Im 30 and both my parents are dead

[Fergo]

I lost my mom when I was 7 years old to leukaemia, Im now 30 and my father died suddenly of a heart attack in Feb. Its been 8 months, first few months I was ok, had up and down days but now I am having anxiety and depression. 

I feel hope and acceptance deep down, I am ready to let go almost but there is something small hanging on?! I feel alone even though I have a great support network. Anyone shed a bit of light on this?? 

Stay strong

[sadandlost]

Dear Fergo,

I'm so sorry for both your losses.  Must have been terrible to lose your mom so young and now your father.  I am glad to hear you have a strong support network.  8 months is not very long at all.  I think loss is processed gradually over a long period of time because one can't possibly process all the layers at once.  It takes time.  I don't really understand the "let go" aspect?  Personally after the loss of my mother now 9 months, I find it harder than it was in the beginning.  The first 3 months were shock and disbelief and raw with emotion.  After 6 months it improved a little.  Then I hit 8 months and more anxiety and a deeper level of depression and aloneness hit.  I didn't understand what you need to let go of?  Loss is always there, I don't doubt in time it evolves but what are you hoping to let go of?  

[Fergo]

Hey sadandlost. 

Thanks for your reply. 

By letting go i mean, moving on some bit with my own life. I feel as though my father wouldn't want me dwelling as that's how he was but just I'm trying to remember the good and happy times as opposed to the traumatic event ya know. 

I'm feeling mentally stronger but sometimes it gets a bit overwhelming. 

[sadandlost]

I'm glad you're feeling stronger.  yes I know sometimes it can be be more overwhelming than others.