Questions About Eternity

[Sheree72]

These questions are basically about your opinions.  If anyone has any true testimonials I welcome those.  I was not married to my Jeff and I sometimes wonder how will I be re-united with him for all eternity.  In actually, since we were living together for years, we were basically living in sin.  I worry that our sin may keep us from being re-united in eternal life.  He is the man I would always want to spend my eternal life with.  My other question is "If" I ever happen to meet someone else (which is not anywhere on my agenda) and get married (a long shot because no one else could ever have my heart but Jeff), whom shall I be re-united with for eternity?  Will God only recognize my partner in marriage?  Will I be able to choose?  Will it be the one whom my total heart was given to first?  Again, I'm sure none of you know the answer.  I just wanted your take on it.  I know in my heart that NO man could ever be as amazing as my Sweetheart and I don't plan on ever giving my heart to any other man on this earth.  I was just curious.

[KMB]

Sheree--- Here is a link that really gave me comfort---https://leewoof.org/2017/01/29/will-happily-married-couples-be-together-in-heaven.  I do not feel that not being married is an issue. It is the relationship, the soul connection, that counts as far as Heaven goes. There are a few good articles on this site. At the end of this particular article, are references for further reading. Another on there is "If you've been married more than once, which one will you be with in the afterlife".

I hope the articles help with your questions. 

[Sheree72]

Thank you KMB.  I am now reading the information and as far as I can see, there is a lot of insightful information so I may be a while.  

[Ka9219]

HI Sheree, here is what I think: since we cant prove heaven is real, it is a possibility that the concept as we know it, it's just a production of our mind to hope we will be reunited with our love one. I don't judge any religion or any believe, what I think is that we have souls, an immortal part, "what we are", that travels to another dimension when we die, it could be heaven, paradise, or whatever you want to call it, but I also believe in reincarnation. Our souls have the ability and the possibility to come back to the world and live several lives in order to learn something. What happens with our love ones? I think that as a family (mother-father-son-daughter) and as a partners, our souls are "connected" and we will eventually meet in others lives.

What is important is not our "physical" lives, but the live of our soul, the dimension out there where we don't have human-bonds, where we are only happiness, light, peace and joy. In Buddhism it's said that as a humans we are here to suffer, to experiment sadness and suffering, and through love purify our souls.

If you ask me, the biggest blessing between a couple is love itself. Our souls "marry" in different ways, we are "marry" to someone that we truly love, a pure love.

I know it sounds crazy but that's what I believe 

[KayC]

I can tell you what the Bible says but on a public forum we always have those that don't believe in it and I don't want to upset anyone with my beliefs.  The scientists do say that we are energy and that energy doesn't die, so that leads one to conclude our lives continue beyond our bodies.  My personal belief and faith keeps me going with hope for the future.  if we believe we were fated to meet here, it's not a long stretch to believe we will reunite again.  I agree with KMB that it is not the piece of paper that matters so much as our uniting of souls on a deep level, that was the case for us and probably most that come here, we are the ones who deeply grieve the loss of our partner because we had something deep to grieve.

[Sheree72]

Thank you everyone.  I cannot tell you how comforting your replies have been.  KMB, I did finish the reading of the link you provided and for it, I found it to be very powerful and re-assuring for me.  It, along with everyone's replies, have given me strength to get through this.  Hugs and kisses to you all.  Thanks again.

[Francine]

 

Sherree 72 --  Living together before marriage is becoming increasingly common for a number of reasons. Before making a lifelong commitment, many couples want a “trial period” to feel out how they both live, and know if taking the relationship to the next level makes sense. I’m not against how anyone live their lives and if people choose to live together, that’s up to them. But I think we all have a point of reference and that, for me is what the Bible teaches and there are scripture that talks about that.    I know God is spirit, forgiving in nature and loves us unconditionally.  1 John: 1-9 states, "If we confess our sins HE is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness".  There is no *perfect* person on this earth and I think HE knows our faults and loves us in spite of them.

Like you, my Charles was the best thing that ever happened to me and there no others on this earth for me.  When my times comes to depart this earth, my faith tells me that I will be with him again and this time will be for eternity.  Another post indicated that we can't prove heaven to be real but my faith tells me otherwise. I have not been there personally, to know that it exist, but it does.  In John 20:29 it states, "Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believed."

I think we who know and love one another on earth will know and love one another in heaven but in a different way.  Scripture tell us that all this world - the desires of the flesh, the desires of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not from the Father, but from the world.   The world is passing away along with its desires, but all who have remained in God remains forever. When we leave this world and enter into the resurrection, HE gives us different minds, and bodies.  In this present age, we marry and are given in marriage, but those who are considered worthy of the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage, for we cannot die anymore, because I think we become equal to angels and are sons and daughters of God, being children of the resurrection.

Just my take on it; which might be totally wrong - but one thing that is totally right in my life is God Almighty.

[KMB]

4 hours ago, Sheree72 said:

along with everyone's replies, have given me strength to get through this.

 We need whatever prayers and help we can get. That is why we are a grief family here. By giving to others, we are also giving to ourselves. We are on this unwanted, difficult journey together, helping each other in healing.

[Andrew 521]

Sheree72.....Thank you for sharing the link in your post.  I got a lot out of the web site and book marked it for further reading.  Andrew

[KayC]

Francine, thank you for that. I share your beliefs, I know they aren't always well received, but I personally feel a hope that many who are lacking belief/faith don't experience, so I'm glad I do have my beliefs.  To me it's more than just a philosophy I ascribe to, it's knowing a real and living being, God, and taking his promises at His word.

[Francine]

On 8/3/2017 at 8:12 AM, KayC said:

Francine, thank you for that. I share your beliefs, I know they aren't always well received, but I personally feel a hope that many who are lacking belief/faith don't experience, so I'm glad I do have my beliefs.  To me it's more than just a philosophy I ascribe to, it's knowing a real and living being, God, and taking his promises at His word.

Ditto that KayC.  I hope I've not insulted anyone because it was never my intent to do so; however my beliefs are personal to me and I'd never coerce anyone into agreeing with me; I  just try to be the best person I can be and live by God's commandment.  I don't think God commanded us to trust people, HE commanded us to love people and trust HIM. Scripture states in John 13:34-35, "A new command I give you: Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this, all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love another". 

You never know GOD is all you need until GOD is all you have.  With God is on my side, I don't need anything; when I get up in the morning, I pray to God, not the president, the governor, the mayor, some black caucus, no this or that, I pray to God and that's the end of it.

Sorry for being so long-winded, but you touch on a subject I just Iove talking about. 

[Andy]

On 8/4/2017 at 10:34 AM, Francine said:

Ditto that KayC.  I hope I've not insulted anyone because it was never my intent to do so; however my beliefs are personal to me and I'd never coerce anyone into agreeing with me; I  just try to be the best person I can be and live by God's commandment.  I don't think God commanded us to trust people, HE commanded us to love people and trust HIM. Scripture states in John 13:34-35, "A new command I give you: Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this, all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love another". 

You never know GOD is all you need until GOD is all you have.  With God is on my side, I don't need anything; when I get up in the morning, I pray to God, not the president, the governor, the mayor, some black caucus, no this or that, I pray to God and that's the end of it.

Sorry for being so long-winded, but you touch on a subject I just Iove talking about. 

Well said Francine, well said. Your devotion is an inspiration, along with KayC and KMB, you give strength to those of us who have had our faith shaken. My belief and faith is firm, but my confidence is sometimes lacking. Thank you.

Andy

[KMB]

2 hours ago, Andy said:

My belief and faith is firm, but my confidence is sometimes lacking. Thank you.

I'll admit my beliefs, faith, has been shaken many times these past months. I have always gone back to it though. That is what is important, not to forsake it altogether. This grieving has me questioning and second guessing myself frequently. I guess that is because my other half is in Heaven and I feel unsafe, unsure. I am certainly learning the hard way on the differences of being one with my husband and surviving being half a person.

[Andy]

I think my greatest "test", if you will, is my having been forced to consider that things aren't as I once imagined. Not "bad", not cruel or unjust, but rather that reality, all reality, is far, far more complex than I ever dreamed. I've had to let go of some of my childhood notions of a simple working order of things. It's literally not that simple. I've come to believe nothing is quite that simple. My anger was more a product of my inability to fully understand, to truly "see". Before my wife passed I had long divorced myself from any ideas of fairness or justice on a "cosmic" scale. That's never been a question for me, rather my frustration came from not understanding the timing of her passing, why and for what purpose did I struggle with. Accepting that I will never know the exact reasons has been a challenge, but I think I'm finally content in my knowledge of ignorance. It's actually brought me a new level of comfort. If things were simple, if the reasons were all so plain to see, then I'd have to wonder how magnificent this "plan" really is. Certainly if I can sort it out then it mustn't be too wonderous. It is on a magnitude of such complexity and wrought with endless possibilities, it's impossible for someone as simple as I to ever perceive the ultimate endgame. I don't like all the events within this pattern, though I do like some. My daughter was born, my wife passed away, I've made a few incredible friends, I've had heartache and sadness, I've been blessed with saintly parents, I've met some despicable people, so it's neither all good or all bad, it just is. The one constant is how I react and how I choose to deal with my experiences. It's obviously FAR easier to ponder philosophically than it is to actually carry out, but it's still a choice. As long as I'm able, I will continue to choose life. To live. I'm not done yet, I still have one or two horizons to chase, and my wife will be with me the entirety of my adventures. If I happen upon a companion or I'm destined to go it alone, it's okay. I have a greater destiny than this world anyway. 

Andy

[Eagle-96]

I have not been shaken in my faith yet. I say yet because I don't know what the future holds. I don't know what heartache and strife I have in store. I sure didn't see this one coming so who am I to say that it won't be shaken. All that I can do is place my trust in God. I trust that he has given me what I need as opposed to what I want. That is a hard thing to reconcile knowing that, for whatever the reason, THIS is part of His plan. That THIS is what I need. I know that my feeble mind cannot begin to comprehend the workings of the universe and all of His plans. If I did, I'm not sure my Earthly mind could handle it. It's still a hard prayer for me to thank Him for where I'm at. For what I am going through. I mean, who thanks someone for taking their soulmate. But then I come back to the clay pot not questioning the artist. One day I'll know. One day I'll get it. I'm sure it will all make sense to me. But, then again, I'll be in Lori's arms for an eternity so I'm not sure I'll care too much about the reasons. 

[KayC]

My faith was sorely tested that first year, yet I remember choosing "It is Well (with my soul)" as one of the songs for his funeral, it is my statement of faith, that we should be able to say that in the worst of times, and this was definitely that.

Sean, I feel like you do, once we're reunited, none of this will matter, all that will matter is that we're together once more, never to be parted again!

[Francine]

On 8/6/2017 at 2:36 PM, Andy said:

I think I'm finally content in my knowledge of ignorance. It's actually brought me a new level of comfort. If things were simple, if the reasons were all so plain to see, then I'd have to wonder how magnificent this "plan" really is. Certainly if I can sort it out then it mustn't be too wonderous. It is on a magnitude of such complexity and wrought with endless possibilities, it's impossible for someone as simple as I to ever perceive the ultimate endgame. I don't like all the events within this pattern, though I do like some. My daughter was born, my wife passed away, I've made a few incredible friends, I've had heartache and sadness, I've been blessed with saintly parents, I've met some despicable people, so it's neither all good or all bad, it just is. The one constant is how I react and how I choose to deal with my experiences. It's obviously FAR easier to ponder philosophically than it is to actually carry out, but it's still a choice. As long as I'm able, I will continue to choose life. To live. I'm not done yet, I still have one or two horizons to chase, and my wife will be with me the entirety of my adventures. If I happen upon a companion or I'm destined to go it alone, it's okay. I have a greater destiny than this world anyway. 

Wow! You said it - you are so spot on in your post. I don't think things are suppose to be simple; life isn't simple; it's hard and sometimes the most important life lessons are the ones we end up learning the hard way.  I gotta believe that HIS plan is beyond our imaginations with wonders our little minds cannot even fathom.  I know, for me, God has gotten me through every hard moment in my life; I don't know what HIS plan for me is and not knowing can be scary  at times,  but I know HE has a purpose for me and everything we are going through is for good reason. Of course we don't understand it, but I've come to the conclusion, that all things are not meant for us to understand.

Sometimes when we are suffering so, we can only see what hurts us and that's natural; but when we stop and give it some thought, there's so much we were blessed with without our asking; like your daughter; your incredible friends; your saintly parents.  Unfortunately in life, sometimes getting hurt is a necessary path we must take.  I think the key is not to deny ourselves the experience, because it will make us stronger; but never dwell in it.  We must  go through it and not around it for us to get over it. (if that makes any sense)

You are such a wonderful spirit and I'm glad you are choosing life; I think your Tracie would would have wanted you to do as well; and yes, your destiny is too great, your assignment to important, your time too valuable to let fear intimidate you and you won't.  Thank you Andy for being you and for having such an impact on all of here on this site.  Take care and know you are always in my prayers.

[Andy]

Thank you Francine, you're very kind and sweet to say those things. 

It isn't always easy, sometimes I want to just run away. I'd never do that, but fading away has a certain attraction. Stress and anxiety are two demons I can't seem to shake, very clingy those two. I tend to my daughters wellbeing the best I can, I go to work like I'm supposed to, I take care of my animals, clean my home, the yard work, the cars, pay the bills, all the things that need to be done. Yet, at the end of the day, I'm alone. My obligations are met, I'll never turn my back on those I love, but when it's the evening, darkness is coming, I'm by myself and especially when I get up in the morning and I'm alone, it takes a lot out of me. I accidentally turned my alarm clock off this morning causing me to go into work an hour late. My wife would always wake me in time so I wouldn't be late. It's strange, it's going on 8 months and will still, on occasion, wake up not completely positive Tracie passed away, a semi dream state I guess. It's being alone all the time that makes me doubt my ultimate goal of being truly happy again, but it's fleeting. I'm okay, it's just that Grief still has a strong hold on me, and it pushes me down, but I get up. 

Thank you Francine, your posts are always so positive and thoughtful. Truly it's a blessing to know you. 

Andy

[KayC]

11 hours ago, Andy said:

It isn't always easy, sometimes I want to just run away.

I still feel that way sometimes, I want to get on a bus and go to the middle of nowhere, where no one knows me and start a new life.  Why?  I don't know.  I'd never do that, I am the type of person that carries out her responsibilities and would never leave the people that love me.  I never had this thought before George died and have no claim to understanding it or what it means.  Maybe I just get tired of everything always being on ME.

11 hours ago, Andy said:

Thank you Francine, your posts are always so positive and thoughtful. Truly it's a blessing to know you.

I feel the same way, about BOTH of you!
 

[KMB]

6 hours ago, KayC said:

I feel the same way, about BOTH of you!
 

Ditto that. I've been on here just reading posts, trying to keep myself uplifted. I had a bad night last night. Crying, getting up and wandering the living room, going back to bed, back and forth like that a couple of times. Finally dozed off after 3AM.  Like has been mentioned, the running away. But where to and what would be the point? This grieving is inside of me.

[Andy]

8 hours ago, KayC said:

I still feel that way sometimes, I want to get on a bus and go to the middle of nowhere, where no one knows me and start a new life.  Why?  I don't know.  I'd never do that, I am the type of person that carries out her responsibilities and would never leave the people that love me.  I never had this thought before George died and have no claim to understanding it or what it means.  Maybe I just get tired of everything always being on ME.

I feel the same way, about BOTH of you!
 

Thank you KayC! You're much too kind, but I appreciate it. I appreciate YOU more than you'll know. 

 

[Andy]

1 hour ago, KMB said:

Ditto that. I've been on here just reading posts, trying to keep myself uplifted. I had a bad night last night. Crying, getting up and wandering the living room, going back to bed, back and forth like that a couple of times. Finally dozed off after 3AM.  Like has been mentioned, the running away. But where to and what would be the point? This grieving is inside of me.

I know the feeling. Lately, just the last couple of evenings really, I've been having a couple of "moments". Nothing that breaks me into a million pieces, more of some late night melancholia, sad memories more or less.

In my case anyway, I think the running away is more an escape fantasy more than anything based in reality. The idea of shedding responsibility and obligation to focus on nothing but my grief, to eliminate stress, to find a new life, it's all just a game I play. Close my eyes and drift away, to better days and better possibilities. Of course running is impossible, for no matter how far I go, I'm still there. My grief is internal, but it's an interesting exercise to consider the "what ifs?" I don't do that in regards to my wife, that's far too sanctified a memory and too painful to entertain. KMB, I'm thinking about you, hoping you have better days and nights ahead. 

Love and hugs,

Andy

[Djh0901kc]

I'm so jealous of everyone that has some sort of faith. It seems like such a comfort. I try to believe in something, anything, and just cannot. 

[KMB]

51 minutes ago, Djh0901kc said:

I'm so jealous of everyone that has some sort of faith. It seems like such a comfort. I try to believe in something, anything, and just cannot. 

Please, do not be so hard on yourself! I feel that those of us who have any kind of a belief system, hang onto those elements even more tightly, in fear of falling off the edge into nothingness. 

I hope that in time, you get to a point where you find something, anything, even just a quote or a poem, to hang onto for yourself. Your loss is fresh, raw, with your whole being focused on the pain, Even in faith of what we believe in, we stumble and falter and question it. Some lose their way entirely, and hope they come back to it.

We are here for you and sending prayers of support, comfort and love!  (HUGS)

 

[Andrew 521]

3 hours ago, Djh0901kc said:

I'm so jealous of everyone that has some sort of faith. It seems like such a comfort. I try to believe in something, anything, and just cannot. 

I think at some point we find out that we have more faith than we ever realized we had.   It may have been buried for many years.  I have discovered a spiritual side of me that I never knew existed.  That part of me is awakening and is bringing me comfort and I want to explore it more.

[Eagle-96]

To me, the concept of running away to a place that nobody knows me seems to be foreign. I couldn't fathom being in a place where nobody knows about Lori. Where nobody loved her or misses her. I just want to be surrounded by people that saw what I saw. Felt what I felt. Yearn what I yearn for. It saddens me that the further I move from her death, the more people I will meet that didn't know Lori. That my stories might ring hollow of a person they have no concept of other than a picture or an anecdote. I fear living in that world.

[KayC]

13 hours ago, KMB said:

Please, do not be so hard on yourself! I feel that those of us who have any kind of a belief system, hang onto those elements even more tightly, in fear of falling off the edge into nothingness. 

I hope that in time, you get to a point where you find something, anything, even just a quote or a poem, to hang onto for yourself. Your loss is fresh, raw, with your whole being focused on the pain, Even in faith of what we believe in, we stumble and falter and question it. Some lose their way entirely, and hope they come back to it.

We are here for you and sending prayers of support, comfort and love!  (HUGS)

 

I agreeL!  Djh0901kc, maybe someday you will have something to hold onto.  I think the beginning of that is just being open to possibilities...

KMB,

I'm sorry you had such a bad night.   Like Andy said, our escape fantasy is probably just wanting to run away from what we can't because it's inside ourselves.  But I am also sick of being totally on my own, responsible for everything around here with no one to talk things over with.  12 years without George is getting to me.  It's getting harder to be brave at times.  I don't know how my mom did 33 years.

[KMB]

55 minutes ago, Eagle-96 said:

 It saddens me that the further I move from her death, the more people I will meet that didn't know Lori. That my stories might ring hollow of a person they have no concept of other than a picture or an anecdote. I fear living in that world.

I fear that world also. It is slowly going to creep in though. Except for family, close friends, anyone new we meet, is eventually, possibly, going to ask questions. Where is your husband, and that answer is going to bring more questions, why do you still wear your wedding ring, why are his belongings still everywhere? There will be more questions that I won't be able to answer. I don't want that world.

[KayC]

People shouldn't ask such questions.  I'd TELL them it's inappropriate!  I guess I've gotten a lot of moxie after he died.

[KMB]

I agree, Kay. When you are meeting people, trying to make new friends, build a little on a different life, they are naturally going to want to hear your back story. I'm a little on the shy side, so, nothing has been easy with this different life. It is my responsibility in setting boundaries, if I need to, with new people. It hasn't gotten to that point yet with me, but there are many scary aspects to this unwanted life.

[WaHaaf99]

Sorry to sound dumb, but living together before marriage is a sin? I never knew that?

My personal belief, based on my religious is that nobody is going to be married or anything like that. However, because we were together... We are going to have that special bond. 

[Djh0901kc]

I grew up in a very religious household. As I got older I just kind of lost my faith. Since my wife died I've tried going to church and even just going to talk to a few random priests/pastors. Like I said, I want to believe because my wife did. I need God to be real so I can have some chance to see her again. I just can't. I try to pray. I try to talk to my wife wherever she is. I just don't feel what you guys with faith feel. And it breaks my heart. What if it is all real and because I just can't believe I never see her again? And if there is nothing else I'll never see her again anyway. I feel so lost.

[Francine]

 

On 8/8/2017 at 10:32 PM, Andrew 521 said:

I think at some point we find out that we have more faith than we ever realized we had.   It may have been buried for many years.  I have discovered a spiritual side of me that I never knew existed.  That part of me is awakening and is bringing me comfort and I want to explore it more.

Ditto your entire post; - it is spot on and  so true in my opinion. 

On 8/8/2017 at 6:53 PM, Djh0901kc said:

I'm so jealous of everyone that has some sort of faith. It seems like such a comfort. I try to believe in something, anything, and just cannot. 

For me, having my faith sometimes brings me peace that is undescribable that  I wish everyone could experience.  I believe in God not because my parents raised me up to believe; not because the church said in order to have eternal life, you had to believe; but because I've experienced HS goodness and mercy for myself in my life.  I believe in the sun even when it's not shining; in love, even when I'm alone and can't feel it; and in God, even when I can't see him, but my faith tells me HE's there..  I don't think one can believe in God, until they first believe in themselves (if that makes sense)   So I would tell you to believe in yourself and all that you are; know that there is something inside you greater than any obstacle. Take on your challenges, dig deep within yourself to conquer fears, never let anyone bring you down. You got to keep going. Don't let fear or insecurity stop you from trying new things.  If you don't first believe in yourself, no one will.  Stay strong and God bless.

[KMB]

11 hours ago, KayC said:

 But I am also sick of being totally on my own, responsible for everything around here with no one to talk things over with.  12 years without George is getting to me.  It's getting harder to be brave at times.  I don't know how my mom did 33 years.

You are always in my prayers, Kay .I cannot see myself in your shoes 12 years from now. I avoid thinking that far ahead. This past year has been enough for me. If I am to learn suffering the loss of my soulmate, adjusting to being alone, I would think the term to be here should be a short one. You have certainly put time in and then some. Wish I knew God's reason for this.

[Francine]

On 8/9/2017 at 9:20 AM, KayC said:

 But I am also sick of being totally on my own, responsible for everything around here with no one to talk things over with.  12 years without George is getting to me.  It's getting harder to be brave at times.  I

I can only imagine. I hope you know you are not only capable, but you're brave, strong and my sister in Christ even when some days you may feel differently.  This may sound strange but I'm learning to accept sadness when it comes to visit me - I see it, spend time with it and say goodbye to it.  I'm learning not to push it away (like in the past), but owning it; because if I own it, I feel I can let it go until the next time it comes - a slow process but dealing with it.

We might disagree on some things but we share the same beliefs.  Nothing can stand against our God; whatever we face in life God will fight our battles and will make a way even when we don't see one.  We've all got a purpose and I truly think God has put you here at this time, in the place to be bold enough to use your voice, brave enough to listen with your heart and strong enough to live your nightmare while helping others.  

You are a diamond dear, nothing can break you.  I've said it before and I'll say it again; angels comes in many different forms; if you are waiting for the the white, winged, fluffy ones, you just might miss out; instead angels are often disguised as ordinary people who show up in your life when you need them the most - KayC that's you!

You know you are constantly in my prayers -  Stay strong, we all need you!

 

[KayC]

Thanks...we all have ups and downs in this journey.  I find sometimes when everything goes wrong around the house and George isn't here to help and it's always just me figuring out how to pay for it or hiring contractors that don't show up or do the job right...it is then that I get frustrated.  This is one of those times.  None of us feel strong all of the time.

[Francine]

2 hours ago, KayC said:

This is one of those times.  None of us feel strong all of the time.

So true and that is why we have this forum and all the wonderful people who are there for us when we are not.  Stay strong and feel better.

[KayC]

Thanks!

[TooDevastated]

I hope my boyfriend is still my boyfriend (isnt a bird or a plant etc) and is waiting to be united with me. That he remembers all that we had and is grateful for it as much as I am. 

I hope he isnt just gone. I remember many instances where I saw a sparkling light in his eyes looking so happy and had found myself thinking "he has the most beautiful soul on earth". 

After his death, I starting questioning these things more, naturally. And I chose to believe we all have souls. When I saw his body, I thought it was just vacant, what made him him was gone. 

He is there and he is waiting for me. And we will be together again. I cannot handle thinking otherwise. 

[M88]

Hiya TooDevasted - I don't doubt that your much loved partner remembers and treasures all that you shared and still feels your love.  Our beloveds would relieve us of our pain and suffering if it was within their power to do so.  But, don't be surprised if his spirit does visit you in the form of a bird until you are reunited   A bird not common to your own environment.  

Neither my late hubby or I were/are religious, but there is life after death - again I have no doubts about that. 

Sending strength and love X 

[Stonesie]

On 8/8/2017 at 7:53 PM, Djh0901kc said:

I'm so jealous of everyone that has some sort of faith. It seems like such a comfort. I try to believe in something, anything, and just cannot. 

I fall somewhere in the middle.  I hope desperately that I will be with Kevin after I die in some form or another.  I believe in God, but I am a skeptical person by nature.  I want it to all to be true...but I just don't know.  I have some comfort, but probably not as much as some others have because I cannot help but wonder.  I guess someday we will find out.

[KayC]

8 hours ago, TooDevastated said:

That he remembers all that we had

I have no doubt of that!  I do believe they retain everything that is them, their memories, personality, etc.  All they've lost is a body that no longer met their needs, and I'm told we'll get a new one of those so we should be good to go!

[KMB]

12 hours ago, TooDevastated said:

He is there and he is waiting for me. And we will be together again. I cannot handle thinking otherwise. 

None of us could handle not thinking otherwise. We just HAVE to have something to hang onto! It is the long wait that is going to be so hard to do.

[Eagle-96]

On 8/12/2017 at 1:20 PM, KMB said:

None of us could handle not thinking otherwise. We just HAVE to have something to hang onto! It is the long wait that is going to be so hard to do.

It's the cruelest paradox in the universe. The time we spent with our soulmates, no matter how long, seems like the blink of an eye now. But the wait we have in front of us until we meet them again in eternity seems like a million lifetimes. 

[hisha]

I had doubts about GOD and religions

now I kinda believe in reincarnation ..  maybe 

[KMB]

1 hour ago, hisha said:

I had doubts about GOD and religions

now I kinda believe in reincarnation ..  maybe 

No matter our belief system or even in not having one, we are going to falter, question and self doubt. We are enduring a traumatic loss and it is a natural part of grieving to question everything about ourselves. Besides grieving, we are also learning. Finding our way through the pain is teaching us lessons that can only help us grow into the person we were meant to become.The lessons are hard, painful, while we are missing our loved one and our life we had with them. But, I have read that it is all for our higher good for our eternal life when it is our turn to leave this earth.