I Lost my mother

[mako7]

Hello everyone. I lost my mother yesterday. She had cancer and was going to undergo chemotherapy. But she decided that her life was not going to be worth fighting this terrible disease and she ended it. It was unfortunately a most horrific way to go(I won't go into any details now). She left her husband,daughter and her son(me). I am 23 years old and just getting around to starting my life and now I have to do it without her. I miss her so much. I can't put my pain into words.

[Ash]

mako7,

I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. That sounds very unfortunate and unfair to all you. I wish I had the right words to comfort you, but I don't know what to say. The only thing I can suggest is for you to please take care of yourself and don't be afraid to reach out for help, you are not alone. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[sadandlost]

Dear mako7,

I'm so sorry for your loss.  Its a terrible shock.  I look back almost a year ago since I lost my mom and that first month was pure shock.  Raw indescribable shock.  So I know what you're going through.  I too like Ash wish I could say something comforting but there isn't anything because what you have experienced is traumatic.  I can't say next month you'll feel better.  I'm certain you won't.  Please just recognise this period as shock because its impossible to process all that has happened at the moment.  Real grief starts when the shock wears off.  Trying to make sense of all the details and the story is impossible.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  We all know what that pain is like.  Please write more when you are able to.  This is a safe place to express how you feel as we are all in the same boat, struggling to find our way in this new existence.  

[mako7]

Hi and thanks for your messages. I feel a lot better than yesterday, though I do not know for how long. My mom was the strongest person I knew and was so lovable and kind. The pain exists and there are so many questions which will go unanswered. I cannot imagine how she felt in her last moments and I feel terrible that in spite of all the love she got, she still felt alone and helpless. 

[Tennisfan]

So sorry about your loss. While it doesn’t help make the loss any less painful, you must be grateful that she’s not suffering any more.

Your family is your biggest strength and you theirs.

[reader]

Dear mako7,

My deepest sympathies and condolences. I'm very sorry for your loss.

Thinking of your and your family during this difficult time. Sending all my thoughts and prayers.

[mako7]

Hi everyone! I can't believe a week has passed by. It's hard but I'm getting a little better. I get a better understanding of what my mom did. She was in pain and she realized she wasn't going to get better. Perhaps the long road would've been hard and torturous for all of us and in the end she would've still succumbed to cancer. My mother was never a depressed person but cancer ate through her peace of mind as well. I can't believe she's not here anymore. There was so much to look forward to. I keep wondering whether I will recover from this. My family and friends have been an unbelievable support to me and give me the strength to heal from this. I'm so sorry to everyone who has lost their loved ones in such a horrible manner