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    • ModKonnie

      Advertisements   09/05/2017

      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie
kelly

I Believe There Isn't a God...

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neveragain, I know what losing our children means. I understand losing your son as you have. I'm deeply sorry. We are both more than what a forum could make us appear. I'm a pro musician and I love old Vettes. My world is my family. I fly the flag and the Navy Jack. My son, daughter, and son in law are Navy. I'm proud of them. Jenni is my firstborn, October 16, 1974. I still see her sometimes, like on her birthday or angelday. May you have peace my friend. Mark

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My son took a shower, shaved with the new razor I bought him for his 17th birthday, put on his best clothes that he bought for the upcoming ROTC military dance, asked the neighbor for a jump for his truck, drove to a parking lot and text messaged his friends to say goodbye, put the gun he stole from the house to his head and put a bullet in his brain........... I have read a lot of books since he died 6 months ago; some religious and some not. I read the short story called, THE MAN WHO DIED by D.H.LAWRENCE also published with the name THE ESCAPED COCK. I found great comfort in this story. It is a wonderful mix of religion and atheism. Neveragain.

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neveragain, words can never say what I feel. I am so deeply sorry. It's good to find comfort in something like a book. We can read it again and again. I'm sure you're very proud of him. We have such pride in them when they begin training to become officers. It's a special time. My younger daughter, who recently gave birth, is now a Lieutenant in the Navy.

Jenni was in college studying to be a teacher. She loved working with children. She stopped at the ocean on her way home after the end of her third year with two friends. Jenni walked back to her Camaro for cigarettes and disappeared. Her friends found her bikini covered in blood and called the police. We didn't find out who took her life until her killer was arrested and confessed to her death. I don't want any revenge. I just want Jennifer home.

I'm leaving in the morning for a recording session, which means I get some leisure time for shopping and reading. Maybe I'll see if I can find one of the books you mentioned. They sound very interesting. Take good care of yourself. I'll be home Thursday. Check in with you then. Mark

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Friend, I dont usually read books twice because I believe a book has energy and when its absorbed by the reader all that is left is bones. I apologies to all the writers out there that may be offended. Your horrific tragedy does not give you insight to my feelings, and you should be glad of that. I am not proud I am crushed. My wife is broken, my daughter is damaged, my life could be described as hell. Im not going anywhere, nor am I shopping, or bragging on my good fortunes. If I had someone to blame for this, I would hunt them down and cut out there heart. My son wont be coming home. I wont see him again, I hate most everyone, and I dont love Jesus. Neveragain.

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Neveragain,     On 8-13-2007  I lost my husband to a heartattack.  we didn't believe in god either (I still don't).   It's nice to see that there are others out there who feel the same way.  I don't know your story but I respect you for your feelings and am very sorry for your loss.  Sometimes it's hard to talk with some of these people because they believe in god.  They don't want to or can't understand grieving without him.  Thanks for listening,  pamhadfred

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Thank you, Im sorry for your loss. The hard part of talking to believers is that they dont really want to, or cant, listen. They seem to just wait for their next chance to make their point. I have no secondary agenda, except finding like minded people to grieve with. I dont care if I convert anyone to atheism. To me you are what you are and your not what your not... When I was younger I didnt think about it much, but with modern communication being what it is, and able to show us the world around us in real time, its hard to figure why anyone would lie to themselves about anything. Understand that I am having a hard time right now. Its close to fathers day and had to pick up my sons year book that had a page set aside just for him. I feel safe in this forum, even though it kind of misrepresents my reason for being here. I kept finding myself not wanting to stress anybody out, everyone here has suffered enough. I dont want to make it worse for anyone. I dont have the stomach for lying about how I feel. Here I hope to talk to people that are non-believers because to me religion hurts, I can find no compassion in it. Thank you again for your kind words, and am glad to meet you. Neveragain

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Yes,  this place is to talk about loss but it's also a place of hating and discriminating of other peoples. opinions. Maybe if people lisstened more and talked less,  the world would be a better place. People seem to like this thread otherwise they wouldn't come here.

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I have learned some things since my only son died. Compassion and love, do not belong to any, thing or religion, but is our birth right if we so choose... Anytime somebody ropes off an area, and than proclaims that, the area roped off, contains all you need and hope for; I usually take off the other way before I get snared... I will not, pay an admission price to live my life. I will not, fear God to make myself feel safe. I will not lie to myself, to end my suffering, I will not, find sactuary with those who justify the suffering of others. I will never believe, in an angry God...I believe all people come from the same place into life, and go to the same place after life. A person needs no middle management, to communicate with and understand life... I miss my son so much... I loved him... His death is tragic and life changing... Only the mortal people understand...  I  feel that, after reading the entire Non-believers thread, that the "believers" seem to be stratigicaly thinning this thread out with tiresome arguments, and double spaced pages of bs.  Neveragain

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Hello Neveragain. I welcome you to the I Believe There Isn't A God Forum. I am so sorry for your devstating loss. My heart goes out to you. You chose the correct forum to express your specific belief system. This forum was specifically created for those who suffered losses that are non-believing atheists. It's purpose is for like-minded people to gather (realizing we are not alone in our non-belief) sharing our thoughts, feelings and rejection of belief in the existence of any god or gods and how we cope with the loss of our loved ones. Regrettably, there are "believers" who refuse to stay on their own forum and intrude on our discussions by shamefully and inexcusably attempting to proselytize and convert us. Mark is the most guilty of these horrible actions. He has only caused me and other atheists more emotional pain with his pushy proselytizing attempts disrespecting our right to our non-belief (atheism). Neveragain, I hope to hear more from you and have lengthy discussions with you in the future. You and I have very similar beliefs. Because of this, I think we can provide each other with some comfort and understanding. In the meantime, I hope to hear far less from proselytizing "Believers" who don't belong posting on this forum. They ruin it for grieving atheists.

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Hello. Thank you. Sorry for your loss. Im not on the computer much anymore. My family is ok for now and my life force is starting to be felt again. Its kind of interesting how religion takes the things that belong to everyone and then sells them back to us in their own wrapper. I would like to talk about grieving without religion. Im beginning to think that most people understand clearly, that there is no god and make a concious choice to lie to themselves... That would explain why they always argue with the bible or whatever instead of using real life situations. To go on and on about life after death and how wonderful it can be is the cheapest con ever made...its amazing. Neveragain.

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kelly   

Guess who is traveling the farthest to our reunion?

It's Trudi.

Trudi is traveling all the way from Australia to Minneapolis, MN for our Beyond Indigo reunion in August!

If Trudi can make it, so can you! 

Come check our reunion page: http://www.beyondindigo.com/reunion/

Hope to see you there!

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kelly   

Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields

- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.

- Facebook and Twitter Integration

- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"

- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.

- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board

- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it.

- Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible.

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other.

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com.

Kelly Baltzell, MA

CEO/President

Beyond Indigo Family

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Hello. It's been a long time since I've posted here. It's a few weeks before my birthday March 27 and I'm feeling especially sad. The loss of my mom to cancer in September 2001 still hits me hard (especially during dates on the calendar like my birthday). Anyway, I've suffered more tragic losses since the last time I posted. A very special dog of mine that my mom bought for me several months before she died, I lost due to congestive heart failure in 2013. Also, just last year (2015), a co-worker of mine Who I had a great relationship with for many years was shockingly found dead in her home a year ago. While my mom's death was my ultimate heartbreaking tragedy, during my lifetime, I've had so many other tragedies that also broke my heart.

What continues to help me deal with all of this is my atheism. The concept of a God causing or letting my mother die of cancer and taking her away from me is too cruel and unbearable of a concept for me to ever live with. That goes for any and all deaths and tragedies. Since there is no proof of the existence of a God, I continue and will always live my life as an atheist. It's the only way that gives me any kind of peace of mind. Looking back at the previous pages of this thread, there were religious people who unnecessarily came on this thread and unnecessarily caused me more emotional pain. That should never have happened. At that time, this was the only grief support site that had a specific thread  "I believe there isn't a God" where someone who is an atheist can express themselves. It was supposed to be a safe haven for people like me. Unfortunately, I was bombarded with proselytizing, religious comments that all agnostics and atheists would find extremely offensive and only added to my depression. Again, it should never have happened. 

Fortunately, in 2011 a grief support site was created called Grief Beyond Belief by a wonderful woman named Rebecca Hensler. It is a completely faith-free community where no religious comments that offend all atheists and agnostics like me are allowed. No believers can post anything of a religious nature and no cruel attempts to proselytize are allowed. Moderators consistently monitor that site and delete all religious posts keeping it the one true safe-haven for grieving atheists that do not want any inconsiderate and unnecessary additional pain caused by a Christian's comments. That site was so badly needed. Atheists and agnostics lose loved ones too and the last thing we want to hear is preaching of a god, afterlife or prayers. Christians have no idea how offensive and hurtful those comments are to atheists. Those Christian actions causes conflicts and pain to people like me. Fortunately, that site is wonderfully moderated where attempts of Christian-religious-type posts are always deleted. In fact, if a specific person continues to post religious comments besides deleting the moderators ban them from the site. Grief Beyond Belief site truly protects the grieving atheist from additional harm. I wish this site was run that way. It would've spared me from having unnecessary additional pain added on to my severe depression. So many atheists like me desperately needs a grief support site that's faith-free where I can post my pain from loss combined with my atheism and never be scared of the unwelcome responses from Christians. That's probably why I see there hasn't been any activity in this forum for years. The atheists looking for grief support and want to express their thoughts and pain are probably posting on the Grief Beyond Belief site and is completely understandable. I read that site every day and the people there consistently express the same type of life philosophies, thoughts, and feelings that I do without hurtful responses I received here. I wish a site like that had existed in 2001 when I lost my mom. The Grief Beyond Belief Site is truly a breath of fresh air and I would highly recommend it to all grieving atheists. According to their rules, there is no way they will allow you to be hurt by Christian posters. While I will continue to post here, I really hope the moderators and people who run Beyond Indigo read my post and try to run this "I believe there isn't a God" forum similarly to how I described the Grief Beyond Belief Site is run. For grieving atheists like myself, it would be much appreciated.

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I always find some comfort in reading posts online from people who are atheists. It makes me feel like I'm not alone. I wish I could meet an atheist in person. In a new pew research study there is now 23% of the population in the United States that define themselves as non-religious so I know there are many atheists and agnostics out there. The problem is that Atheists remain in the closet for fear of being either discriminated against by Christians or attempts at unwanted proselytizing by Christians. I, myself, have never admitted my atheism in public for those very same fears. I hope someday, in my lifetime, that will change in the United States.

I also wish there were more secular funerals. Unfortunately, I have never gone to one. Every funeral I've ever been to have been filled with the God, prayer, bible, and afterlife ideology which has no meaning to me, provides me no comfort, and that I find personally extremely insulting, painful, and hurtful. Funerals should be about talking about the person who died. Telling wonderful stories about them. Talking about that person's wonderful qualities that made them so special. Talking about how much that person meant to you, how much you love them and will always miss them. That's the type of speech I made when I eulogized my mom in 2001. It was a speech that was totally secular that came straight from the heart. There were no references to any god, afterlife, or prayers that I had no proof of. My eulogy of my mom in 2001 I was very proud of. I wish all speeches at funerals were similar in nature. That way no divisive religious language is used and people who are grieving atheists are spared the discomfort and additional pain that religious preaching causes.

Actually, I don't just define myself as strictly an atheist. I was raised as a cultural and ethnic Jew. My Mother was Jewish. My Grandparents, Great-Grandparents, cousins and all relatives were Jewish so I come from a Jewish background. However, since I was a child, I rejected the religious aspects of Judaism while embracing the culture . In technical terms, I'm a Secular Humanistic Jew. That translation would be that I'm an Atheist Jew. I constantly call myself strictly an Atheist in my posts because if I bring my Judaism into the discussion people would get the false idea that I was religious when nothing could be further from the truth. I don't want any misunderstanding or confusion. In fact, I'm very proud to say that a high percentage of Jews call themselves Secular and reject God belief like I do. That's something I can always take comfort in. Rebecca Hensler, who started the wonderful Grief Beyond Belief Faith-Free Community Site has a cultural and ethnic Jewish background but totally rejects belief in any god or gods. She truly cares about helping grieving atheists like me. I wish others could follow her lead.

By the way, If anyone was curious as to how I decided on the Username Everlastinggodstopper, I will explain. Many years ago, I was on an atheist website where I saw someone with that username and was very impressed. In my perfect world of peace, there would be no such thing as God belief or religion. There is nothing more divisive and has caused more harm than religious beliefs. So, the name "God Stopper" just fit my world view.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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