Members mielhall Posted February 2, 2013 Members Report Share Posted February 2, 2013 My beautiful wife left us 3 weeks ago today. She was literally my "better half". I am finding that without her, the better part of me, there is nothing left but an empty, useless, shell. I can't get motivated to do much of anything. I rarely get more than one thing done in a day, mainly just sit in my chair and try to keep my emotions in check and read. I've been to a support group but need to get my but in gear and start doing things. Anyone got any ideas to get me motivated? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators widower2 Posted February 2, 2013 Moderators Report Share Posted February 2, 2013 I'm very sorry for your loss. I don't know about motivating, but I do think you may be really underestimating how much time this will take. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Sounds like you're doing "fine" all things considered. Best to you - Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Caremal Posted February 2, 2013 Members Report Share Posted February 2, 2013 MIE Hang in there Time helps the pain to lessen - for me almsot 10 months it is extremely difficult to deal with. I am so alone and yet i am wanting to want to move on and I can not seam to do it. I know this for sure that THIS SITE is one of the BEST things I have found. The chat room is a great place for me to spend time - I do not feel alone when I am on there with others. When reading the posts it helps me to know I am not alone and to see how others manage. I know I have received so much support from others who have been in our shoes. I think of this place as a place to get support when needed and to give it when you can. come back and spend time with people who understand what it is like to loose someone so special.sending you a special hug.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mielhall Posted February 2, 2013 Author Members Report Share Posted February 2, 2013 Thanks for the help. I understand the marathon/sprint analogy, but realize that one must MOVE to run a marathon. My sister-in-law suggested I take up a new hobby. Maybe by doing something we didn't do together would help me into this new phase of my life. Just sitting in this chair isn't healthy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members llovern Posted February 2, 2013 Members Report Share Posted February 2, 2013 MIE, I understand your concern about not being motivated to do much of anything. Given that you lost your wife only three weeks ago, I think you are probably doing the best you can. There is no set pattern of what a person may experience when grieving. Every person grieves in a different way. Any and all feelings are normal. I think it is very good though that you are wanting to be more productive. Just be sure to give yourself time. I think your sister-in-law's suggestion is a good one if you can find a hobby that you like. I already had a hobby that I enjoy a lot and that has helped me a great deal. When I am busy working on projects, I am totally absorbed in what I am doing and it is a break from feeling sad, lonely and lost.Being here on this site is a big plus too. It really helps to be with people who understand what you are feeling and everyone here is so supportive. Wishing the best for you. Take Care.Linda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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