Members Mom2simba Posted September 21, 2017 Members Report Share Posted September 21, 2017 I need all the advice I can get please. On Monday myself, my husband and 2 kids held our cat Simba as his heart stopped beating. He was 17 and had kidney disease. He stopped eating and drinking. He gave me this look one night and it's like he was telling me to let go. I don't know how to explain it. I've never lost a pet of my own before this and the feeling of complete emptiness is horrible. I've had him my whole adult life - pretty much half my life actually. My kids seem fine now , they can talk about him and even getting another cat eventually. I can't even think of him without wanting to crumple to the ground. My chest is tight and hurts most of the day. I can't think straight at work and have to go to the bathroom and cry several times a day. I cry when I wake up, when I get home and when I go to bed. I feel like I'm trembling inside. I feel empty. I beg for him to come visit me I need to know he's okay. How long will this last? I hate this feeling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted September 22, 2017 Moderators Report Share Posted September 22, 2017 (Doulbe posted) Mom2simba, I lost my husband 12 years ago...we were more than just another married couple, we were soulmates, best friends, the love of each other's life, and I couldn't imagine living without him. Since then I've lost a dog and several cats. My animals have always been part of my family, they aren't "just a pet", they are everything to me. It's hard, but you will get through this, the intensity of the pain will eventually lessen and hopefully one day you can help your kids pick out another cat. Right now though it probably seems too hard for you, but I hope you'll leave your heart open for the future. Your cat lived a long time, you gave him a good life, and I'm sure he is grateful. I believe wholeheartedly that our pets go to heaven and we'll be together again. Heaven is a place where there is no more pain, no tears, the perfect utopia. No more bodies aging. We get a new body and time is no more...what could be more wonderful than that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Kathymingo Posted October 19, 2017 Members Report Share Posted October 19, 2017 Hi. I am having to say goodbye to my furbaby of 18 years. She has aggressive bladder cancer....euthanasia is not far off....i feel so desperately sad....not sure how I will get through without her....shes my world....i cannot stop sobbing...this pre grief until the real grief starts scares me.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AJWCat Posted October 19, 2017 Members Report Share Posted October 19, 2017 Hi @Kathymingo I am so so sorry. What a difficult time this is for you. I wish I could say something to make you feel better. She will be a massive loss. But, to put her down, and take away her pain and discomfort (which cats hide) and to have her in your arms to the very end is a kindness and gentle way for her to go. That does not make it easier. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 20, 2017 Moderators Report Share Posted October 20, 2017 Kathymingo, I am sorry you are facing the hardest decision any of us can be called upon to make. My son was struggling with the decision about his dog a few years ago...this dog was very special, my first granddoggy, he'd lived with me much of his life and it killed me to know we would be losing him. But the rule of thumb I've always used is how much pain are they in, has their quality of life been diminished. Considerations for them and what they are going through has always had to come before what I wanted, because of course none of us want to say goodbye to our family member. It just seems so final. But for each one, no matter how great the pain, I truly believe we'll be together again...it's just this wait is so hard. I know of no consolation or comfort equal to the task, it's just plain hard. It's been five years since Skye was put to sleep, and unfortunately, it was a couple weeks too long in coming. I'll spare you the details, but I wish he hadn't had to suffer so greatly. He was the sweetest dog in the world. I wish you strength and comfort as you go through this. It's very hard, we love them so much. Know as you come here, you are heard and we care and understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AJWCat Posted October 20, 2017 Members Report Share Posted October 20, 2017 Nice post @KayC It is ironic in that we always think we are taking them away from life too soon. We just can't bear to let them go. I feel like I waited the right time for my cats who each got lymphoma (a year apart) although by the very end both were so out of it, they didn't even fidget on the way to the vet. So I probably kept each one around longer than I should have... just for me just because I couldn't do it until I finally said, enough. It's easy to do because we love them but we have to sacrifice our needs for their ultimate comfort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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