Father Dating Again!

[IlanaEpsteinRabone]

I'm not sure how to handle this! My mother passed away in May from Ovarian Cancer. It was very sudden as she was fine up until December and in May she was gone. Now my father is telling me that he posted an online profile on a dating website and is starting to go on dates. I'm trying to be supportive, but its only been a short time since mom passed. I know that he's lonely and needs companionship, but I'm wondering whether its too soon. I don't want him to get hurt! I tried to tell him my feelings about his dating, but he told me he's not trying to replace my mother, just needs some companionship.

Is it normal to feel this way? I seem to be the only one in my family (brother and father) who is still grieving. They seem to be doing fine while I am in counseling and attending support groups.

Thanks!

[ModKonnie]

I'm not sure how to handle this! My mother passed away in May from Ovarian Cancer. It was very sudden as she was fine up until December and in May she was gone. Now my father is telling me that he posted an online profile on a dating website and is starting to go on dates. I'm trying to be supportive, but its only been a short time since mom passed. I know that he's lonely and needs companionship, but I'm wondering whether its too soon. I don't want him to get hurt! I tried to tell him my feelings about his dating, but he told me he's not trying to replace my mother, just needs some companionship.

Is it normal to feel this way? I seem to be the only one in my family (brother and father) who is still grieving. They seem to be doing fine while I am in counseling and attending support groups.

Thanks!

Hi and welcome to the forum. It is perfectly natural for your father to want companionship. While it is soon, it may seem like forever to him that she's been gone and he is alone. He may be looking around, go out, and realize he's not ready. Or, he may find someone that also desperately needs friendship. Either way, I know it makes you uncomfortable, but he is trying to go on with his life as best as he can. Please try to support him.

How long were your parents married? My parents were married 54 years when my father died last August. My mother is terribly lonely now, and is ready to find a companion, but we (my siblings and I) are in shock and a bit mad at her. It is something we are trying to all work through. She has a right to find someone else, but the thought of her with another man is freaking all of us out and we feel guilty and honestly betrayed on behalf of Dad. But, she is not doing anything wrong. She is used to having a partner, and she misses that. She can't bring Dad back, so she has to move on. It is difficult for her, too.

So, I understand in many ways what you are going through.

Konnie