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Eagle-96

Cemetery Marker

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On 8/18/2017 at 9:07 PM, KMB said:

Since I am right handed, I was thinking of having his sign off signature tattooed on my right hand. Always where I can see it. I've also thought of having a photo of him tattooed on one of my upper arms. 

If I could give a piece of advice, I would say the signature idea is great. My wife and I jokingly called ourselves Team Dayla. Since our names were Dan and Kayla, Dayla would be our "celebrity couple" name. I'm going to take a sample of her writing in and have Dayla tattooed on my wrist in her handwriting with some of her ashes mixed into the ink.

Photo tattoos so frequently end up looking strange that I would reeeeaaally think hard about that. The artist has to be incredible for it to look right and even then, often it just looks a bit off. I would keep it simple. Just my two cents.

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KayC   

I had my tattoo done on my butt so I have to look in the mirror to see it, but at the time people my age weren't getting tattoos unless they were bikers and my church frowns on it, so I decided to have it placed in a private place, it was kind of a statement, his mark on me, so to speak.  I had our symbol with his signature below it.  I used to have a picture of it but no longer have the supporting program for it.  I should have saved it as a jpg.

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KMB   

Djh, Thank you for the advice on a photo tat. I haven't made any decisions yet along the lines of getting inked. It is still just an idea floating around in the grief fog of my brain. Even though I have been progressing some in this unwanted process, I still feel I am stuck in a time warp most of the time. Every day is different with the emotions. Every day I wonder about my functioning level. My only seeming consolation is that every day I manage to get through, brings me closer to that reunion I long so much for.

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Francine   
On 8/17/2017 at 3:57 PM, Eagle-96 said:

It marks a spot on the ground that holds the shell she used for 46 years. It's not her there in the ground. So why does it hurt so much all over again? I

My feelings as well.  The ground only holds the shell our loved one occupied, not the essence of who they really were.  My own study of the Bible has convinced me that our souls/spirits go immediately into the presence of God when we die and if you believe in God's word, we all would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord” (2 Corinthians 5:8).

It hurts because we are still human with human minds and thoughts.  Our feeble minds can't begin to comprehend what's in stored for us.  Although the Bible doesn’t answer all our questions about life after death, it clearly tells us that we can look forward to heaven’s joys when we die, if we know Christ. Shortly before His death and resurrection, Jesus told His disciples, “I am going there to prepare a place for you … that you also may be where I am” (John 14:2-3).  And I believe God's word.  HE has prepared a place for your Lori and my Charles.

The most important truth I believe is that Lori and Charles spirits are with God, and nothing evil or harmful will ever touch them again. In heaven, God “will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Revelation 21:4). Why would anyone not want to go there? 

Stay Strong and know you are in my prayers, always!

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KayC   

Well put, Francine!  Sean, it hurts because of what it signifies.  We give significance to the burial plot, marker, or the urn and ashes.  Even though we know their spirit is not there, it still carries meaning to us for what it represents.  We honor them with what we do with their bodies, that's why some make so much money off selling us expensive caskets or fancy urns!

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Francine   
On 9/16/2017 at 4:15 PM, KayC said:

We honor them with what we do with their bodies, that's why some make so much money off selling us expensive caskets or fancy urns!

Ditto that!  As long as greed is stronger than compassion, there will always be suffering.

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