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Lost my BF in car accident


award16

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So I am 18 and my boyfriend was 19, about to turn 20 in December. I am away at college right now and am only 45 minutes away from home so when it came to seeing each other it would be about every other weekend. On September 22, 2017 I received a text message saying that my boyfriend, who was really big into motorcycles and everything, was hit by a car on his way home from just getting gas. He was only gone for 10 minutes and was only a couple of yards away from his street when he was hit. The car turned right into him, my boyfriend had the right of way, and my boyfriend didn't suffer after being hit. My world has bee turned upside down since the accident because he was my world, even though we were so young we knew we had something very special and so did everyone around us. He was my best friend and I miss him terribly everyday. 

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My heart aches for your loss of your special young man, award16. I send you hugs.  I can’t imagine how terrible it must have been to learn of his death via a text !  I am so sorry you have to endure this pain at such a young age.  I hope you are well supported by friends, family and when you’re ready, a grief counsellor, preferably one with training in sudden, traumatic deaths.  

A careless driver killed my darling also.  Our world, our lives as we knew them, turned upside down, inside out. Our hearts, minds and souls ripped apart.  Fit, healthy men gone way too soon.  Our futures - stolen from us in an instant. 

Sadly, there are a few (too many) of us on the forum now that lost our beloved partners to careless drivers.  I hope you will find understanding, love and compassion here in our grief family.  It’s a tough road, this grief of a partner.  We need all the help we can get !!  Know that you’re in my thoughts, award16. 

Sending you strength, love and hugs. XX 

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award16,

I'm so sorry.  I'm glad he didn't have time to suffer, but I know your suffering is great.  My sister had a car accident 50 years ago that forever changed her life...it killed her three year old and rendered her a quadriplegic who can't communicate (they butchered her vocal chords in the emergency tracheotomy).  It's amazing that in the blink of an eye everything can change so drastically.  Her accident was also within a mile of her home, as they say most accidents are. 

I hope you will see a counselor, and if you have a hard time with school because of your inability to focus, please talk to your professors and let them know what is going on.  Some of them will give you some leeway.  I hope you have good support, it's hard for other young people to relate to loss/grief, not having been touched by it before.  It does help to express yourself and know your feelings are heard and understood, so it really does help to come here.

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20 hours ago, award16 said:

So I am 18 and my boyfriend was 19, about to turn 20 in December. I am away at college right now and am only 45 minutes away from home so when it came to seeing each other it would be about every other weekend. On September 22, 2017 I received a text message saying that my boyfriend, who was really big into motorcycles and everything, was hit by a car on his way home from just getting gas. He was only gone for 10 minutes and was only a couple of yards away from his street when he was hit. The car turned right into him, my boyfriend had the right of way, and my boyfriend didn't suffer after being hit. My world has bee turned upside down since the accident because he was my world, even though we were so young we knew we had something very special and so did everyone around us. He was my best friend and I miss him terribly everyday. 

I am so terribly sorry for your loss.  My Charles and I were about your age when we married and I know what you mean when you talked about having something special.   We had that *special* something; and the good part is that it never goes away.  Right now it hurts like hell and you don't know if you'll make it through this or if you really want to.  It's a type of sadness where you might find yourself crying all the time; but more than that, a sadness that overwhelms your entire body, leaving your heart aching and your stomach empty.  Making you feel weak and tired and yet you can't sleep because the sadness is in your dreams. It's almost like a sadness you can't escape. And it's OK to feel that way.  When I lost my  Charles, I felt as if life was caving in on me and I didn't want to exist without him. I wanted to curl up in a ball and for the time being and go to a place where I didn't have to feel. 

You loved him and you will miss him terribly; but remember that *special* love you shared not the loss. Not all persons know that *special* type of love and will never experience it in their lifetime.  You did; be grateful for that; be grateful for him not suffering; many others suffer a long agonizing life; be grateful the time you shared together will last a lifetime. 

I hope you continue to post here;  I've come to know that we are family here and I believe we're all put here by God to help uplift, encourage, motivate and strengthen one another along this awful journey we find ourselves on.  We don't know what the future will bring us, but I know who holds my future - God - and there's no one better.

Know that you are in my prayers!

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award16, Just needed to let you know my heart breaks for you and I am so so sorry.  I don't want to repeat anything that the others of our family here have already wrote to you.  You and your lovely young man were blessed to find that special love, that love does not come around for just anyone.  Keep that love and the beautiful memories in your heart and they will help carry you along your road of grieving. That bond of love will always be there, it can never be broken. You will see him again one day, when it is your turn to go home to Heaven.

Sending prayers to you for God's strength, comfort and eventual peace.  (HUGS)

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On 11/26/2017 at 8:01 PM, award16 said:

So I am 18 and my boyfriend was 19, about to turn 20 in December. I am away at college right now and am only 45 minutes away from home so when it came to seeing each other it would be about every other weekend. On September 22, 2017 I received a text message saying that my boyfriend, who was really big into motorcycles and everything, was hit by a car on his way home from just getting gas. He was only gone for 10 minutes and was only a couple of yards away from his street when he was hit. The car turned right into him, my boyfriend had the right of way, and my boyfriend didn't suffer after being hit. My world has bee turned upside down since the accident because he was my world, even though we were so young we knew we had something very special and so did everyone around us. He was my best friend and I miss him terribly everyday. 

Aware16 -- I am so sorry to hear about your boyfriend.   This is a terrifying experience and the grief process is a terribly journey to go through.  Losing someone at your age creates additional challenges.  Are you in school?  Are there counseling and therapy you can look into?

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