Jump to content
Forum Conduct & Guidelines Document ×

Lost Dad Day after Christmas - Lung Transplant


brunzella92

Recommended Posts

  • Members

Hi all, i'm so glad i found this site, i've been searching for a while now.

My story goes back 7 years ago when my father was diagnosed with scarring of the base of both lungs. Long story short,

you only live 4-5 years after diagnosis so in 2008 he was put on an active lung transplant list. Mind you, no one i've ever

known has been listed or had any sort of transplant. We were on our own to find out any knowledge of transplants.

So on November 3rd of 2008 after being listed only 11 days my father got a call for a lung with another gentleman and they

both ended up having a transplant at the same time. We were so lucky to find a donor so quickly as my father was failing

BADLY. So there were ups and downs in the hospital the next month that he was admitted. Then we got a shock (again)

they had found cancer in the lung that they removed but were pretty sure they got it all after the fact. My father had a great

first year after the transplant but Christmas of 2009 the cancer was back in his old remaining lung and ultimately spread

to the new lung. We were all devastated as my father is on 64 at the time. he did some chemo that almost killed him as

chemo works against immunosuppressant drugs for the rejection of the new lung.

So in June this past year we had the "family" meeting where they said they couldn't do anything else for him. My world has

been shattered since the day i found out he was ill 7 years ago but the past 2 have been so sad. He was hospitalized 16

times but was a trooper every time. My father LOVED life, every minute of it, would never give up or talk about his cancer.

Did not complain one time in the past 7 years.

On December 26th, my dad passed away that morning. He willed himself through Christmas and told me "he didn't want

to pass on Christmas". Totally rallied Christmas Eve. We were so shocked. My mother, brother and I have been handling

it pretty well but as the days go on i'm literally getting worse by the day. I cry all the time now. I think it's the reality he's not

coming back.

What a tribute through, he was such a great person, there were 500 people at the wake and 200 at the funeral. How do you

all cope, i'm 36 btw and not married yet. That's what hurts sooo badly, he left me a letter about "someday wedding bells

may be heard".

I'm crushed :(

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Hi all, i'm so glad i found this site, i've been searching for a while now.

My story goes back 7 years ago when my father was diagnosed with scarring of the base of both lungs. Long story short,

you only live 4-5 years after diagnosis so in 2008 he was put on an active lung transplant list. Mind you, no one i've ever

known has been listed or had any sort of transplant. We were on our own to find out any knowledge of transplants.

So on November 3rd of 2008 after being listed only 11 days my father got a call for a lung with another gentleman and they

both ended up having a transplant at the same time. We were so lucky to find a donor so quickly as my father was failing

BADLY. So there were ups and downs in the hospital the next month that he was admitted. Then we got a shock (again)

they had found cancer in the lung that they removed but were pretty sure they got it all after the fact. My father had a great

first year after the transplant but Christmas of 2009 the cancer was back in his old remaining lung and ultimately spread

to the new lung. We were all devastated as my father is on 64 at the time. he did some chemo that almost killed him as

chemo works against immunosuppressant drugs for the rejection of the new lung.

So in June this past year we had the "family" meeting where they said they couldn't do anything else for him. My world has

been shattered since the day i found out he was ill 7 years ago but the past 2 have been so sad. He was hospitalized 16

times but was a trooper every time. My father LOVED life, every minute of it, would never give up or talk about his cancer.

Did not complain one time in the past 7 years.

On December 26th, my dad passed away that morning. He willed himself through Christmas and told me "he didn't want

to pass on Christmas". Totally rallied Christmas Eve. We were so shocked. My mother, brother and I have been handling

it pretty well but as the days go on i'm literally getting worse by the day. I cry all the time now. I think it's the reality he's not

coming back.

What a tribute through, he was such a great person, there were 500 people at the wake and 200 at the funeral. How do you

all cope, i'm 36 btw and not married yet. That's what hurts sooo badly, he left me a letter about "someday wedding bells

may be heard".

I'm crushed :(

Brunzella,

You get by a little at a time, hour by hour, day by day. I am so sorry about the loss of your Dad. My Dad died in August of 2009. At first, it was very difficult to get through the day. Then, I'd have a good few days, a bad few days. Things started feeling better, but then the anniversary came up, and that was difficult to get through. I relived every moment in my mind of his last few days.

My father suffered badly before he died. It was at the time, almost a relief to see him finally at peace and rest, but then I felt guilty over feeling that way.

While I still miss him, and I want to talk to him very badly, I know that one day, I will see him again.

I am sorry about the loss of your father, but I know there are people here who can offer support and encouragement. We will be here when you need us,

ModKonnie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Brunzella,

You get by a little at a time, hour by hour, day by day. I am so sorry about the loss of your Dad. My Dad died in August of 2009. At first, it was very difficult to get through the day. Then, I'd have a good few days, a bad few days. Things started feeling better, but then the anniversary came up, and that was difficult to get through. I relived every moment in my mind of his last few days.

My father suffered badly before he died. It was at the time, almost a relief to see him finally at peace and rest, but then I felt guilty over feeling that way.

While I still miss him, and I want to talk to him very badly, I know that one day, I will see him again.

I am sorry about the loss of your father, but I know there are people here who can offer support and encouragement. We will be here when you need us,

ModKonnie

Thank you so much for your kind response. I'm so sorry for your loss as well. That sentence about suffering and being a relief. We too experienced that. My dad was on very high oxygen

and couldn't breathe what so ever. He was also very confused 2 weeks prior to dying do to lack of oxygen. Life just doesn't seem fair i guess!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Thank you so much for your kind response. I'm so sorry for your loss as well. That sentence about suffering and being a relief. We too experienced that. My dad was on very high oxygen

and couldn't breathe what so ever. He was also very confused 2 weeks prior to dying do to lack of oxygen. Life just doesn't seem fair i guess!!

No, Life doesn't seem fair at all. My dad went through some sort of psychosis, where he completely lost his mind, was angry at all of us, accused us of things we didn't do, saw people and food floating and weird things. Then he returned to normal, then he'd flip out again. His last few days were nothing but trying to get him comfortable.

My mother-in-law died of cancer that had spread to her lungs. She was on high oxygen and also couldn't breathe, but then she would panic and that was very tough. We kept her at my home to die. Her last few days were rough, too, until she went into a coma, and then we were kind of relieved because she was so terrified and suffered so much.

Hang in there, though. Things will get better as you move forward.

ModKonnie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

This site uses cookies We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. and uses these terms of services Terms of Use.