

Hey tina.  How you liking the new job.  I’m sorry, I wanted to be there for you for your first Christmas but I had to drop out for a bit.  I hope this job will be like a new beginning for you. You have come so far.  

 

Oh dear still have Christmas decorations up and house in bad shape of cleaning.  But I’m sure it will still be there tomorrow.  Have a nice evening everyone. And thanks again for your tremendous support. 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i do understand how an autopsy could be very helpful. i really don't know Forest's injuries. I was not allowed to see him for 3 days and then only with his face covered. i played many horrible scenarios through my mind. i just don't know why there are soo many of these csi ncis special unit shows. everyone of them shows bodies on slabs being autopsied. i don't think it is necessary but people love them. i really am not into the whole thing. i would rather watch something else but network tv is very limited and my husband always has it on with those shows running. bleah

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you for the positive thoughts Dee, Louanne  Lesley....   I know the kids are the most important consideration right now.  It is so very hard on Sena ..  She has told me her concerns of choosing here rather than staying closer to her mom.  I try to tell her, that mom is free to come visit or call...   I am only trying to get her life started .. come March at the magic age of 16 they await the next step of 18 and my little girl isn't ready, no matter how much she thinks she is.  She has crushes as other teens...   she tries to act sophisticated.. but the little girl sneaks out more than she realizes.   I am so glad to have her here with me...  she hugs me when she leaves for school.. when she comes home.. when she goes to bed..  she hugs me for no reason whatsoever except that she finally has her affection back that she has been lacking.  I think the touch is important to her.  I learned with my son he didn't like the touching after a certain age.. it is ok once in awhile.. and I am the only one that gets by with it.. but Sena is the exact opposite.   We sit and watch tv and she cuddles up..  and I see that 3 year old baby from the accident.. the one that still holds her hair and the thumb goes in her mouth.  Don't know how to break of that habit.. we had her done with it for awhile when she was younger.. but I see it again and I don't want to yell at her a lot..   sometimes I call it to her attention...  hey kiddo.. what is that thing doing in your mouth??  and she smiles.. and takes it out.. but minutes later it is back in...   I love her so much..  she is working hard in school and her bitterness over school is starting to disappear.. for her I know I have done right.

Her brother though.. I fear I will lose.   He is still being taken care of by his old foster family and they are planning on taking on guardianship.  I have made my wishes known that I would love to have him with me.  But.. I don't think they will even entertain the thought... so I have to be happy with the phone calls..  I will visit him again on the 18th..  hopefully our weather will settle down for travel.  I still hate the trip back there...   I think sometimes I am the only one who remembers the spot of the accident.  I would love to get it out of my mind when we go through.. but I have a panic attack.. dumb.. but it is still there.  Dee.. you are so right..  I wasn't looking forward to the winter.. it just plays hard on my lungs.. and my heart 

 

Louanne..   I am thinking of you hoping that your pain eases.  It is really hard to lose a parent.. Even when we know it is coming.. and we are older...   it still stings..  I know I take comfort knowing JaBoa is with her grandparents.. they were so close.

I hope everybody is staying healthy.. the cold gets tough on the body..   we are expecting another drop in the temps..  hopefully we don't get into the way below zero again.. Not the way we were...  just can't stand that.. but guess we have no control of it :-)  

Thanks again for being here.. for sharing your hearts and most of all for sharing your angels..   You are all in my heart

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i am not surprised sena still sucks her thumb she has been through so much in her young life and had to find some self comfort when she was scared and alone and the habit still helps her. That will change in time once she has stability and is able to self care her emotional health. The problems with her mum have already caused her damage and being separated from her brother too  besides the accident when you lost Jboa too, what a lot she has suffered bless her. I so wish I had a magic wand and be able to change all you are going through and facing Leah but I can't I'm sorry. I think you are incredibly strong though and you will work this through step by step. Nothing is always set in stone some things or situations can change. keep hope inside you.

I have been in contact with Rainie, Ronnie and Rocky's mum recently, and I hope she will make it back to the group. She has been through a lot and I guess just kinda dropped out of sight for a bit to regain herself. i told her she was missed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Leah glad you have Sena with you. Good for both of you. Cuddling up with her must feel really good. 

Working on a little art. Trying to keep my spirits up. Don't know why it is so hard. I have always been depressed but rarely felt lonely. Always had so much creative energy. Seems to not be as strong as it use to be. Spend a fair amount of time laying in bed doing nothing. Have to find some kind of purpose in life...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

HELLO ....TO   ALL   INDIGOS.

Parkersmom----I'm so sorry for your loss of your dear son, Parker.  This is

a good site to come to because everyone understands the sorrow of losing

a beloved child.  Sometimes, just having others who truly understand, can

help on this rough journey that no parent ever wants to be on.  Peace to you.

LouAnn----Oh,....friend...I'm sorry for you in this time of extreme sorrow in

the death of your dear father.  And, also sorry for the way your family is treating

you. Emotions run high in such times, and your dear heart is already broken with

pain in losing Kira.  Deaths and funerals are so difficult after the devastating loss

of a child.  Your plans for a spring garden in honor of your Kira, and your father is

such a nice thing to do.  They are together now, and will love the flowers that bloom

in your garden for them.   Thoughts & prayers.

 

Dee-----Glad we finally got a break in the frigid weather.  I, too, spent too much time

seeing news programs over the holidays and bad weather.   I guess that when we

 are  housebound we naturally gravitate to what's on the tube.  I got burned out on all

of it and went to my taped videos to watch some Clint Eastwood Westerns.....my favorites.:D

 

Georgina-----thanks for the pics of those two darling little granddaughters.  They

are beautiful babies. also, thanks for the heartfelt writing.  It is true, and inspiring.

Bob----thank you for the pics of your little Nick, and tattoo. Glad for justice for your son.

 

Kate-----Hope your weather is giving you a bit of a break.....even if it's a short break.:mellow:

Lesley-----So nice that you have gotten permission for the lovely plaque to honor Tommy....

and such a beautiful place to lay it......overlooking the sea. Tommy will be surely smiling down.

Colleen-----Prayers for the family of the little girl who passed recently.  Bless her little white soul.

 

Gretchen----Such a lovely picture....thanks for posting it.

Leah-----Will pray hard for you to be able to keep Sena with you.  She will always know that you

are there for her in this difficult time in her life.....the teen years.  Also, will pray for her brother.

So glad that you & Sena are so close.  Grandmothers are a source of love and stability to kids.

My own beloved Gram was such a comfort to me as a child. She was born in 1900, so has been

gone a long time, but the memories are still there.  Sena will always know you were there for her. Peace.

 

WISHING   PEACE   AND   COMFORT   TO   ALL   INDIGOS.

Davey&Lisasmom,   Sherry  

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks Sherry.  One would think after you had lost a child people might be a little bit caring for your heart that is still broken, when you lose someone else. I appreciate your comfort.  I just will not let all the hard work I’ve done up til now be all washed away by this.  I’m very confident in my mind I did right by my dad before, during and after his death. And he is with Kira.  Nobody can take that away. I bet your getting a wallop of snow there too.  Supposed to be milder here tomorrow and maybe freezing rain.  

 

Gretchen.  I know that feeling of just lying in bed with no will to get up.  I did that for 3-4 months last winter and it is a horrible feeling. I didn’t care about anything. My heart and soul were torn up.  Nothing but despair and family and friends who had decided my grieving time was up and I should be “over it” and would not be there for me. My child’s angel date is only a few weeks before Forests so I know the time frame your dealing with.  Please, please my friend don’t just lay there and let the grief consume you.....because it will eventually.  I don’t think I know about your other children and grandchildren other than Preston.  I’d love to hear about them.  R u the artist lady I recall.  I would love to see your artwork, I can’t draw a stick person.  Do anything you have to to put that one foot in front of the other and you go. My heart just breaks to think of you just laying there everyday.  We will beat this grief, all of us will together. Our hearts will always be broken but we must show our other children there can be some light come in again.  If you want a call or you want to email, let me know my friend.  I will be there always.  

Susan.  How is the surgery/recovery going . Let us know if u are able. Thoughts and prayers for you.  

Becky and Georgina.  How r things  going with your health. Let us know if you can, 

 

Tina.  How is the new job.  Hope u are enjoying it. 

glad u will have health coverage now.  How’s Grayson doing.

 

Dee and Dianne.  So u guys live close together.  Bet your getting lots of snow.  Go black hawks. I’ve always loved that team. One of the six original. 

Kate. Sorry I’ve been tied up in my mess for awhile.  Did u get to Calgary for Christmas. Bet the little dollies were so excited. As much as I look out side and complain about the snow everyday I always “I bet Kate has it worse”.  How is Ross doing, eyes better now.  

Laurie, Colleen and devianz, what’s up with you guys.  U all live in snow states.  The only one I know is warm is Susan in Texas.

lesley..thanks for your support.  Glad to hear Rainey might be coming back .  I hope so. Such a lovely lady.  

Leah, glad things are looking a little better for you and you have your dear Sena back.

sorry for anybody I missed. I feel kinda guilty I’ve been whining about my situation of the last few weeks.  Sorry if I was too needy but you guys always get, always.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Louanne,

no snow and if fact spring like winds are whipping up tonight and it is currently 51 degrees outside. Ridiculous. How can the nation's leaders deny climate change...my third graders get it. This is supposed to be winter and while many enjoy these warmer temps, the fact remains that the world is in trouble, these temps are not the norm and lack of snow is a bad thing. Today the floods that hit california after the fires raged there have caused heartache and mayhem...the earth is telling us a lot and we must listen. Those in charge must listen. Sorry, went off on a tangent. These are my thoughts tonight as springlike temps not 6 days after subzero temps. Not normal at all.

Gretchen, I am sorry taht you are feeling lonely, I do think though, that when you are in a slump like this, or when we get in slumps like yours, that you are on the verge of finding some new thing to direct you. I think we get down real low before we can climb out again. And so I am hoping that you can find your purpose or purposes and feel more yourself again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


×