livia214

loss of mother

6 posts in this topic

I lost my mother over a year ago fighting cancer. Im young and I was so attached to her. Im only 14 and its so hard for me. Im still coping with losing her. Thats my mom you know. I still cry when someone talks about her or when we go visit her. I feel like its never gonna change and im going to always feel sad. I get mad because why would god take her from me when he knew that she was my all. Everybody always tells me its going to be okay but they don’t understand the pain im going through. I just need advice or someone to talk to who has lost a parent also. 

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Dear Livia,

People tend to say stupid things like that.  It's going to be ok.... How do they know?  They don't know.  I hate when people say "you will be happy again"  how do they know?  They don't.  People just say things to say things because they don't know what to say.  Nobody knows what you are going through because they are not you.  No one knows what I am going through because they're not me.  No one understands someone else's pain.  I've learnt that.  I don't have any advice because there is no advice to give.  All we can do is try to communicate our pain.  I do believe eventually we will get used to loosing our mothers.  I don't think its something we can get over but eventually we adjust.  I am so deeply sorry you lost your mom at such a young age.  Its terrible.  I am much older than you and had my mom around 3 times longer than you and I can tell you, even when you loose your mom when you are older, its not easier.  Its not better.  You feel like a lost child again even when you are a grown up.  For you though you will miss out on a lot of big moments in your life that you can't share with your mom and for that I feel truly sorry for you.  Its devastating.  Please keep talking and don't suppress your pain.  Its important.  

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Hi,

i lost my mom a month ago and @sadandlost is right, people don't understand. It is a very individual thing, grief, and no one can tell anyone how they will and should feel. All I can tell you is for me, at 38, I feel like a little girl completely lost in this world. The pain is hell. All I can try to remember is what she would want for me. No mother wants their child to feel pain especially due to losing them. Losing your mom is the first pain they can't help you get through. And for you, at such a young age, I can only imagine the sadness and anger that her loss is putting you through. Please try to remember what she would want for you. And keep talking in this forum, it's helped me tremendously to talk to others that are going through what I am.

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On 7/15/2017 at 5:31 PM, livia214 said:

I lost my mother over a year ago fighting cancer. Im young and I was so attached to her. Im only 14 and its so hard for me. Im still coping with losing her. Thats my mom you know. I still cry when someone talks about her or when we go visit her. I feel like its never gonna change and im going to always feel sad. I get mad because why would god take her from me when he knew that she was my all. Everybody always tells me its going to be okay but they don’t understand the pain im going through. I just need advice or someone to talk to who has lost a parent also. 

I sent you a picture of a poem please read it

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I lost my mum last week, she was only 44 and I'm only 18. It was so sudden and unexpected that it still hasn't really sunk in yet, although when it does it's unbearable pain, and you're right, people don't know how you're feeling because they haven't been unfortunate enough to experience it. The way me and my sister are coping at the moment is looking at pictures and remembering funny memories, we saw her laid at rest and I think it helped us both as we got to say goodbye personally, I'm not sure if you got to do that with your mum, but it doesn't help everyone anyway, some people find it harder. My mum was my rock, she was my best friend and I'm not really sure how I'm going to get on with life without her. 

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Dear @Akc123,

My deepest sympathies and condolences on the passing of your cherished mum. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thank you for sharing your mum with us.

I know this is an extremely difficult time for you and your family.

Thinking of you. Sending all my thoughts and prayers.

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