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hikinmike

Screeching Halt

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For about three years i was sole caregiver as my wife's illness progressed and she deteriorated more and more. Family and friends were in touch by phone and Facebook, but all had their own concerns, and the care-giving was mine, supplemented by occasional home health care checkup visits. Then one day she wound up in ICU on a ventilator, and within a month was dead in a hospice bed. Years of focus, duties, support, maintenance, etc. all came to a screeching halt. That was July of 2011, and I'm still having some difficulty adjusting to a life without all those demand. At times i was overwhelmed by the demands (especially having rheumatoid arthritis and hurting all the time myself). But now that intense demand is gone and I'm often at loose ends. Strange days, those of the first year.

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Derry   

Thank you for sharing your story.

My story has similarties and I wondered about that "screeching halt" feeling.

I cared for my mother for 17 years......the last 3 years being full time around the clock...with no help

I also had problems with arthritis and was in a wheel chair for 9 months....It's unbelievable what we can do when we must.

Looking back at how stressful it was, I wonder if a "screeching halt" was the only GOOD way to stop??

I hope and pray that you are feeling a bit better and life is moving toward normal....a new normal....it will never be the same.

Blessings,

Derry

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widower2   

I'm sorry for both of you. Mine was "only" a little over a year and really not a full time, had to do everything for her kind of thing until the last 6 months ish. Still I was doing that and only that for that time and between that and her passing and then looking for a job......bottom line it's been nearly a year (which I can't believe) and I'm only starting to get back into anything resembling a "normal" life.

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I'm in the caregiving stage right now. But I was sort of making plans for the time after this (such as taking a class here at home). What do you people think?

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