i don't know how i have any more tears left

[gunnerswife]

I don't sleep good i wake up upset, so i worked this morning and just took a nap i wake up and sit here crying my eyes out. I miss hubby so much. it isn't fair he is gone. He said we would grow old together and when he seen a old couple he would say that was us in like 20 years, well it will never happen now.

[MemphisMargaret]

Same here....We married 11 years ago and when I first met my husband, he brought this little resin old couple from a souvenir shop that were sitting in beach chairs...that was our goal...to get old and sit on a chair at the beach. We even used the old couple as the top of our weddding cake. I am on week 2 of being back at work. I guess it is good for me to occupy my mind with although my thoughts travel to my husband several times during the day and the day just drags on and on. Yesterday I was already to come home and tell him about my day only he wasn't here. Tonight, I just miss him so much and I don't want to do anything. I don't really even want to go to work. I would just rather sit here and look at pictures and watch movies.

I don't sleep good i wake up upset, so i worked this morning and just took a nap i wake up and sit here crying my eyes out. I miss hubby so much. it isn't fair he is gone. He said we would grow old together and when he seen a old couple he would say that was us in like 20 years, well it will never happen now.

[widower2]

I'm so sorry for you both. I know what those nights (and days) can be like. It's a rough sea you're navigating, but you can do it, impossible as it may seem....

[arnoldsmb]

I too cry alot. Sometimes I will be doing ok and then there will be a thought or smell or something I can't even put my finger on and I will

begin crying. It is so hard some days to make it through the day. I have begun writing in a journal and sometimes when I begin to cry I will

try writing down everything that I am feeling and thinking. Sometimes that helps me. This is so very painful and I wish no one ever had to

feel this pain. I will be thinking of you and hope you find some solace even if for just a little while.

Shay

[Mdanielson4]

Crying clenses the soul, so I have been told. Tears will revive themselves and crying will help you heal... I am telling you, I have very rarely cryed in the past. Since my wife died I cannot control my emotions. today driving back from the airport I cryed again and again. I miss my wife more than I ever dreamed I could. In some ways I don't want it to stop because I feel it shows how much I care. on another hand, would she want me to act this way? Sorry I don't have the answer to that question.

The answer to this post is tears help you heal.

Mike

[gunnerswife]

It hurts to cry. it hurts to not cry. so what should i do? you guys are the only ones that knows the pain i am in. others acts like get over it already.

[ericadc2]

I have been wondering the same thing too...how many more tears do I have left?? I feel like they should have all been gone by now as many as I have cried! I lost my husband and it's been 3 wks now but it still seems like yesterday...I don't want to live without him and I am so very lonely...I keep catching myself wanting to call him to tell him something one of the girls have done, but then it's like a knife in my chest when I realize I can't do that because he is no longer here! I can't stand the pain and I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. I cry constantly when I am alone and I don't think there is an answer on how much one can cry. If you feel like crying then that's what you should do. Maybe it will help the healing process like people say it does. I am new to this too so I don't know if any of this helps or not. And I agree with you when you say that it isn't fair that he is gone and he said you would grow old together because that's how I feel as well. Take care.

[gunnerswife]

Theres many more tears left in you because yours just happened mine happened June 21, and i can still cry. i said i can't sleep, i can't eat but i sure can cry.

[drinwi]

I don't know how to post here but I want to reply to this thread.

I lost my husband on 9/2/2012 at 10:39pm. We had been married 4 months to the day. I am 51, and this was my second marriage. He was my heart, my true soul mate, he restored my faith in being loveable, and was part of my healing after the devastation of divorce after a 30 year marriage. He was the light, the laughter, the best gift ever given to me.

He had some surgery Friday, Aug 31, it went extremely well. Once he was out of recovery and in his regular room we chatted, kissed, and then he had 2 massive strokes. He never regained consciousness again. I stayed with him for the next two days, my family, and closest friends joined me. On Sunday night, my brother, and his closest friend stood with me as he took his final breath. I wept and thanked him for loving me so well, for always telling me I was his number 1, for keeping his promise to always pursue me, protect me, and love me. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do but I won't ever regret being there with him as he crossed the finish line.

Today I am an emotional wreck, I have cried rivers, I am anxious, I am not sleeping well, and I hate all of this. I want to hurry it up, and I want to be able to breathe without a shudder, and I want my brain and my body to realize and accept that he won't come through the door anymore.

All of that to say, that I hate this. So because I don't know how to make an original post, I replied here. I hope to gain some support and some courage from those of you that have gone before me on this journey.