Members Hananna Posted December 22, 2017 Members Report Share Posted December 22, 2017 I really need to rant about this and get all the frustration and anger off my chest. My 3 year old cat Sox went missing ~3 weeks ago. This was fairly typical of him as we had recently moved house and he never managed to settle, and would often return to our previous house. As time went on we became more and more concerned, and began to put missing posters up and spread alerts all over social media groups. On Monday this week, I received a message from a stranger who said that she had seen my cat dead in the garden of our previous address about 2 weeks prior. She told me that she had phoned the council to remove him, but by the time the council had arrived, his body had disappeared. We have contacted local vets (as he was microchipped) but they don't know anything. We phoned the council and they said that when they realised there was no body to collect, they knocked on the door of the house and the woman that lives there said he must have been dragged off by a wild animal. I find this hard to believe considering the type of area we live in, and I'm becoming more and more concerned that she disposed of his body herself. I can't get these images of him being dumped in a garbage bin out of my head. This whole situation has really triggered my pre existing depression and anxiety and I'm not coping with not having any closure. I just wish someone would own up and admit they made a mistake, I don't care, I just want to know where he is because I can't be at peace while I'm living with this uncertainty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted December 22, 2017 Moderators Report Share Posted December 22, 2017 I am so sorry for your loss. Sometimes we don't get closure and that does make it really hard on us, but we have no choice but to accept that they're gone and grieve for them even though we don't have a body to bury. June 3, 2016 I let my Miss Mocha outside, it was 6 am and broad daylight. I was outside all day working in the yard, I never heard or saw anything amiss. At the end of the day I came in and was surprised to not hear from Miss Mocha. She NEVER disappeared on me! I went outside and looked for her and called her. I put up flyers, called neighbors, posted on Facebook, nothing. No one saw anything. I asked people to check their garages, anything they might have had open during the day. Nothing. She always slept next to me, pushed up against me, so I had a really hard time in the nighttime, imagining the worst, no Missy Mocha to sleep with me. The only thing I can figure out is a wild animal got her, and I pray it was quick and she didn't suffer. When a cougar or bird swoops them up, they often go into shock, a way to protect them from what is happening, so I hope that is the case. I never let her outside at night and usually in the daytime nothing bothered, I'd had her 10 1/2 years and she was in great health and was very happy here, she would not have run away. I don't know how old she was because she showed up on my place one day as a full grown adult, she'd had kittens and been spayed before I got her. I figured her owner dumped her here (I live out in the country) because they got tired of her scratching furniture and peeing on the rug, things I came to deal with. They create such a spot in our hearts, they are our family, and we never stop missing them. I'm thinking of getting her a memorial stone and placing it in the yard where my other pets have been buried...I don't know her birth year, but I can put my best guess. The hard part is continuing without them. I STILL miss her and it's been 1 1/2 years. I'm thankful for each day I got to have her in my life, she was very special, so feminine with her blue eyes and dainty little meow. Your cat is sweet, reminds me of my King George, he passed 11 1/2 years ago, he was 19, had cancer. This never gets easier does it. (((hugs))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AJWCat Posted December 23, 2017 Members Report Share Posted December 23, 2017 Hi Hananna, I am SO sorry about your loss and especially not having closure. I wish I could give you some advice or suggestion of what to do. To echo what KayC said, you work to find peace in your heart and grieve to give yourself the closure you need without knowing exactly what happened. My cat died of something awful, maybe a poison or something we tracked from the outside, I will never know for sure and not knowing exactly what happened drives me a little crazy. All I can do is do try to accept it, deal with my anger over it, forgive myself and move through my tremendous grief one day at a time. Again, I am so sorry you are going through this and I wish you peace as you mourn your kitty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted December 23, 2017 Moderators Report Share Posted December 23, 2017 I hate to even think about something like that, it sounds horrific, AJW. I hope and pray Miss Mocha and Sox went quickly and did not suffer. How are you doing today Hananna? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Hananna Posted December 24, 2017 Author Members Report Share Posted December 24, 2017 Thank you for your kind words, it does bring some comfort. I'm sorry for both of your losses. Each day gets a little easier but it's still hard. My parents surprised us all with a new kitten yesterday. I'm having such mixed emotions, I adore our new cat, but it does make me miss Sox so much more. It's very bittersweet. I think we all knew that we needed to bring home another cat sooner rather than later as Sox's litter mate was grieving and it was hard to see her lonely. I think because we don't have a body to bury and there is such a lack of closure, I'm doing everything I can to remember him. I've made donations to some pet charities in his name and I've ordered a scrapbook so I can fill it with photos and memories of Sox. It pains me that he wasn't treated with any dignity or respect in death, so I'm trying my hardest to honour him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amarumane Posted December 24, 2017 Members Report Share Posted December 24, 2017 I’m so sorry for your loss your cat is so handsome I know how hard it is to lose a loved furry best friend but never experienced a feeling of not knowing what had happened. Try to remember the happy times it’s unfortunate that there is no feeling of closure I hope some day you will be feeling better at the thoughts of the good times you had with your lovely kitty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted December 24, 2017 Moderators Report Share Posted December 24, 2017 Having another kitten is probably a good idea for the sibling left, they grieve too and don't understand, it's really hard. I've ordered memorial stones from this place (you can google promo codes for Personal Creations and get something off)https://www.personalcreations.com/product/pawprints-in-heaven-memorial-marker-30192930?q=30192930&start=&spell=&srchSuggestion=y&trackingpgroup=pid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AJWCat Posted December 24, 2017 Members Report Share Posted December 24, 2017 I waited 4+ months to adopt a new cat and it has been very hard. I wanted a total replacement for our cat. Sadly, not possible. I also stopped being so selfish and tried to focus on saving one from a shelter. But shopping for her, feeding her, it all reminds me of our other cat. Anyway, I am glad you guys got a companion for your other kitty, and that you are memorializing Sox. He will never be truly replaced. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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