Loss of an Adult Child

[Mermaid Tears]

Dee...wish you could send the rain to our part of Texas...we don't have basements in Texas...well..not this area...Daniel has started a new medication..and 'another' kind of stress test scheduled for next week...so busy...so much on my mind...two weeks ago...Ricky..(the boy that comes to my house after school)...I asked him about bluejeans..he said he needed a pair..so I told him we would go shopping the next day...that morning I remembered we had John David's clothes from his apartment in boxes..(Ricky is a big boy like John David)...so I got the boxes and started going through them...Daniel got emotional and I told him there should be some bluejeans Ricky could use...so when Ricky came he tried on many and some did fit just fine...Ricky asked.."Are you sure you want me to have them"...and Daniel told him that if John David was standing here he would give them to him...I think a lot is coming to the surface for Daniel..and it is a good thing...we have to deal with it all and not push it to the background...the 'shock' of it all is wearing thin...I have a lot to think about and take care of...I have moved from center stage to the side lines to better place myself where I can think 'on my feet'...and get myself on solid ground. Thinking of you and your GRANDdaughter daily...

[Mermaid Tears]

Thank you for sharing that photo with us Becky...I cannot describe what it meant to my heart...can only imagine your joy....simply amazing...Dee posted a photo I still have in my heart of a shaft of light on a trail...and when Kate posted about the orbs...it somehow touches me...and we need to hear and share those stories...to all on this site...let us hear your stories of signs...visits...even if it doesn't happen to me....I do feel uplifted.

[Mermaid Tears]

Prayers for you, Becky...our Warrior Mom...in your quest to lower the speed limit...

[Mermaid Tears]

Brenda...to have emotional pain is bad enough...but you also have the physical pain...I saw a friend the other day that had the same kind of neck and arm issues...she finally had surgery...finally she has no pain....so...that just may be what you will have to have....I, too, have had to reach that decision on a beloved pet...(really, they are like family)...when the time comes...and we need to release them from their suffering...your vet will give you support and information to help you in this phase...they also have literature for children to help them understand. I guess when our backs are against the wall it does seem like we will never be happy again...it may not be the 'whole happiness bundle' we had before....but joy will be a part of our morning-noon-and night lives again for we have His sweet Grace and the gift of Faith.

[BrendaDup59]

Brenda...to have emotional pain is bad enough...but you also have the physical pain...I saw a friend the other day that had the same kind of neck and arm issues...she finally had surgery...finally she has no pain....so...that just may be what you will have to have....I, too, have had to reach that decision on a beloved pet...(really, they are like family)...when the time comes...and we need to release them from their suffering...your vet will give you support and information to help you in this phase...they also have literature for children to help them understand. I guess when our backs are against the wall it does seem like we will never be happy again...it may not be the 'whole happiness bundle' we had before....but joy will be a part of our morning-noon-and night lives again for we have His sweet Grace and the gift of Faith.

Thanks so much for your comforting words , this is just so hard I want to do what is best for Nikki but my heart hurts so much for the loss my son Kaleb is going to feel . this is his best friend and I have talked to my vet about what to do I guess they do not have any info on how to help with that part . I did start her on a steroid to see if she will eat but I think we are going to have to let her go tomorrow . I am giving her until then to see if she will eat, they said it is the pancreatitis that is why she is not eating but I think she may have cancer in her pancreas also, she has Lymphoma in her spleen and liver .and I cant take her big brown eyes looking at me almost as if she is asking me to help her .. I know in my heart I have done what I can but she will leave such a black hole in our lives when she is gone .

as for me I am taking some anti inflammatory and it is helping ,I have not had a chance to get an appointment with the Pain management clinic,I am so over whelmed with so much on my plate I find I just shut down. Thanks again

[ericasmom]

Susan, home now, school was canceled after those in charge saw that most roadways are impassable. We live three blocks off a narrow section of a river and the river is getting higher by the moment, our yard is completely underwater. The water is to the line of the house, husband keeps bailing water.

Anyhow, I love what you wrote about the signs and the hope they give...you had light right there in your house. You had the boy that needed jeans wearing John David's jeans. A light of such brightness that even your Daniel was able to say, "YES, John David would say take these." That too is magic, a sign for you both to know that in your kind acts, there lives your BOY.

Yes, that last layer of shock is wearing away, and leaving your Husband so wounded, that was a great step forward though, your offering these tangible things of John David to a boy in need. Your instincts are very good.

This rain would be very bad without basements Susan, your home would have a lot of water by now. I am hoping that some of the heaviest storms have passed, but the weather folks assure us that there are more. It is unnerving. While we definitely needed water, while the farmers so needed water, this is too much too fast. The farmers of the mid-west cannot get their seeds planted in this kind of rain, but I do believe that they are far happier than last year at this time.

Brenda, ask your library for this book; in the children's section;Cat Heaven and I think now there is a Dog Heaven. Just a beautiful way to think of where our pets go.

Also, The Tenth Best Thing About Barney. THis is about a cat but can be applied to any pet as it tells of a boy who is so very sad about his cat dying and how he is helped by making a list of the ten best things about Barney, the cat. THis list lets kids know that they won't forget about the cat and allows the good memories to come into play. I think that there is a Mr. Rogers book too, about when a pet dies. There are more now as we slowly learn to explain death a bit more to kids. I also have books about the loss of people; Saying Goodbye to Grandma, Blackberries in the Dark, Where's Mama?

Each year I read, LOVE THAT DOG, by Sharon Creech to my class. I always wait until April, Poetry month even though we read poetry all year. It is my kick off to more poetry as the book is written in poetry. It is all about a boy in the third grade, who begins to understand poetry and in his discovery, finds ways to deal with the death of his Dog. I have read this book for 12 years in a row, cry every time, many kids cry too, boys and girls alike. We pass the box of tissue. It is cathartic and it is life.

I do hope your physical pain can ease-I agree with Susan, emotional anguish is horrid, to add the physical limitations with it is just too much.

[Jeff's Mom]

Dee, so very sorry to hear this news about the flooding. I have to say that the weather pattern this year has brought so much distress to many areas in North America. I wish I was close at hand to help push up my sleeves and sandbag. The news this morning is now that North Dakota will have a major flooding again that will see one of the worst in fifty years. The Red River is so swollen and heading north our way. Also, much water coming from Saskatchewan flowing into our lake. This is very serious indeed. Brenda, my heart is with you today, as you are faced with making this difficult decision. One can become so attached to a beloved pet. That as well as facing your chronic pain can seem too much to take at times. We are here for you to listen. As far as signs from our kids are concerned....many of us on this forum have spoken in the past of very definite signs. Some extremely obvious and others not so much. Beyond the orb experience I have had many signs at first after my son died. As he went so quickly and unexpectedly I feel that he too was shocked that he was actually dead. We were so close and he was a very decent and loving young man. His concern for us showed at all times. I feel that he was not able to rest properly until he had been able to let us know that he was indeed at peace. He was given the gift of being able to convey that to me in a way that dispelled all doubt. It is now giving me incredible comfort at a time that I desperately need it. My mind is drifting with anxiety these days. Everything is happening so quickly with my husbands illness. This morning he was quite pleased to see me actually slicing a banana into my coffee mug instead of my cereal bowl! Go figure? I was so distracted that I was not paying a particle of attention to what I was doing. Oh life can certainly send us challenges each and every day. I guess it is always going to be that way. It is up to me to decide how to handle it. Sending love to all. Kate

[BrendaDup59]

Susan, home now, school was canceled after those in charge saw that most roadways are impassable. We live three blocks off a narrow section of a river and the river is getting higher by the moment, our yard is completely underwater. The water is to the line of the house, husband keeps bailing water.

Anyhow, I love what you wrote about the signs and the hope they give...you had light right there in your house. You had the boy that needed jeans wearing John David's jeans. A light of such brightness that even your Daniel was able to say, "YES, John David would say take these." That too is magic, a sign for you both to know that in your kind acts, there lives your BOY.

Yes, that last layer of shock is wearing away, and leaving your Husband so wounded, that was a great step forward though, your offering these tangible things of John David to a boy in need. Your instincts are very good.

This rain would be very bad without basements Susan, your home would have a lot of water by now. I am hoping that some of the heaviest storms have passed, but the weather folks assure us that there are more. It is unnerving. While we definitely needed water, while the farmers so needed water, this is too much too fast. The farmers of the mid-west cannot get their seeds planted in this kind of rain, but I do believe that they are far happier than last year at this time.

Brenda, ask your library for this book; in the children's section;Cat Heaven and I think now there is a Dog Heaven. Just a beautiful way to think of where our pets go.

Also, The Tenth Best Thing About Barney. THis is about a cat but can be applied to any pet as it tells of a boy who is so very sad about his cat dying and how he is helped by making a list of the ten best things about Barney, the cat. THis list lets kids know that they won't forget about the cat and allows the good memories to come into play. I think that there is a Mr. Rogers book too, about when a pet dies. There are more now as we slowly learn to explain death a bit more to kids. I also have books about the loss of people; Saying Goodbye to Grandma, Blackberries in the Dark, Where's Mama?

Each year I read, LOVE THAT DOG, by Sharon Creech to my class. I always wait until April, Poetry month even though we read poetry all year. It is my kick off to more poetry as the book is written in poetry. It is all about a boy in the third grade, who begins to understand poetry and in his discovery, finds ways to deal with the death of his Dog. I have read this book for 12 years in a row, cry every time, many kids cry too, boys and girls alike. We pass the box of tissue. It is cathartic and it is life.

I do hope your physical pain can ease-I agree with Susan, emotional anguish is horrid, to add the physical limitations with it is just too much.

Thanks so much Dee, I will check them out ..

[Mermaid Tears]

Thank you so much for giving us the info on these books...so much flooding in different places....we only got a little...and can use days of rain...am praying for Boston and West, Texas...so very sad and tragic.

Walkby faith....it doesn't matter if your child is 6 days old...6 years old...26...36...46.....we are still 'the parent'...but grief is what we do to heal...and some places...Dee says..'the hole in our heart'..will never heal...but we learn to go forward. Kate told you to be 'very good to yourself'...and we call it 'self care'...simply do whatever will comfort yourself. Don't spend too much time on people around you that you feel aren't treating you the way they should.....I have to confess...I did not know of 'this kind of grief' til my son died...so please be forgiving of others that just 'don't get it'. Come to this site and post your heartache and heartbreak...we will hold your hand and help you walk this foreign path.

Mike's Dad.....what you posted about the young man that called you just broke my heart...that his own family wasn't around...and his girlfriend broke up with him...then...what you posted made my heart smile...that you were going to visit him...I do believe that He Above is looking over you....sending you 'two boys' to wrap your arms around. HE works in mysterious ways. In this school of grief...we have a slippery slope...we can either become bitter....or...become better. I am betting that you are 'becoming better'....keep us posted..for I do want to hear the next chapter in your story.

[ericasmom]

Susan and Brenda, glad that the books are helpful. Kids need to see what they are going thorugh in print, letting them know that others go through this grief too. That after all, is what we do here and when we read a grief book. We feel that others on this journey know. That is comforting in many ways, and kids need that too.

SUsan, the hole in our hearts never heal completely, but we fill that hole with the goodness of them, withthe good acts we see and we perform and therefore that hole in our hearts is healing due to these. THis takes time, so while being good to yourselves, understand that we need time to start the new processes. Be patient with YOU>

Prayers for those in Wako Texas.

[BrendaDup59]

We had to let our girl go tonight , she wasn't able to hold water down and she was shaking all over.. I just hate this, I just feel sick about the heart ache my son is going to feel,my husband left crying taking her to the vets .. this is the last picture I took of her a little bit ago.. I will forever miss my girl .

[JD's Mom, Becky]

Well, the meeting with DelDOT about reducing our speed limit was held, but we still don't have an answer. They didn't make a decision today, but said they would SOON. Our points were based on statistics and data, and that is what I hope they will make their decision on. I don't want a sympathy vote, I want to make a REAL difference, one that will honor my child and truly prevent another family from having to go through what we have. Anything other that what we asked for, would just be putting something on paper that looks good, but in reality wouldn't go a long way to preventing death. I ask for your continued prayers while they are in the decision making process.

[Jeff's Mom]

We had to let our girl go tonight , she wasn't able to hold water down and she was shaking all over.. I just hate this, I just feel sick about the heart ache my son is going to feel,my husband left crying taking her to the vets .. this is the last picture I took of her a little bit ago.. I will forever miss my girl .

Brenda....holding you close. I know you absolutely did the right thing. In looking at her picture she most certainly did look very ill. Thinking of you. Kate

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

I am posting this story from Guideposts in honor of all of our pets that have ministered to us in our grief. My own dog, Daisy, often sits with me through my grief storms doing her best.

Heaven-Sent Canine Comfort

The tragic shootings at Sandy Hook brought all of us together, including God’s most sensitive creatures.

By Barb Granado, Chicago, Illinois

http://www.guidepost...omfort?page=0,0

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

"Don't spend too much time on people around you that you feel aren't treating you the way they should.....I have to confess...I did not know of 'this kind of grief' til my son died...so please be forgiving of others that just 'don't get it'. Come to this site and post your heartache and heartbreak...we will hold your hand and help you walk this foreign path."

Mermaid tears, thank you for your wonderful, kind words that you post on this site...

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

Since my baby boy will be born early to mid June I'll be going to see my son's friend may 5-20th. I just got my plane ticket, I'm excited to see him, I really need to be better about calling him than I have been, I know I can help him.

That is wonderful that you are going. May it be a time of healing for you both.

[Guest]

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[shorty16]

Mike,

You are an amazing man.

Colleen, Brian's Mom 4ever

[shorty16]

Jesse,

You said it....I never knew this depth of pain existed before my Brian died. When people say insensitive things to me...I often say to myself. ...they have no idea the depth of this pain...and I hope they never will.

I also live in Wisconsin...where is this great state so you live?

Colleen Brian's Mom 4ever

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

Jesse,

You said it....I never knew this depth of pain existed before my Brian died. When people say insensitive things to me...I often say to myself. ...they have no idea the depth of this pain...and I hope they never will.

I also live in Wisconsin...where is this great state so you live?

Colleen Brian's Mom 4ever

Well, I live by Marshfield WI. I think you live a little above Hubertus or in that area? My sister lives on Lake Keesus so I am getting to know that area of the state more. As far as the quote by Mermaid Tears, I agreed with her because there were so many times people just come up with really silly things to say. I believe at times they are trying to be helpful, but are just so stuck in their own little box and don't know any better.

[daveydow1]

Kate-----I'm glad that you are seeing some signs of spring. It helps to lift

the spirits, I know. Sorry that you wasn't able to answer the questions

about Scotland, at the ladies meeting. I think that at times when we get

a lot of questions in rapid succession that we often aren't able to answer

them. I have had similar situations like this happen to me, also. In my

case, I should have been able to answer the questions easily, but found

myself sort of grappling for words somehow. I'm sending prayers for

you and your dear husband. Peace to both of you, my friend.

Betsy-----Thanks for the pic of the covered bridge. It is just lovely......

the kind of scene that can bring some measure of serenity to one's soul.

I'm glad that you found such a lovely place.

Brenda-----Oh...I'm so sorry that your dog had to be put down because of

the cancer. It's very difficult and heartbreaking to lose a faithful pet, I know.

I had to have my 15 yr. old faithful cat put to sleep a year ago, and I so know

what you mean about all the tears falling and the pain of the loss. Sending

prayers for you, Kaleb, and the family in this sad time.

Dee----Deer!!! They are such lovely animals to look at, but are very

distructive to plants/shrubs/ & gardens. Sorry that they ate all your flowers.

We have a pussy willow trying, mightily, to grow in the backyard, and each

early spring when it starts to bud, the deer come and chew off the tender

buds. I need to spray it with some hot pepper-type spray to discourage

their grazing. Wow....you sure have gotten a lot of rain. We had a good bit

of rain a few days ago, but not as much as you got there in Chicago.

Prayers for the little 2 yr-old boy.

Becky----Nice pic of the beam of light.......surely your dear boy, JD, sending

it down to you to let you know he loves his family. Hoping that the DELDOT

will decide to reduce the speed limit on your road. You have worked so hard.

Walkbyfaith7-----I'm so sorry for your loss of your sweet baby girl. You have

found a good site to come to. I, too, have lost a baby....she was 6 mo. old,

many years ago. ...then my son age 31 almost 10 years ago. This site is a

good place to come whenever you want to 'talk' about your loss, or anything

at all. Please come back to BI (Beyond Indigo).....you are always considered

one of the BI family. Thoughts & prayers.

Hi to our friends who may not have been on BI lately......Betty, Leah, Shelly, Kathy (summergirl),

Amy, Rhonda, and Gretchen. Take care, friends.

Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry

[JD's Mom, Becky]

Just wanted to let you all know that the girl I asked you to pray for, Danielle, is awake and improving! They did heart surgery, and she is still being given oxygen, but her heart seems to be working, although weak. They are encouraging her to be calm as possible and hoping with rest and care that her heart will get stronger. Her mom, Michele, is in Mexico with her children and visiting her at the hospital. Visits are kept short due to her condition, but this is for sure an answer to many prayers that she woke up and responsive!

[BrendaDup59]

Kate-----I'm glad that you are seeing some signs of spring. It helps to lift

the spirits, I know. Sorry that you wasn't able to answer the questions

about Scotland, at the ladies meeting. I think that at times when we get

a lot of questions in rapid succession that we often aren't able to answer

them. I have had similar situations like this happen to me, also. In my

case, I should have been able to answer the questions easily, but found

myself sort of grappling for words somehow. I'm sending prayers for

you and your dear husband. Peace to both of you, my friend.

Betsy-----Thanks for the pic of the covered bridge. It is just lovely......

the kind of scene that can bring some measure of serenity to one's soul.

I'm glad that you found such a lovely place.

Brenda-----Oh...I'm so sorry that your dog had to be put down because of

the cancer. It's very difficult and heartbreaking to lose a faithful pet, I know.

I had to have my 15 yr. old faithful cat put to sleep a year ago, and I so know

what you mean about all the tears falling and the pain of the loss. Sending

prayers for you, Kaleb, and the family in this sad time.

Dee----Deer!!! They are such lovely animals to look at, but are very

distructive to plants/shrubs/ & gardens. Sorry that they ate all your flowers.

We have a pussy willow trying, mightily, to grow in the backyard, and each

early spring when it starts to bud, the deer come and chew off the tender

buds. I need to spray it with some hot pepper-type spray to discourage

their grazing. Wow....you sure have gotten a lot of rain. We had a good bit

of rain a few days ago, but not as much as you got there in Chicago.

Prayers for the little 2 yr-old boy.

Becky----Nice pic of the beam of light.......surely your dear boy, JD, sending

it down to you to let you know he loves his family. Hoping that the DELDOT

will decide to reduce the speed limit on your road. You have worked so hard.

Walkbyfaith7-----I'm so sorry for your loss of your sweet baby girl. You have

found a good site to come to. I, too, have lost a baby....she was 6 mo. old,

many years ago. ...then my son age 31 almost 10 years ago. This site is a

good place to come whenever you want to 'talk' about your loss, or anything

at all. Please come back to BI (Beyond Indigo).....you are always considered

one of the BI family. Thoughts & prayers.

Hi to our friends who may not have been on BI lately......Betty, Leah, Shelly, Kathy (summergirl),

Amy, Rhonda, and Gretchen. Take care, friends.

Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry

Thank you Sherry, we will miss our girl so much , I know I did the right thing when Mike came home from taking her and said she went very fast thank goodness from working for a vet I know the things that can sometimes go wrong not very often anyway after she passed her bowels let go and it was dark blood , I had told the vet when I called her I thought Nikki's abdomen looked like it was bloated , I think when they did the biopsy on her spleen and liver I do not think it stopped bleeding so she was filling up with blood breaks my heart to know she was in so much pain even taking pain medication . Kaleb took it like he did when he lost his brother he has not cried about her yet I know he will someday .Kaleb just processes things differently . Brenda

[Guest]

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[rlolheiser]

Just wanted to post and tell you all I am still thinking of you, I don't get online everyday, seems my free time is more and more gone. I never thought it was possible. Oh well, it keeps me out of trouble.

I have been watching the weather and think of what your going through, seems like a wild year already, and not looking forward to what may come. We just finished up this last monday with 16 inches of snow... If I didn't have mom here, I would let it melt.. but have to keep shoveling it :-) boy am I old. At least we aren't to close to the flooding in ND... we have a little bit around the Heart River from time to time, and makes my creek go up.. then the kids have to stay near the house.. it makes me nervous.

Mom has been more sickly, we have lots of decisions to make, they want her to have a colonoscopy, which frightens me.. anytime she has to go under it frightens me. Mom wants a guarantee that she won't lose any more brain function (she has already lost so much, somedays she just isn't here)... we meet with a new dr on friday, and I plan to ask what good this will do... she has been told no surgeries.. she is 80 and what guarantees can they give her... I fear that she will be left far harder to care for.. yet I want to give her a chance at longer life.. but is it going to be a better one... tough call.. I hate this.

I am still fighting with Social services to get my grandson.. even with the judges order saying if I pass everything and my county finds me fit, we can have him, they are still witholding him from me. It is getting way to personal, that little boy is my grandson, JaBoa's brother... and he has the right to know his sister Sena... My husband and I have passed everything and still no little guy, I am requesting another court date. this has been going on since last June that I have actively sought custody of him, and the social worker keeps saying no family has stepped up.. starting to feel frustrated.

My daughter is still drug free, and I don't think she is ready for the kids, but she is still working for it. I am proud of her, we are still able to discuss our angel, How I enjoy speaking freely of her. its a long road, and not everything is how I want it.. far from it.. but I still have the love and ability to keep going..

I see so many new parents here.. I see so many places and feelings that I have gone through... still go through.. but having this site does help, even when I can't be here, I know I can come and connect again.

I still have a cold, I was well for about a week, and wham.. with the new snow came a new cold :-) guess it just isn't meant to go away :-)

I think of you all, Dee ( sorry your in the line of the flooding.. be careful), Sherry, Kate, Carol, Rhonda, Susan, Brenda, and all of you that the names escape this overloaded brain.. When I do take time for me.. I float my thoughts around our angels and I get by.

Be kind to yourselves, I think we are our harshest critics

[Jeff's Mom]

Leah, so very nice to hear from you again. I am really pleased to see that your daughter is trying so hard to keep herself clean. Not an easy thing to do. Good for her! Sorry to hear your Mom is slipping. it is never easy to watch as our parents do the downward spiral thing. The colonoscopy is essential if you ask me. That is how they found my husband's cancer. He did not feel a thing as they had him completely under. Sherry, thanks for you kind words. I do know that this can happen under stress. Just the same I felt such an idiot. Oh well, it's over now. Becky, the news about Danielle is wonderful!!! her family must be very happy. I hope she continues to make a good recovery. Lora, have fun today. Enjoy a day off just going with the flow. Brenda, I am sorry about your dog. I am glad that it happened so quickly and I am sure they treated the dog with the utmost of compassion and dignity. Dee, how are things going your way? I saw on the weather network that the rains were indeed torrential. I hope your property did not sustain too much damage. Well, we hear from our family doc late evening. They normally do not call that late. it is always reason to be concerned. About this point I can only ask for continued prayers and a positive outlook. Never say never! The skies are a brilliant blue and the sun is shining nicely today. My hope is that everyone here will find a degree of peace in your day. Kate

[Jeff's Mom]

Leah, so very nice to hear from you again. I am really pleased to see that your daughter is trying so hard to keep herself clean. Not an easy thing to do. Good for her! Sorry to hear your Mom is slipping. it is never easy to watch as our parents do the downward spiral thing. The colonoscopy is essential if you ask me. That is how they found my husband's cancer. He did not feel a thing as they had him completely under. Sherry, thanks for you kind words. I do know that this can happen under stress. Just the same I felt such an idiot. Oh well, it's over now. Becky, the news about Danielle is wonderful!!! her family must be very happy. I hope she continues to make a good recovery. Lora, have fun today. Enjoy a day off just going with the flow. Brenda, I am sorry about your dog. I am glad that it happened so quickly and I am sure they treated the dog with the utmost of compassion and dignity. Dee, how are things going your way? I saw on the weather network that the rains were indeed torrential. I hope your property did not sustain too much damage. Well, we hear from our family doc late evening. They normally do not call that late. it is always reason to be concerned. About this point I can only ask for continued prayers and a positive outlook. Never say never! The skies are a brilliant blue and the sun is shining nicely today. My hope is that everyone here will find a degree of peace in your day. Kate

[Guest]

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[Mike's dad]

Thank you mermaid tears, even though I could never have treated my son this way if he had come home, I would've wanted someone to reach out to my boy if it was him.

[daveydow1]

Becky----So glad to hear that Danielle is improving. Continuing to pray for her

recovery.

Leah----Good to see your post, friend. Sorry that your mom is failing some. As

someone else said.....it is sad to see a parent losing ground with their health.

Good to hear that your daughter is staying drug-free, and in due time, hoping she

will be able to have the kids again. I can't----for the life of me----figure out why

the courts are dragging their feet about granting you and your husband custody

of your little grandson. Seems only good sense to place a child with his own

family. I hope your cold improves......they sure can sap one's energy and make

you feel 'down' . It's nice that you and your daughter can now talk of your little

angel, JaBoa. It's good to have open lines to conversation about that sweet

little girl, and it will help your daughter, I think.....especially if she has been

reluctant to speak about JaBoa in the past. I think that it can only help. You

are right about coming to BI......when someone is not able to be on the site.....

even for quite awhile......when they come back again, it's like they never left,

because we're all a family....bound together because of our sad circumstance

of losing beloved children and grandchildren, and also other loved ones sometimes.

Wishing you peace and tranquility, Leah.

Lora----Hope you had fun shopping today. (I think a good 'shopping fix' would

improve my outlook too.)

Kate-----I hope that you will be hearing positive news from the Dr. I, so, know what

you mean about feeling inadequate when unable to answer qestions. I do the same.

I think that it may be because we are always coached and trained from childhood to

answer people's questions appropriately. But....of course---there are always awkward

times when people ask too many questions, or worse----prying questions. At any rate--

we do, often , feel "dumb", but actually we shouldn't, I believe. Not always easy

though, I know. Sending prayers.

Dee-----How's things going there in Chicago where there has been so much bad

weather? I heard a little bit bout a giant sinkhole on a highway that swallowed up cars---

terrible tragedy. Is your basement/yard drying up yet? It rained here today, and the

temp dropped nearly 20 degrees throughout the afternoon......20's tonight.

PEACE AND COMFORT TO ALL INDIGOS.

Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry

[ericasmom]

May there be some healing tonight in the Boston area with the younger suspect caught. Hopefully, no more of this.

Leah, always good to see you. Sorry though that your little Guy is still not with you! Where is he then? Sadness, I will pray on that in a few minutes. I am so glad to hear your Daughter is doing better. That you and she can speak of JaBoa is grand. Mom is in her 80's and they want to do a colonoscopy? Seems like a lot of surgery and recovery for a woman who has been declining for some time now. Quality of life far outweighs quantity in cases such as these...however that said, when the person is someone you love, it is much harder to make these decisions. Does your Mom make the medical decisions or do you have power of attorney? I wish you did not have this to tustle with. I will pray on that too.

Be well Leah, we miss you.

Sherry, the water is draining from the garden, the grass is showing now adn the depth of water is decreased greatly and the area of water has shrunk considerably but it is cold and we had a few bouts of snow today...in the 60's yesterday but it dropped like a rock last night. We are not pleased.

Kate, news for your Hubby?

Becky, so hoping that Danielle continues to amaze and defy the odds.

Keep prayers for the little guy of my friend. He remains in the hospital fighting infections in his lower GI tract.

Going to sleep, very tired, oh how teachers are tired on Fridays.

[Mermaid Tears]

Prayers for the little guy....

[Guest]

.

[Jeff's Mom]

Lora, I definitely believe in these things. I hope your day of shopping yesterday was a good one. Dee glad that the rain has finally stopped. How did things go with your garden? it must be very frustrating to have sown all of those seeds, etc. to have had this happen. I will definitely keep your little guy in my prayers. We waited until late last night, but we did not get the call we had expected. Now comes the waiting game. I guess he got caught up in other stuff. I am sure that he will get around to calling today. Very frustrating when you have to hang around for the phone. Speaking of weather patterns? Well, you should be up here. It is all over the place. Ontario had beautiful weather the last few days. Now it has taken another plunge. Same thing in Alberta. And as for us? Well, let's just say I am beginning to think that summer will never arrive. The snow is more shrinking than melting. I woke up to -12C this morning. That is just simply nuts! It should be well into the teens by now. Which translates into 60's for you guys down there. So glad to see that they caught that guy in Boston. Oh my, when will all of this end? I hope everyone has a decent enough day. Take care. Love, Kate

[ericasmom]

Lora, I agree with Kate, I totally believe in ghosts or good spirits as I always felt that I had some nearby. When I was little I felt this way as well. Love the story, thanks for sharing.

Yes, shopping is hard when you used to buy things for your Girl. Soon after ERi died, I went to Nordstrom's Junior department where Eri and I spent many shopping trips and I wept, but needed to go to just feel that sense of her there. I know that she and I shared many a good time there and that energy still exists inside of me.

Kate, our perennial garden just comes to us year after year and even in flooding years, we have done pretty well. This time it is hard to tell because much of what comes up is yet to show itself. The flooding we have had in previous times has come after everything is up, mid summer. I think that we will have most of our plants return, though in years past we have lost butterfly bush after too much rain. We'll see. Today is sunny and a coating of...SNOW! April 20th snow, my birthday and this surely isn't the first snowy birthday of mine. My Son and Grandgirl were going to take me for a birthday walk this morn, but it is only 33 degrees so i will go over and visit instead.

[Mermaid Tears]

I think you will have an extra Birthday gift this year...and a blessed one...having that Baby Girl all 'wrapped' up in a warm blanket...you can open it up like a present and kiss all those baby toes...fingers...and PINK cheeks....Happy Birthday from all of us here that you have touched with your spirit..heartache...and grief lessons.....to help us navigate these dark waters. Thank You for staying on this site for 'all these years'...He must have put a message on your heart...that people from 'all over' will need to have one of HIS chosen ones...(yes..I am getting a glimmer that we have been 'chosen' in some way to carry a message of faith and hope and to help each other).....and that you heard and heeded the message...and look how many of us have been comforted by your letting us know that the 'way' we act or feel...is...simply normal...and for us to carry forward and that we can.

Happy Birthday Dee...may all that is Bright and Beautiful come your way....and your heart filled to the brim with Blessings.

[Mermaid Tears]

My son, Jesse, that had the 'new little man' in my life in December told me the other day that Wyatt John will be looking around the room and smiling like he 'sees' someone....and he wonders 'who'...???

Lora...I believe, too, in things unseen....

[mikesmomrs]

Dee...happy, happy birthday! Yes, you will indeed have another birthday present to open...just pull that blanket aside and peer into those beautiful eyes, touch those soft, baby cheeks and relish the moment...all of them. But, I don't have to tell you that, do I? Relishing the moment is a way of life we need to follow...life has taught us here that, if nothing else. Give that beautiful "gift" a hug for me, and sweet, sweet kisses on those beautiful, blessed cheeks! Have a happy day, weather be danged...the sun is shining even more brightly in your little corner of the world...

[shorty16]

Happy Birthday Dee

Enjoy your day, you deserve it

Colleen, Brian's Mom 4ever

[BrendaDup59]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEE

[ericasmom]

Why thanks Ladies for the great birthday wishes. I went to visit with my Son and Grandgirl ( DIL was out with her Mom for a bit) and had a lovely visit. Tonight, they will take my husband and me to dinner. How fun!Erica Elizabeth is so very lovely. Susan, what a sweet thing to say, thanks very much.

[Jeff's Mom]

ENJOY THAT BIRTHDAY DINNER, HOPE YOUR SPECIAL DAY WAS A GOOD ONE.

[Guest]

.

[shorty16]

To all my friends,

It was a nice sunny day today..still pretty chilly.

Both kids are out with friends and hubby is sleeping.

It is times like these that I think about Brian..what he would be doing.

My prayers go out to those newly bereaved families in Boston and Texas. Their journeys have just begun.

I am sending prayers to all of you on this site..We will say their names loud and clear,

Colleen, Brian's Mom 4ever

[ericasmom]

Thanks, dinner was very nice. A local place where one of my great nephews is the line cook. It was great, as usual. Always nice to spend a bit of time with Kevin, great nephew. He is a lumberjack sized guy with a sweet heart.

Erica slept through dinner but made those undeniably great baby faces throughout the time there. Adorable.

Col, yes, sunny but chilly--so good to see the sun though.

Indeed, those families will have to go through the steps that we have all taken plus some more due to the public nature of the tragedies. Blessings to them.

[shellykut]

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY DEE! I agree with the others, this year's gift is one that will keep on giving! You can watch Erica Eileen grow and love her all the while because love is a gift, isn't it?

I pray everyone has a blessed Sunday! Love, Shelly

[JD's Mom, Becky]

Happy Birthday, Dee!! Hope you had a great day! You definitely deserve it!

Didn't get on here yesterday, as it was Saturday, and hubby off from work, so we both worked in the yard all day. Got a lot done that I wasn't able to do last year because of my neck surgery. I feel like I have been beaten this morning though!

Michele wrote that her daughter, Danielle has been moved to her own room!! She is eating soft foods, and coming along, but still a long way to go. Very weak but happy to be alive and thankful for all the prayers!!

[ericasmom]

Thanks and yes I agree Shelly, Baby-girl is a gift to our lives indeed. And yes Becky, it was a great day. My you did a lot of yard work, nice that after a year, your neck is able to withstand the rigor. Be careful, don't overdue. We get so excited with the spring that it is hard to tame ourselves and divide the work up over days instead of all at one time.

Sun is shining and we may get up to 55, i hope so. SOme areas in Illinois have 4 ft of water in the streets still, not here,except in one area that is burmed and off limits.

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

Michele wrote that her daughter, Danielle has been moved to her own room!! She is eating soft foods, and coming along, but still a long way to go. Very weak but happy to be alive and thankful for all the prayers!!

That is wonderful news. I did receive in my email a notice that said the prayer volunteers from Guideposts were lifting Danielle up in prayer. Thank you for sharing this request. Jesse David's mom

[ericasmom]

I went for a 45 minute walk in the sunshine with Shan and Baby Erica. It was lovely. She makes the best faces.

Earlier, husband and I went to HOME DEPOT just to look at some plants, shouldn't need to buy much, but did buy a few for the boxes on the front steps. Next time, more for my many giant pots in the yard. Love the colors and the shapes. We did buy some columbine to add to ours that are coming up, adding some new colors and sizes. Bought Ranuculus for the boxes, which I adore. so many petals and layered in perfection.