Lost ball in high winds

[Sole-Mate]

It was on June 14, 2011 that Debra passed away after so many trips to the drs, hospitals, surgery rooms, etc. She made me promise two things: 1) I was to be there and it would be me to ensure that she lived a good quality of life; to ensure that she did not live on artificial means; and 2) I was to take care of our Husky and treat him kindly and support him thoroughly. I got the call while on deployment and she was given days and it took me 5 days to get home; she was there, I was there and she knew that I always kept my promises. I held her hand and she held mine as tightly as she could given her weakness. We agreed on the best way to support each other and my remote working provided her the best possible healthcare and the ability to stay at home to give her the best chance for extended life. It was hard to be apart, but she got the best care possible and I did get home a few times. The last time we were together we agreed that I should come home and we would figure out a better solution. I got a job at home but it was too late as she took a turn for the worse. You see, she did pass away in Arpil 09, but she was brought back to life. She told me she was ready and she had seen all she needed to see to know that there was peace in the light and it was an okay place for her to go home. She was around for another two years. But, I was there for her in all ways that I could given the situation. Her Great White Husky is finally taking a liking to me. He gives me purpose, right now, and I cannot let her down, but life has lost alot of meaning. I can certainly say that he gives me the reason to get up, go to work (it is new job that I took to take care of Debra and I do not like) and come home expeditiously everyday. But, there is alot of angst and hurt and wandering in my mind and heart since she was so dear to me and I had to let her go, hold her hand and watch the life leave her body. Her soul; her presence; her being were all such a gift to me. The time together I shall cherish forever, but it is still tough to make it each day and figure out the reasons for moving foreward. When it all gets to be too much, I look over at Bear and I can see that I need to be here for him. So, we wil have to wait and see how it all turns out.

[dmschnei]

I am sorry to hear of Your loss.. I know it will be almost a month (as of the 9th) of this month, that my hubby passed. I sit here and wonder why? It is not easy AT ALL! Dennis and I were together for about 3 years and married for less then 5 months. We both had marriages we came from where we were not happy. We were perfect together. We never had a chance to have children together and i now regret that. I sit here and ask (and i know, no one can answer) when we FINALLY find that perfect mate, does god seperated us? I have been sad, angry, hurt, and lost... His children from previous marriage, have accepted me from day one and i blessed for that, as they have been trying to keep me busy in almost every way... From carving pumpkins w/ the grandson, to taking me out.. I have only been home one day since he passed and i am hoping to make tomorrow two. I am glad to hear you have a friend in her husky. Animals do understand and sometimes, more then humans. I am happy that he is the reason for your getting up everyday. Before Hubby passed, i was not working, as that is what he wanted and i was fine w/ that cause he wanted me to further my education and i was going to school instead of work. So, i have been very lucky to get a little part time job. I need something more then that so i do not get evicted from my residence.. I always tell the grandkids, everything happens for a reason? Well, i know i am completely lost for this reason.. There was a song a friend told me about from a group called Diamond Rio and it is called one more day! I said, i would be happy w/ just one more moment.. I hope i didn't waste too much of your time.. I do believe the dog is here to keep you company! You can only take one day at a time and I hope you will..

Dawn