Loss of an Adult Child

[Jeff's Mom]

Thanks to everyone for posting such moving poetry. I have read every post the past few days, but found I was somehow in a bit of a slump. I think of you all and hope that each day will bring some degree if peace and happiness in some small way. Leah, my goodness...it is so good to hear from you. I think of you often and how things are going your way. Sorry to hear that your mom is failing and becoming more difficult. How is your knee? I am glad that at least JaBoa's mom is making a concerted effort to clean up her act. I know it has played havoc with your nerves. We will always worry about our kids as long as we breathe. Carol, is it this weekend that you go to the ballgame? I don't have to ask who you are cheering for. How are the Red Sox doing this season? My husband tells me they are first place in their league. Dee, I remember from past years you mentioning how hot it got in the classroom. Any chance of air conditioning installed in the future? Becky, your poem sure rang true and was so heartfelt by all on this forum...as are everyone's. I am so sorry that things are not going well in regards to your efforts about the warning signs. There is no accounting for why people can be so heartless. At least you know you have friends that do care here. Well, we went for another walk this morning along the boardwalk by the lake at a nearby resort town. The sun was warm and the breezes were so very refreshing. It is a truly lovely day today. Just perfect. Yesterday's chemo treatment went without incident. Last night was not the best, but this morning things appeared ok. His hair has really thinned out and he has several bald spots but we just laugh and remark at how cool it is not to have to worry about the heat. He will lie down again for another sleep this afternoon and then we are hoping to go into the site to sit on the bench where Jeff's ashes are scattered. Thinking of everyone and sending love. Kate

[Mermaid Tears]

This is from me....to all of you.....for some reason...when I read this...it touched something deep in me....hope it does for each of you....

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

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[daveydow1]

Leah-----So good to see you, our BI friend. Sorry that your mom is failing. I know

the way it is.....my mom is also going downhill a bit, but still holding her own

as for right now. Sorry that your fight to gain custody of your little grandson has

not brought about the desired results yet. Know just what you mean about computers.

My computer is getting older, and more "cranky"....a real pain. Hope it holds out a

bit longer, as I don't have the extra cash for a new one right at the moment. Sending

lots of prayers for you. Take care.

Kate-----Thinking of you. How's your weather now? Lots of signs of the 'end of summer'

around here, but still quite pleasant. Trees just beginning to show tinges of a different

color..... sound of crickets in the daytime as well as night....and garden needing attention.

Sending prayers.

Dee-----Yikes ! I hope that the first several days of school are not as hot as anticipated.

The kids will surely be antsy and take awhile to 'settlle in' to the routine. Yep---summer

is quickly winding down. I'll be spending the last wk. of Aug. helping my sister get my

mom moved to her new 1-floor apt. near my sis. Her 2-story home is too challenging

for her anymore with her arthritis. Hope it all goes well. She seems to be taking the

change fairly well. We have lots of tomatoes in the garden now, and potatoes. I canned

some tomato juice for Becky yesterday. She's so busy with getting the two boys ready

for school, starting a new job, and going into the bachelors program (ed. major), plus Trenton David's

birthday, and her wedding anniversary......all falling inside of several days. Phew...... Makes me

tired just thinking about it all !!. Good luck in the upcoming school year.

PEACE AND COMFORT TO ALL INDIGOS.

Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry

[Mermaid Tears]

Sherry....a special Thank you to you.....maybe you knew in some deep part of your heart that many would need you on this site...like Dee...and many others that have been 'with us' for so long....I call each of you..'our Guides'....yes...we new ones need your guidance...your knowledge..your wisdom...that 'helping hand' to reach down and pick us up....you walk ahead of us on this path...where there is no map....you speak the foreign language that we only recognize. Each of you must have known you would be needed...and you have certainly filled an empty heartbroken hole in our lives.

[Guest Trista's_Mom]

Hi everyone. I stopped in to read today. I am going through so many things right now. Too many to even process. All these things happening while I'm still in so much pain. I can't write much but wanted to say thank you to everyone who is here giving each other what hope, peace, love, and encouragement they can. Being able to come here helps so much. Thinking of you all.

Shannon

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

Shannon, holding you up in prayer...hugs to you...

[Jeff's Mom]

Shannon, thinking of you tonight. Hold on...tomorrow is another day. Sending "HUGS" your way. Kate

[shellykut]

Shannon - sending hugs and prayers this new morning.

Thinking of all Indigos and wishing you a peaceful day.

[Guest]

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[ericasmom]

Good morning Everyone. I hope the full moon we had this week shined on you and reflected the love all around you.

I had a lovely evening when Jonathan, Shannon, and Erica came over for dinner. I splurged and bought prepared foods from Whole Foods and made a big salad. After working like a crazy woman all week, it felt good to not cook. Baby Love is gorgeous and funny and happy. I adore her, her smile fills me up. She rolls over now from back to tummy. She will be baptized with her cousin Lucia on Sunday. Little Loves. I love seeing my Son as a Daddy, his heart so full and his loving so clear. And Shannon as this woman who knows her Daughter so well. I remember those days of tracing the faces of my babies and making up songs to quietly sing to them before nap time or any old time. I hope I always will remember.

It is a lovely morning though the heat will begin tomorrow and by Monday, first day of school with the kids, it will be around 93, and for the remainder of the week, it is going to be in the 90's. Our classrooms are at least 5 degrees warmer than outdoors. It has been blissfully cool this August, but it just stands to reason that it will bake that first week of school. Poor kids, getting used to a schedule in the hot hot classroom. I only have 18 kids so far on my list, it grew by 2 yesterday.

Shannon, hang on, the weight of grief is mighty and when those layers of shock wear away it leaves our wounds exposed to new pain. WE hold you.

Sherry, I am glad that your Mom will be settled in a new place that she can live with more ease and peace of mind to you and Sis.

Lora, what a great way to honor Cara and give help and assistance to those in need. She is smiling on you for this act of goodness.I did that with my Mom's clothing when she died, to a women's shelter for abused women. Eri's clothes were distributed to her friends and cousins. I kept a few key pieces, prom dress, graduation dress, the dress and shoes she wore to my wedding...

Leah, great to see you, I know you are carrying on with your very busy life of caretaker to so many, but I do wish you a few hours a day of peaceful repose.

A good day to All, check in later.

[ericasmom]

Attaching a photo or two of my little Love. We'll see if it works. Husband holding Erica, she was 3 months here.

Son holding his Daughter and she is 4 months here.

[ericasmom]

Love this one.

[Guest Trista's_Mom]

Good Morning.

Thank you to everyone for the kind words. It has just been an overwhelming time. The sadness surrounding the time of year, and as Dee said, I am now dealing with all these emotions without the protection of all those layers of shock. Lora,

I think your plan to donate Cara's clothes is a wonderful way to honor her. When I read it I cried. I cried for you because I can imagine how hard this is and I cried for me because I know it's something I will have to think about some day.

Dee,

I'm glad you had a nice time last night with family. The pictures of Erica are so precious. What a lovely little girl!

Becky,

Thank you for sharing your poems. I know some on here have seen them but they are so very heartfelt and helpful for those of us who are new here.

Wishing a beautiful Saturday to all.

[ericasmom]

Shannon, You know in your heart that you have tried, and it sounds like your husband did try but it just isn't enough and like you said, if it is weak prior to a tragedy of such huge proportions, it likely won't get stronger, at least not right now. I wish you peace in this decision as you don't need to put energy into something more right now.

I keep forgetting to say what I remember saying many times and it is was born from this time of year 10 years ago for me...When the seasons change that first year especially but certainly ongoing through the years, the fact that the trees and weather are changing without your Child here is really alarming and causes such an off-kilter feeling...how can time move on, how will snow fall if she/he is not here to see it? It brings forth so very much and I say it so that you can rest knowing we have all gone through these transformations too, the sadness that may come from it but also eventually, the faith that can come from seasonal change. I remember feeling joyous at the seasons' change later on because it affirmed that the order in the world is mostly on cue, and that I could walk under the skies of each season knowing that Eri delighted in the changes from her new home.

Be kind to your wounded spirits Indigos, know that your Children want you to live your very best lives in their light. It will be hard to find that best-life thing, it is elusive and it takes time, but you will find it through the hardest work of your lives.

[Jeff's Mom]

Dee, nothing brings a smile to my face faster then that of a baby. She is adorable. And so are the proud family. Shannon, I am so sorry that on top of your loss you are having to endure relationship problems. Holding you close and thinking of you today. Love, Kate

[ericasmom]

Thanks Kate and Shannon, I agree that Erica Elizabeth is gorgeous.

Letting Go

The cost of letting go is the unknown depth of the fall.

How will one land and what from that time before the fall, will be in-tact?

Salvaged?

What memories survive

which ones are sacrificed-

and what about those that resurface, changed and different?

Are those memories real?

Once we let go- what is the cost of adaptation?

Living for a time as a stranger even to oneself,

missing parts of a once-upon-a-time life and making due somehow

with the remains of the day,

and more days,

knitted together to form a new story and a new time.

[Mermaid Tears]

yes.....

[Mermaid Tears]

I needed to see that pink future Miss America....this morning....thanks for sharing Dee....I am so far away from the new little man in my life...2 1/2 hours if the traffic is normal....and going through Houston is always 'abnormal'.....I live in the same town with 4 GRANDchildren...well...Austin just moved to Austin, Tx....but what a difference in the relationship between GRANDchild and GRANDparent when we live close by....if there was anytime I needed to have a little one with me it is now....

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

sorry double post

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

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[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

Living for a time as a stranger even to oneself...

I do so agree, my husband says the same...we lost part of ourselves with Jesse...

All I see is a very sad woman...I had someone today ask me if I was sick...

I just said "Yes, I am sick...." that is all I could say...

[Jeff's Mom]

Laurie, we are having very hot weather for us. Hot and humid. In fact there is a humidex and severe weather warning right now. Yes, our leaves are slowly starting to turn yellow, etc. Mostly the underbrush and low lying grasses and bushes. I can't believe that we are now entering the fall season. My husband has another four sessions of three days each to go. He goes into the hospital for five hours on the Wednesday and then returns home with a chemo pump for a further 48 hours. It is the week following his chemo that his white blood cell count drops and he becomes quite ill. We are remaining as positive as we can and keeping our prayers said that this will have a positive outcome. Following the chemo he will have another colonoscopy and further MRI and tests. I will say that earlier today I felt as many are on the site right now. Bummed out. I gave myself a good talking too and told myself that I need to keep strong and pull myself up by the boot straps. We are both grateful for each and every day that we are able to spend together. I know it would be easy to sink into a depression and a feeling of anger. Time is precious and I won't use this time in a negative way. Although truth be told there are a few family members that have let us down terribly. In truth I could wipe the floor with them. At this point we have determined that they are a total write off. Yes, we do find out what kind of mettle we are made of when we face adversity. I can say this much...we all have family...but I will now call them relatives. Family care. Relatives are bound by genetics. One day they will learn when it is their turn. For now I need to stay focused on a positive future. Must get moving. The storm has come. Love to all, Kate

[Mermaid Tears]

Thought I would post the photos of the furniture I 'tiled and hand painted' for my GRANDson, Austin to take to his apartment in Austin, Tx.

I bought the '50's' telephone table at a garage sale...the corner table at a thrift store....they have been in my garage 'forever'.....

I woke up one morning with the thoughts in my mind...'that my creativity would be one important factor' that would save myself from falling in myself....and when I am creating...I feel like I am at least 50 %....

[Mermaid Tears]

I had these wood cubes in the garage...so...I tiled the top and bought black fabric bins...great storage....

This is the drawing desk my Dad gave to me....I have created many things on this....time to pass it on...I bought a plexi glass top and had holes drilled in corners....then I put some 'memory items' on top and then screwed it down tight.....Austin is a much better artist than I am....he will carry on the tradition just fine....

So thankful I can be busy...and pass things on...I guess we all reach our own 'timing' when that should be....

[Mermaid Tears]

just a thought....when getting Austin off...I thought of the parents that won't be sending their child off for that adventure...

One of my GRANDsons is starting his Senior year....and I thought of the parents that won't have that child making that milestone...

I have another way of 'thinking' now....

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

.

[JD's Mom, Becky]

Wow, Susan! You read my mind! Just posted this on my FB yesterday...

Everybody posting pics of their kids starting school.... my baby would have been a senior this year. Miss you so much Jared. I see some of your school mates, and they look sooo grown, makes me wonder what you would have looked like by now. Love U Infinity, my son.

This was his last school picture taken. It was about a year (2010) before the crash that took him from us, and he had just cut his hair to fit his football helmet. By the summer of 2011, it had grown back and he had started to braid it again.

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

Becky, very nice picture of Jared...

Thanks for sharing...it is an honor to learn more about your son...

[Jeff's Mom]

Shannon, you are in my thoughts and prayers, holding you and Trista close to my heart. I had a hard time at back to school last year, Cara would have started college and she would have loved it. It all seemed so unfair, we have lost our child and our future and theirs. In the beginning of my journey, I would get angry when someone would say you have an angel, I wanted my daughter back, time helps with everything.

Laurie, thank you for being so caring even in your own pain, the best part about this site is we all get it. Holding you and Jesse close to ny heart.

Susan, thank you for the poem and the encouraging words.

Becky, thank you for sharing the poem.

Dee and Sherry, as always thank you for continuing to be here. Even though we have to go through all these ups and down, you give us support and hope.

Kate, thinking of you and Ross.

Shelly, thinking of you and thank you for your support.

Found a wonderful place to give Caras clothes to. It is a youth shelter and I will be taking them there next week, with a few things of Jared's that he did not want anymore. It is hard but knowing these will benefit troubled and lost teens would make Cara very happy, she loved to help people.

Thank you all for being here and have a good day.

Lora, you gave from your heart as hard as it was. My son worked for an employment agency for street people. They were people that had just come out of prison, or just wanted a temporary place to work. They often found themselves displaced. He also saw much of the hard side of life. Truth be told he also saw the bad side of reality to people that had worked hard and found themselves on the down and out. Job losses, etc. he always looked into the heart. He saw each person as an individual. He gave them respect and asked for the same in return. He made many friends. When he died I did the same thing. I packed his clothes to give to people that could use them. I hope you will find comfort in doing this as hard as it is.

[daveydow1]

Lora-----I, too, share your bittersweet feelings of giving dear Cara's clothing

to the youth shelter. I know that it pulls at the heart to part with those

things that are so personal. I gave many of David's clothes to the local

Salvation Army thrift store a few months after he passed.....it was difficult.

Surely, some young lady at the youth shelter will feel better about herself

when she is given a nice item of clothing to wear, and it just might help

lift her spirits and give her the will to go on, and thrive. Sometimes it's the

little things that may seem insignificant, that really do help. Peace to you.

Becky----thanks for the pic of dear J.D. He certainly is a handsome young man.

Susan----thanks for your kind words, friend. The hand-painted furniture

that you created from ordinary items shows that you have an immense talent

for creating art. (I dabble a bit with painting).....not that good....but I, too, find

that creating something is very uplifting. On this rough journey we're on, we

need all the help we can get, and creating something (whatever it may be),

with our own hands can lift the spirits.

Kate-----

Good that you are keeping positive, although I know it must be difficult

at times. Continuing to send prayers for your husband's health.

Laurie----It is nice to see all the changes in nature out here in the country.

We have a small farm, but it is right in the middle of an area of many large

farms of crops and dairy operations. Soon the harvesting will begin, and our

lovely 10 ft. high green 'fence' surrounding us (the cornfields), will come down.

Dee----thanks for your poem...."Letting Go". Such wise words. The line 'living as

a stranger....even to oneself' is so true. Sometimes, even after these 10 years

have passed, we still may wonder who we have become, and have to stop and

re-evaluate our lives and the adjustments we have had to make on this journey.

Thanks for the pics of little Erica. She is so CUTE. Her baptism will be a special

occaision for all, and ERi wil surely be smiling down on her little niece and the

family. On the subject of fall,......end of summer. Yes---I agree.....there is something

quite melancholy about the change. I call it the sorrow of fall. Something sorrowful

about a lovely garden of flowers....all going into a decline.....leaving. We wonder

how something so lovely can fade away like that. Of course that is how it is with

the change of seasons....( and life...as we Indigos know).

Shannon and Shelly-----Thinking of you.

PEACE AND COMFORT TO ALL INDIGOS.

Davey&Lisasmom, Sherry

[JD's Mom, Becky]

Dee, that is the most beautiful baby! Warms my heart just looking at her!!

Susan, boy oh boy, you have all kinds of talents!! That furniture looks terrific, and I know it will be appreciated! How special is that??

Shannon, I am so sorry for all you are going through. We are holding on to you, and you're in our prayers.

Kate, God has given you a special kind of strength to deal with all you have on your plate right now, and know that we are here for you always. My son also had a heart for people less fortunate, and tried to do whatever he could to help. He was very protective of some of his friends that were from broken homes and 'different' lifestyles than our own.

Laurie, your post about being your son's voice has inspired me! That is the same way we feel about justice for our son. I am praying daily for that to happen.

Lora, hang in there, dear friend, this is still so fresh for you and many here, and many of us know that crushing feeling that it will never be any better, but from my experience, I am able to navigate for longer periods of time before I break down. Those markers of time can be so devastating. It's ok, it really is. Everybody does this at their own pace.

Sherry, I always feel akin to you, as our boys lost their lives because of the carelessness of someone else. As I draw closer and closer to the deadline, the statute of limitations, I have had to contemplate how I will feel if there is no justice. This is a path I know you have already walked, and I appreciate you being here.

Gretchen? Shelly? Carol? Betty? I pray you are all well.

[Jeff's Mom]

"If , instead of a gem or even a flower, we could cast the gift of a lovely thought...into the heart of a friend, that would be giving like the angel's." G. MacDonald...I read this today in the memorials in our newspaper. Sending warm and peaceful wishes to all of you for a restful sleep tonight. May your child send you a sense of comfort. Hold tight to the wonderful memories that remain. Kate

[M.Mata77]

Thoughts and prayers to my cousin and his little boy. This poor 2 year old baby was savagely beaten by his mothers boyfriend. He is now in the hospital fighting for his life.

[Mermaid Tears]

Mata.....I 'hear' and 'read' this horror story over and over and over in the news....of a 'boyfriend' that abuses, beats and murders innocents...I have and will send out prayers for the child...I think prayers are so powerful you don't have to have a name...I will pray that the family can come together and do all they can to bring this man to a place of justice....and not rest til he is in a place where he cannot harm others.

[Mermaid Tears]

Once again....right at my doorstep...entering the door to my conflicted spirit of Faith.....'WHY'....why not take a man that does things like that...?? WHY take my son...who would do anything in his power to protect an innocent ?? Very deep....it goes so deep within me.

I have to remember my Grama saying...'You can either be better...or be bitter...the choice is yours'.

And I would like to answer her.....'OK...I'm game...tell me how'.....

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

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[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

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[Mermaid Tears]

Thank you, Laurie....for sharing that moment and kindness of Jesse's life and heart....I have many of John David....many I knew...many I found out after his passing....there is that pride in our hearts that still beats for our boys were gallant..giving..brave...considerate and had that gentleman's heart...thank you for sharing your knowledge...it helps that we share 'what we know'...much like women would share in the neighborhoods years ago...a cup of sugar...a cup of flour. We know we raised them right...for after they left their childhood's home....we always knew....they would do the 'right thing'. Once again.....I feel like I am in some kind of classroom...to learn some lesson...it is still out of reach...but I still have the desire to learn. The ground under my feet is really shifting today.

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

sorry double post..

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

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[Guest Trista's_Mom]

double post

[Guest Trista's_Mom]

double post

[Guest Trista's_Mom]

Aiden asked me today if he could water Sissy's flowers. They needed some water anyway so I gave him the hose and let him do it. He got really excited and said, "Look, Mommy! I made a rainbow for Sissy's garden!". I've seen some small rainbows when watering but never anything like this. I feel like Trista knew we needed a rainbow today and this was the only way to send one.

Just minutes after I wrote this, I went outside to sit and think. I was, of course, thinking of Tris and saw a shooting star. I just know she is with me and supporting me through this.

[Mermaid Tears]

Shannon...saying a prayer for you and yours...more later when I have more time...you are in the driver's seat...hands on the wheel...

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

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[daveydow1]

Shannon----After reading your post about your family problems with your husband,

I am so sorry that you have to suffer this additional burden. Your mother-in-law

has certainly not helped your husband by being an enabler to his drug problem.

Covering up a drug problem never helps the addicted one to recover......it just

prolongs the problem. She is wrong to blame all this on you......it's another way

of enabling the addicted one.....and strange that as a professional in that field, she

does not carry through with that knowledge. But sometimes people can be

blinded when it comes to family members who need help. Of course, you already know this to be true.

The rainbow from the water hose was such a lovely thing, and sweet Trista must have been

smiling down when she sent it to you and the boys. Sending continued prayers

for you and your two sons. Peace to you, friend.

Becky----Yes...we do have a kinship regarding the way our dear children were

taken from this earth....by someone else's negligence. As the statute of limitations

in your state approaches, I hope that you will feel that you have fought a valiant

fight to bring justice for J.D. You have done so much more than I had done, really.

Sometimes it feels like battling a giant. ( I keep calling lawmakers whenever an issue

comes up that they would be voting on,... and writing letters to congressmen etc...my

small way of trying to bring changes.) You have done everything that you could

do, and I don't think that you have left any 'stone unturned' in your quest. Sometimes

the powers that be just don't want to hear the changes that could, and should, be

made. I have found that out too. I read an article the other day in the newspaper

that addressed sleepy truck drivers. It said that 19 truckers died each year in sleepy

trucking accidents. It failed to mention the glaring fact that close to 5,000 drivers

of automobiles die in accidents where they have been hit by huge rigs. I just keep

praying that the laws in your state will address the speed limits in residential areas.

Peace & comfort to you.

m.mata-----

So sorry to hear of the poor little child's beating at the hands of his

mother's boyfriend. As someone else said.......it's in the papers & on the news all

the time. I, too, hope that the monster who did this to this little boy will get a heavy

sentence for his brutality. Sending prayers for the child's recovery.

Must go now......lots of things to take care of today.

PEACE TO ALL INDIGOS.

[JD's Mom, Becky]

Got permission today from property owners on the corner of the main road and our road to place our second slow down sign!! This is an answer to prayer!!

[Mermaid Tears]

I touched on the subject of drugs and addiction in a post a long time ago...my first husband went into the Drug Bureau and then the DEA...drugs are everywhere and there is so much money in it...now it will never go away....he, too, even took them..that is another story. I left him.

In 2000 I went to a social gathering and met a man that had worked at some very famous research hospitals...they were trying to find 'anything' to cure addiction. He said there were drugs out there that will alter the brain's chemistry in such a way....there was no going back. The brain was forever changed....the addicted one...forever chained. He said they just didn't have a 'pill' in the medicine chest to fix it. In his quest he interviewed many...addicted ones and ones that had been able to recover...the tests showed that even ones that had been clean for years...if they showed anything related to drugs...alcohol...their brains would show up as full blown addiction...(this was during tests). He also said he had been an atheist for years and years...but he was now a Christian....because he went into a full research of those that had recovered and found that when they went to AA or NA and found that Higher Power....only then could they turn around and find recovery. He said he wanted to have that, too.

That was his story....Shannon....you are up against something that you simply have no control over. You are right. There is nothing you can 'do' for him....but to tell him that you and the children love him...and you have not turned your backs on him....only to the addiction. You must tell his Mother the same thing. It is hard...the old saying...'don't throw the baby out with the dirty bath water'.....it is something the same way. It makes one make some hard choices.....and I, too, can only urge you in a loving way....to find help with this. It could be one of the many that he has seen in the past....or call the treatment facility where he went....FOR YOU to get advice.....there are many that can walk and talk you through this.....and there are many 'past addicts' that can help you find your 'right' way in this. They are the ones that understand how it can cut right through a family....and they can best tell you what you need to hear. I can only support you on this site. Many will support you. Many that have this heavy grief also have other issues in their life that just breaks ones heart.

You are up against it little girl....you do have a very wise mind...(even if at times you feel you are losing it)....you have your other children around you and you need to think what is best for them and you at this time...(and you are).....you are having to face all this with one foot on the ground...the other foot trying to find that path.....that new 'normal'...and many here will be praying for you. We know how hard it is to have this grief and have to deal with hard issues.

There are worse things than being alone....I found that out when I left my first husband.

I will also tell you what my Grama told me over and over ever since I was 10 years old..."Remember, you are Maggie the cat...you will always land on your feet"......I hope that can give you a small little lift....although in the past year....I have been on my knees more than my feet....it makes me smile to remember her always saying that to me.

I loved that rainbow....your little boys have you circled in their love...and Trista is sending you healing through them and her 'signs'....children are always closer to the Spirit.....

[Mermaid Tears]

Hooray for you, Becky....yes....this has been 'the years of unanswered questions...and answered prayers..."......

Dee...hope the first day of school goes great for you and the students...