Just lost my mother

[Shornie314]

I lost my mother almost a month ago and I am having such a hard time with this. I am 41, divorced mother of 3. My mom was 79 and going to turn 80 on her next birthday next month. My oldest son (her first grandson) graduated with honors on June 13th. The entire family had a great time (we ate afterwards). Two days later my mom had a heart attach over night and passed away. She was alone. She had called me at 11:30 the night before, when she found out I was on my way to bed she said nevermind she would talk to me "tomorrow" the next call I received was my brother saying that she had passed away over night. I never thought that our time was so short. I keep having thoughts that maybe she was upset with me when she passed because she decided not to talk to me till the morning. Then I think about her being alone. I think about me not saying I love you one last time. Our relationship was strained at times but when she needed something if i couldnt do it right then I would tell her when I could do it and then I would do it. That night we talked she upset me because I told her to talk to me and she wouldnt she said she would talk to me the next day. This recent mothers day as I was on my way to church she called me to ask me to take her to the hospital....my brother lives five minutes away and my neice (30years old) spent the night with her... I live 13 miles away. I skipped going to church and I came to pick her up...I was a little angry when I found out my neice was there...why didnt she have her take her to the hospital...what if this was a true emergency. Turns out she wanted me so in hindsight I am glad that I took her. I hope that she knows that I loved her even thought I didnt say it enough. I am having a hard time just going on with my life and I dont know how I will make it through this.

[rengle10]

Hello my name is Robin i am 40 yrs old and a only child

I am sorry for your loss, I understand I lost my mom on June 2 2011, It feels like nothing will get better, you cant understand why this happen to you, it not fair that she is gone, how you are going to make it with out her and so many more things.

[carter19]

Shornie314, I offer my condolences on the loss of your mother, it hurts and it's hard to cope with. I lost my father 13 weeks ago and in my family we never say the "love" word, it just wasn't something that was said but I know that my father knew that he was loved, not only by myself but by the rest of the family by our actions and the knowledge that we were always there for each other when ever we were needed. Just remember all of the times you told your mother that you loved her, she wouldn't be upset at the time of her passing with someone that loved her so much and did so much for her.

Keep strong

Dmc44

[ModKonnie]

I lost my mother almost a month ago and I am having such a hard time with this. I am 41, divorced mother of 3. My mom was 79 and going to turn 80 on her next birthday next month. My oldest son (her first grandson) graduated with honors on June 13th. The entire family had a great time (we ate afterwards). Two days later my mom had a heart attach over night and passed away. She was alone. She had called me at 11:30 the night before, when she found out I was on my way to bed she said nevermind she would talk to me "tomorrow" the next call I received was my brother saying that she had passed away over night. I never thought that our time was so short. I keep having thoughts that maybe she was upset with me when she passed because she decided not to talk to me till the morning. Then I think about her being alone. I think about me not saying I love you one last time. Our relationship was strained at times but when she needed something if i couldnt do it right then I would tell her when I could do it and then I would do it. That night we talked she upset me because I told her to talk to me and she wouldnt she said she would talk to me the next day. This recent mothers day as I was on my way to church she called me to ask me to take her to the hospital....my brother lives five minutes away and my neice (30years old) spent the night with her... I live 13 miles away. I skipped going to church and I came to pick her up...I was a little angry when I found out my neice was there...why didnt she have her take her to the hospital...what if this was a true emergency. Turns out she wanted me so in hindsight I am glad that I took her. I hope that she knows that I loved her even thought I didnt say it enough. I am having a hard time just going on with my life and I dont know how I will make it through this.

Shornie314,

Your mother knows you love her, even if you didn't get to say it again or enough. Just as you knew she loved you, she knew you loved her. It will take some time, but things will get somewhat easier, and you will find a new "normal" to your life. For now, it's okay to cry and grieve as much as you want. Feel free to tell us all about your mother when you are up to it.

ModKonnie