Mum passed away when i was only young

[gracey25091]

My mum passed away when I was 6, 13 years on I miss her more than ever. Since my mum passed away I have grown up with only my many brothers and dad. Being surrounded by boys I felt that I couldn't show much of my emotion, but now as I have gotten older I crave the unconditional love and support my mum would have given me. I feel like I'm missing out on one of the most important bonds a girl could have to help her through life. All I want is to be loved and cared from the way my mother would have. I hope someone can help this feeling of so much sadness stop

[reader]

Dear Gracey,

I'm sorry for your loss. I know its hard. Do you have any aunts that would be willing to listen and support you? Have you considered talking to a counselor or joining a support group?

Its natural to want that connection. We all want to be loved and cared for and I'm sorry its been so hard. Let your dad know, I'm sure he would try harder if he only knew.

Thinking of you.

[gracey25091]

Thanks so much for replying.

Yeah I do but we don't speak about her much and they also have their own children and families that they focus their time too. I have never considered a group, I guess the first step was speaking on here.

Its just ashame, I feel like everything would be okay only if I got her back I know I cant get her back but I just have so many things I would've liked to have found out from her. I find myself watching others with their daughter and just want someone to love me as much as they mums love their children

My dad is a proper mans man and doesn't show much emotion, so I wouldn't want to bring back all these memories years on, and its always harder for guys to give the same love that a mother would. 

Thanks again for responding I appreciate it so much. 

 

 

 

[reader]

You're more than welcome. Please know you are not alone in your feelings. My situation is different but I still have the same thoughts and feelings. I too wish my dad could still be alive. I hear other people talk about their dads and I want to do the same.

If you want to talk more, please know we are all here to listen.

Take care of yourself. I hope you can find some more supports through the community or through church.

 

[sadandlost]

Dear Gracey,

I am so sorry for your loss at such a young age.  I can't imagine what that feels like.  I can understand your feelings though because loosing a mother at any age the emptiness you feel inside is universal it seems.  When you are older and you loose your mom, you cling to all the memories, even the bad ones, you wish it were all back to how it was.  Even when my mother was harsh with me, she was always hard on me and expected a lot but she was also such a good person.  Honest and good.  Now she is gone I feel like all the goodness has gone with her.  I am not close to my family so I am alone pretty much all the time.  I wish she was still here so I could talk to her and tell her things like it used to be but she is not.  Like you I want that mothers love that is irreplaceable.  In comparison to you I had my mother for a lot of years, decades in fact.  Is it more of a loss to have someone there your whole life and then loose them?  or more of a loss to loose them so young when you are not yet properly formed?  I don't know.  I am very sorry for you that you have missed out on so much.  No one will ever replace your mother.  I do think that sometimes you can meet someone who you can develop a bond with in life, another woman that can be nurturing, that you can trust and you can benefit from.  That can happen Gracey.  I met a couple of older women many years ago and when my mother was still alive that have become very significant to me.  They don't replace her but I trust them and I love them and I know they love me and that can be a comfort sometimes.  I wish for you in time you will meet someone like that.  It can't be forced but just keep your eyes open and your heart when you think you may have met that person.  It takes a long time to know though.  It takes a long time to trust.  Wishing you love and comfort.