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Losses From Long Ago


mofirefly

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I am only trying to start a topic where others who wish to post about losses from long ago might not continue to see posts from unknown places about drugs.  A question I'll put out here for any to consider responding to is what time frame makes a loss qualify for being long ago???  Even tho it's been almost 2 1/2 years since I lost my mom in a car accident which is longer than someone who is in the first few hours...I can't think of my loss as being long ago - for there are many days still that if I'm not careful, I'm right back remembering every detail for that day....but I have read here or somewhere that I shouldn't "stay so long in the past that the furture is gone before I get there".  May all who post here take care.

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Feb 13th my dad had been gone 28yrs.  My baby brother (51) and I were 24 and 25 when he passed in recovery after a lengthy bypass surgery.  For both of us it was as if it was yesterday.  We have lost our mum and our sons since dad died and I guess with each loss the pain is revisted and of course revived.

As for long ago......with each death of my closest, I feel that long ago isn't really far away.........

Blessed be Trudi

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Mofirefly me also. I go back to when my mom first past away often as if that will help me to be close to her again. I know your pain, you aren't alone. I often feel helpless to bring her back. She past over 2 years ago but i don't feel any closer to healing now than i did on day one. I guess after you have someone with you for all of your life it's a very hard thing to let go, isn't it ? I have thought also about attending a grief therapy group. I may do that in order to just sit and vent more, it seem's like that is what help's me the most is to sit and vent and let it all out when i can.

Peace, Angel. 

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Angell 44 - I too sometimes wish I could sit and talk about my mom and the accident with others, but those around me seem to think that's "old" news and it must bother them, because they still apparently just don't get it that the hole inside of me is and always will be there and that for me venting helps - why can't they just listen instead of giving me advice????  Take care!

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[user=15510]mofirefly[/user] wrote:

Angell 44 - I too sometimes wish I could sit and talk about my mom and the accident with others, but those around me seem to think that's "old" news and it must bother them, because they still apparently just don't get it that the hole inside of me is and always will be there and that for me venting helps - why can't they just listen instead of giving me advice????  Take care!

 

I agree with you so much. They feel like that's old new's now so move on. The hole inside of me is still very much open and raw. And yes mine will always be there to. And the venting for me helps so much, i don't know what i would have done without being able to do at least that much to you ladie's here. It is so good to just have people listen to me also instead of giving me advice. I just have one family member who live's far away who know's how to comfort me and who tries to at all. She is alway's kind to me and supportive.  I have lived in the same place for many year's now with my mother until she passed on and still after I am still here to, so I feel safe here. But even with that I would love to move to where this other family is at, it is warm there in the winter, but the summer's are way to hot. And I have another family member here who needs me for now as he is ill a lot and is elderly. I may go and visit there soon where my other family member is at. If i go and look around and find cheap but decent housing I may go there. Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. 

If you ever need to vent email me I am here if you need me. I know how you feel. Peace, Angel.

 

 

 

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Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields

- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.

- Facebook and Twitter Integration

- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"

- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.

- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board

- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it.

- Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible.

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other.

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com.

Kelly Baltzell, MA

CEO/President

Beyond Indigo Family

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