Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
darkshadowgirl

Lost my Husband to Suicide. Need hope, help.

45 posts in this topic

I'm 36 years old and I was with my husband for 14 years or so, since we meet at 23. It was instant. He moved in 3 weeks after we met. We've been together for the most part since. We did have some REALLY rough times in our relationship, but we always came back together. He was my everything, my life, I lived and breathed to see him everyday. I know other people here know exactly what I am talking about. The last few years of our relationship where they best they ever were. We had everything, money, house, jobs. We were traveling the world. We were supposed to goto Japan in September and this week we were supposed to be road tripping in Idaho. obviously Idaho is not happening now.  I may goto Japan still with my SIL, as I still need to keep living my dreams.  But he had a dark side he was hiding. Paralyzing anxiety. He never ever talked about suicide the whole time anyone knew him. In fact he never really seemed to many issues with depression that I KNEW of. But in the last 6 months, he started talking about his paralyzing anxiety, anxiety over almost anything and everything, strangers talking to him, work,  his unstable family, he did mention it seemed to be getting worse. A few months ago he came to my room and broke down and said he was doing really bad and even said he had suicidal thoughts, I asked him " Are you going to take action on these thoughts?" and he said no. I chalked it up to having rough period and everyone when feeling bad can have some passing thoughts of suicide. We called a counselor on the phone and she asked him "are you going to harm yourself?" he said no. She asked him questions about his anxiety, but ultimately he didn't know why he was feeling that way. He also said to her, almost proudly "I am very good at hiding it". The last 6-8 weeks had been wonderful, we were hiking, climbing, camping and he even said he was happy on our trips. He never once brought anything up again about not feel good, and acted completely normal even up to the last day, joking and laughing and playing video games with me.  He ended his life with his gun in his car before entering work. We suspect it was impulsive, but we will never know. 

I wish I had taken it more seriously, I wish I had thought about his gun when he said suicide. 

I am a week in to this and I am very scared. Reading these forums have been helpful, in that I know my feelings are not completely unique, but scary that some people stories are also seem hopeless. I need hope. I read this thread "How long does this last?" by Donna 7431 and AceBasin has some very helpful feedback, that most people posting on this forum are 0-1year acute phase of the grief and that is why that is the major reason all the posts seem a bit hopeless as most people are still in acute phase. After the 1 year mark most posters stop as things get better, which makes sense. That is a bit hopeful.

 

I don't know what to do with myself and I can't think about the future. I haven't been back to our house and I don't know if I can reenter it. I am staying with my SIL for now. I am basically homeless now since I can't go home. It's all so overwhelming. I am on FMLA at work so I have some time before I have to think about that yet. 

Sometimes the pain is so unbearable I want to kill myself too. Like the pain just washes over me and it feels like a 1000 knives cutting into my chest, it's so painful I just want it to stop and I don't want to go through this. I squeeze my hands and move my legs. I don't know where to sit or be. I do have some medications that take the edge off and in the evening sometimes the pain will stop for just a few hours before bed and I will hide in my room and read books about grief and just be in a my 'safe space'. But first thing in the morning I wake up with a gasp as the pain immidiately washes over me when I open my eyes. I am so tired all the time sometimes I just want to lay down. I kind of wander aimlessly around, I have been doing thinks like walking to the park with friends and trying to keep somewhat active. But soon also my friends are going to have to go back to work and I will start to be alone. But sometimes being alone is not bad as their presence can't change the way I feel. 

I have a good support group and my friends have been supportive in this first week and they have been near me, it helps a little, but not much they can do. I've been to counselors too but there is nothing anybody they can say to me to make this better.

What do I do in these first few weeks? What did other people do in these first so painful days and weeks? How did you cope? Any coping suggestions, help, ideas? When did it start to get better? Do I just keep busy? When were you able to go back to work, function? How long does it last? Will I ever be functional again? Are there any hopeful stories on here that can be shared?

I am also thinking of checking myself in to a ward or going to this grief retreat www.goldenwillowretreat.com as I feel this is going to get worse to where I can't bare it anymore and just need to get checked in. 

Does anyone know anything or have any reviews about Golden Willow Retreat also? 

 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am so sorry you are going through this.  I am 36 years old too and lost my husband unexpectedly 10 weeks ago.  He also suffered from anxiety before and had taken pills to help deal with it. We don't know why he passed away though and are waiting for the autopsy report.  The paramedics believe it was a heart attack but we won't know for certain until we get the report. 

The first few weeks I was busy planning the memorial and I honestly don't know what else I did. People would stop by to see us others would call but I was taking so much medication to get through it that I don't have too much memory of those first couple weeks. 

I went back to work  at 6 weeks but  I really don't know if I was ready at that point.  I was just worried that they would need to replace me if I didn't.  I am only working 3-4 days a week and only 3-5 hours a day right now though. I told them that that was all I could handle and they have been really understanding. 

I think the best advice I received was to Just try to take everything one day at a time and sometimes even one minute at a time.  I'm still doing that.   Just keep posting here.  I have found this place to be comforting being able to talk to others that are going through similar situations. I have lots of family and friends wanting to support me through this and that is great but they don't understand like the people here do. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
15 hours ago, darkshadowgirl said:

What do I do in these first few weeks? What did other people do in these first so painful days and weeks? How did you cope? Any coping suggestions, help, ideas? When did it start to get better? Do I just keep busy? When were you able to go back to work, function? How long does it last? Will I ever be functional again? Are there any hopeful stories on here that can be shared?

I am sorry this has happened to you.  Its unbearable.  The first few months were all the same for me.  Nothing got better.  All I could do was walk and walk and walk and eat food.  I could not talk to people for very long and I could not concentrate to do any work or watch entertainment.  I got some medication for the anxiety starting after 30 days and took it for several months.  The doctors tried some antidepressants on me but those made it worse.  Only later did I find out you should never take anti-depressants while in grief.  For me this has been and is the most miserable experience on earth.  I still want to die every day but I can function now.  I can go to class, study, work, read a little, and have conversations.  I still cannot watch TV and I still dont want to be here. 

My wife was 33 years old and I feel robbed of a life every day.  Since you are young you are going to have these feelings I am guessing.  Not sure.  Everyone is different but from what I have read the feeling of highway robbery is how younger people feel which is why so many young widows and widowers die following the death of their spouse.  Dont let anyone fool you.   You are in a dangerous spot and I hope you get the support you need from both family, grief groups, here, and professionals.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Darkshadowgirl,

I am sorry for your loss.  I am at 12 years and I choose to keep posting because I want people to see that grief evolves, it doesn't stay the same, you can live through this, it takes a lot of work.  I strongly advise seeing a grief counselor, especially loss to suicide, it's very hard.  There is also a suicide loss section on this site so you might try it too.

I haven't heard of Willow, but it's worth a try.  I lead a grief support group, everyone says it's helping, usually you want to wait a couple of months before trying that and if you don't like one, try another.

As he said, he was very good at hiding his anxiety, I hope to God you don't feel responsible...usually we do and have to work through that.

http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2012/12/grief-and-burden-of-guilt.html 

http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2012/10/seeing-specialist-in-grief-counseling.html 

http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2010/04/finding-grief-support-that-is-right-for.html 

My best advice...
 

TIPS TO MAKE YOUR WAY THROUGH GRIEF

There's no way to sum up how to go on in a simple easy answer, but I encourage you to read the other threads here, little by little you will learn how to make your way through this.  I do want to give you some pointers though, of some things I've learned on my journey.

  • Take one day at a time.  The Bible says each day has enough trouble of it's own, I've found that to be true, so don't bite off more than you can chew.  It can be challenging enough just to tackle today.  I tell myself, I only have to get through today.  Then I get up tomorrow and do it all over again.  To think about the "rest of my life" invites anxiety.
  • Don't be afraid, grief may not end but it evolves.  The intensity lessens eventually.
  • Visit your doctor.  Tell them about your loss, any troubles sleeping, suicidal thoughts, anxiety attacks.  They need to know these things in order to help you through it...this is all part of grief.
  • Suicidal thoughts are common in early grief.  If they're reoccurring, call a suicide hotline.  I felt that way early on, but then realized it wasn't that I wanted to die so much as I didn't want to go through what I'd have to face if I lived.  Back to taking a day at a time.
  • Try not to isolate too much.  
  • There's a balance to reach between taking time to process our grief, and avoiding it...it's good to find that balance for yourself.  We can't keep so busy as to avoid our grief, it has a way of haunting us, finding us, and demanding we pay attention to it!  Some people set aside time every day to grieve.  I didn't have to, it searched and found me!
  • Self-care is extremely important, more so than ever.  That person that would have cared for you is gone, now you're it...learn to be your own best friend, your own advocate, practice self-care.  You'll need it more than ever.
  • Recognize that your doctor isn't trained in grief, find a professional grief counselor that is.  We need help finding ourselves through this maze of grief, knowing where to start, etc.  They have not only the knowledge, but the resources.]
  • In time, consider a grief support group.  If your friends have not been through it themselves, they may not understand what you're going through, it helps to find someone somewhere who DOES "get it". 
  • Be patient, give yourself time.  There's no hurry or timetable about cleaning out belongings, etc.  They can wait, you can take a year, ten years, or never deal with it.  It's okay, it's what YOU are comfortable with that matters.  
  • Know that what we are comfortable with may change from time to time.  That first couple of years I put his pictures up, took them down, up, down, depending on whether it made me feel better or worse.  Finally, they were up to stay.
  • Consider a pet.  Not everyone is a pet fan, but I've found that my dog helps immensely.  It's someone to love, someone to come home to, someone happy to see me, someone that gives me a purpose...I have to come home and feed him.  Besides, they're known to relieve stress.  Well maybe not in the puppy stage when they're chewing up everything, but there's older ones to adopt if you don't relish that stage.
  • Make yourself get out now and then.  You may not feel interest in anything, things that interested you before seem to feel flat now.  That's normal.  Push yourself out of your comfort zone just a wee bit now and then.  Eating out alone, going to a movie alone or church alone, all of these things are hard to do at first.  You may feel you flunked at it, cried throughout, that's okay, you did it, you tried, and eventually you get a little better at it.  If I waited until I had someone to do things with I'd be stuck at home a lot.
  • Keep coming here.  We've been through it and we're all going through this together.
  • Look for joy in every day.  It will be hard to find at first, but in practicing this, it will change your focus so you can embrace what IS rather than merely focusing on what ISN'T.  It teaches you to live in the present and appreciate fully.  You have lost your big joy in life, and all other small joys may seem insignificant in comparison, but rather than compare what used to be to what is, learn the ability to appreciate each and every small thing that comes your way...a rainbow, a phone call from a friend, unexpected money, a stranger smiling at you, whatever the small joy, embrace it.  It's an art that takes practice and is life changing if you continue it.
  • Eventually consider volunteering.  It helps us when we're outward focused, it's a win/win.

(((hugs))) Praying for you today.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Darkshadowgirl,

This is a tough new reality you are in. Sometimes it doesn't seem like it can or will get better. There will be feelings of fear, regret, sadness, anxiety, loneliness, anger. These are normal and to be expected. They can come alone or all at once and often you don't see them coming. For me, I try to just ride the feelings like a wave coming to shore. Like the ocean, when you see the wave you can't avoid it, you just try to ride it out as best as you can. There may be days when there is wave after wave and it doesn't seem bearable. When this happens, we are here for you. Come here and post. Cry, scream, yell. Whatever you need to do to express what you are feeling. We will be your sounding board. We will be here to listen without judgement and to hopefully provide comfort to you. Like Kay said. Self care is important. You may not feel like it but you have to eat. I lost 15 pounds in the first month after Lori died and it wasn't on purpose. I just didn't want to eat(who am I fooling, I didn't want to do much of anything). I took a month off of work and it was pretty much a haze. That's something you're also experiencing, that foggy numbness or haze. That's your body's defense mechanisms kicking in to shield you from the extreme pain and sadness. 

My cousin lost her husband to suicide 2 1/2 years ago and her daughter has an ongoing photo/story project that let's those affected by suicide and those that survived a suicide attempt to tell their stories. I hope you can find some comfort there if you so choose to visit. 

stanleysessions.com

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the comments. I am not doing well today. I couldn't sleep literally a wink last night, I've been up all night. Memories keep flooding in and haunting me. The memories are he hardest, so many good ones, I can't believe it's over! How  could he have done  this! The pain, it's torture. I have taken some meds that does cut the pain down a little.

I am at the house alone with my thoughts, I feel uncomfortable alone. Maybe I should go back to work, but I feel way to emotionally unstable to do that either. Time is moving in ultra slow motion, seconds are ticking by like hours. I am trying to watch a show, but I can't focus on anything but reading grief books. I have no interest in anything. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/5/2017 at 7:07 AM, Eagle-96 said:

 

My cousin lost her husband to suicide 2 1/2 years ago and her daughter has an ongoing photo/story project that let's those affected by suicide and those that survived a suicide attempt to tell their stories. I hope you can find some comfort there if you so choose to visit. 

stanleysessions.com

 

This website is helpful, thank you for sharing. Your right it is like waves, but it hard to focus or function with these waves crashing over me. How do you manage it?  I hope your right that it gets better and your right it doesn't seem like it will, but more experienced grievers all seem to agree it will get better. I have to try to believe that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 minutes ago, darkshadowgirl said:

This website is helpful, thank you for sharing. Your right it is like waves, but it hard to focus or function with these waves crashing over me. How do you manage it?  I hope your right that it gets better and your right it doesn't seem like it will, but more experienced grievers all seem to agree it will get better. I have to try to believe that.

When I feel a wave of emotion like fear, anger, sadness, loneliness, regret(sadness and second-guessing are the ones I get the most) coming on I don't try to avoid it if I can. We can only avoid grief for so long before it can have negative affects on us both physically and emotionally. If I am alone it is easier to just let the wave take me as the crying and breaking down are not hidden from anyone. I just let the emotion out. Sometimes when I get into a really strong one where I am weeping and screaming Lori's name, I wonder what my neighbors must think. If I feel it coming on in public I try to stow it away until I can be private. That may be walking to a bathroom, walking away from a crowd, going to an office room, etc... It may also be waiting until I get home and then facing the emotion and working through it. Working through it can mean crying, screaming, talking to your spouse, meditating, smiling and laughing at a good memory(yes you can and will smile when the feeling hits you. It's ok). Sometimes when the waves come you ride them out for a minute or two. Sometimes it can take an hour or more. Sometimes you will feel down all day. I never know the timeframe and I never know when they will come. There can be triggers that set the waves in motion. For me it's when I see a TV show we liked, pass a favorite restaurant, see a picture of her on FB or a text from someone. I can feel it coming and know that I may be in the ocean for a few seconds or a few hours. Don't be afraid to have these emotions even in public. BUT when you have these emotions try to end it with at least one happy memory of your husband. It may be his favorite food or a pet name he had for you. It can be a fun moment you shared on a date or a song you shared. I pray that you will find your way but remember that we are here to help guide you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
36 minutes ago, Eagle-96 said:

When I feel a wave of emotion like fear, anger, sadness, loneliness, regret(sadness and second-guessing are the ones I get the most) coming on I don't try to avoid it if I can. We can only avoid grief for so long before it can have negative affects on us both physically and emotionally. If I am alone it is easier to just let the wave take me as the crying and breaking down are not hidden from anyone. I just let the emotion out. Sometimes when I get into a really strong one where I am weeping and screaming Lori's name, I wonder what my neighbors must think. If I feel it coming on in public I try to stow it away until I can be private. That may be walking to a bathroom, walking away from a crowd, going to an office room, etc... It may also be waiting until I get home and then facing the emotion and working through it. Working through it can mean crying, screaming, talking to your spouse, meditating, smiling and laughing at a good memory(yes you can and will smile when the feeling hits you. It's ok). Sometimes when the waves come you ride them out for a minute or two. Sometimes it can take an hour or more. Sometimes you will feel down all day. I never know the timeframe and I never know when they will come. There can be triggers that set the waves in motion. For me it's when I see a TV show we liked, pass a favorite restaurant, see a picture of her on FB or a text from someone. I can feel it coming and know that I may be in the ocean for a few seconds or a few hours. Don't be afraid to have these emotions even in public. BUT when you have these emotions try to end it with at least one happy memory of your husband. It may be his favorite food or a pet name he had for you. It can be a fun moment you shared on a date or a song you shared. I pray that you will find your way but remember that we are here to help guide you.

Yeah it's different everyday. Yesterday I was numb, and felt nothing for a whole day. It was good/bad. I liked escaping the emotional pain, but the mental pain was still there since I know he is still gone. Your right I need to ride these waves of pain, I just feel pain in my heart, and I pretty much feel it all morning and afternoon. I'm a bit scared of it and want to turn it off, but want it at the same time. I know I just need to feel it, go through it, but it is so hard. I feel like a sick or ill person.   I can calm down in the evening and v sometimes I get a few hours without pain. 

 

Ughh. This pain is such a burden. I hate this. Why did he have to do this to me!?

 

I'm struggling with this suicide, I wish it was a car accident, then he didn't proposely do this to me...

 

Do I have to do this pain? I want to turn it off so bad, it's so hard.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

darkshadowgirl, My heart goes out to you. I am deeply sorry for your loss. This is still very fresh for you and I can tell from reading your posts the raw pain you feel. I know that raw pain so well myself. My husband passed of sudden cardiac arrest. I was in shock, numbness, for a long time. The pain was like being slashed to shreds by an invisible knife, unrelenting, no escape. others here have given you compassionate words of consolation and advice. Do not deny the grieving, ride it out. I know it hurts so much, but we have to let the anguish out.

41 minutes ago, darkshadowgirl said:

I know I just need to feel it, go through it, but it is so hard. I feel like a sick or ill person.  

In a way, you are right. Our body, mind and heart suffered a traumatic blow. It takes a very long time for the shock to wear off and our minds to process our loss. That is why self care is so crucial at this time. Rest or try to sleep when you can. I know that is impossible right now because it is hard to turn the mind off from thoughts and images. Do the best you can in resting. Stay hydrated and try to eat small amounts throughout the day. Our body needs fuel to sustain us through our pain. Is there a family member or close friend that can stay with you for awhile? My daughter stayed with me a week at a time twice during the first month and a half. I don't know how I would have handled it if she hadn't been here. Just to have another person in the house didn't make the days and nights so frightening and lonely.

This is a safe forum to come to for just reading others posts or expressing your feelings when you have no where else to turn. We are here for you. (HUGS)

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, KMB said:

Is there a family member or close friend that can stay with you for awhile? My daughter stayed with me a week at a time twice during the first month and a half. I don't know how I would have handled it if she hadn't been here. Just to have another person in the house didn't make the days and nights so frightening and lonely.

That was important for me during the first month. I either stayed at friends houses or had someone staying with me. Just having someone in the house was a big help. Didn't need to even talk. Just someone being there physically meant the world to me. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah in the evenings. But during the day no. I'm trying to keep myself busy but it's not helping. I don't know what to do. I kinda want to check into a hospital maybe.

 

When you feel the pain is it burning sensation in your chest that goes on and on?

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

darkshadowgirl,

2 hours ago, darkshadowgirl said:

This is so damn hard.

  Yes, I agree! It is d@mn hard and even worse. If you are having a physical burning sensation in your chest, please go see your doctor or the ER as soon as possible.Get yourself checked out for a possible heart issue and hopefully the least of your worries are anxiety attacks which can be relieved with a med. (HUGS)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear darkshadowgirl….The first week after my husband passed away was so busy with funeral arrangements it was kind of a distraction from the pain.   Although, I was so distrait that I physically could not eat.  My stomach was in knots.  I lost 8% of my body weight.  I am still numb from the loss.   Lately, I seem to be having more good days than bad days.  You asked what we’re doing to cope.  I started reading books on grieving and talking on the phone a lot to friends and family.  My sister was the biggest help as she lost a son to a drug overdose and she could really relate to the pain I am feeling.  We have spent hours talking and sharing.  We are closer than we have ever been.   One of the most helpful things I have done is keep a journal.  I started journaling on the 10th day after Frank died and I have not stopped.  It helps me in many ways.  I note my feelings that I have during the day along with thoughts and memories.  I talk to Frank and I talk to God.  Journaling helps me to organize my thoughts.  My journal is my record of progress.  And yes, I think I am making progress one day at a time.   Also, reading others posts also helps.  It’s comforting to know other people are going through the same things as I am.   You realize you are not the only one.  Thank you for sharing your story.  I am so very sorry for your loss.   Andrew  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 hours ago, Eagle-96 said:

When I feel a wave of emotion like fear, anger, sadness, loneliness, regret(sadness and second-guessing are the ones I get the most) coming on I don't try to avoid it if I can.

Smart!  Grief has a way of hunting us down and finding us, so there's no sense in trying to avoid it.  You can, however dole it out in doses and take breaks from it, if you're able to muster it.  I've learned to let it come, like waves crashing, and ride the waves.  If I feel like crying, cry.  If I feel angry, let myself feel it.  If I'm overcome by missing him, I experience that.  It will do what it will anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 hours ago, Andrew 521 said:

One of the most helpful things I have done is keep a journal.

Good idea!  I've also found that expressing myself it's cathartic.  It restores some of the power we lost when they were taken from us without anyone consulting us.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So now for the past two days I have felt nothing.  On Thursday I went from being almost suicidal in pain to now feeling nothing. I can recall memories and I feel nothing, were before there was pain? This is all very strange. I wonder if my body is trying to protect itself by turning off emotions??? Though I do have to admit, it does feel a little relieving to not have to feel all that pain.   Anyone else experience going from heavily painful emotions to no pain suddenly?  While relieving, it feels a bit odd. It seems to change everyday. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, darkshadowgirl said:

So now for the past two days I have felt nothing.  On Thursday I went from being almost suicidal in pain to now feeling nothing. I can recall memories and I feel nothing, were before there was pain? This is all very strange. I wonder if my body is trying to protect itself by turning off emotions??? Though I do have to admit, it does feel a little relieving to not have to feel all that pain.   Anyone else experience going from heavily painful emotions to no pain suddenly?  While relieving, it feels a bit odd. It seems to change everyday. 

Happens all the time. Day to day I never know what I am going to get. Some days I wake up and feel pretty good(reasonably speaking) and think I am doing great. Then out of nowhere the grief monster comes storming out of the shadows and I get hit. Just as I try to ride out the emotional waves, I also take the emotional up times as well. I don't fight it either way. You are also correct in that your body can, and will, shield you from the pain at times. Just let your body do its thing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, darkshadowgirl said:

So now for the past two days I have felt nothing.

I know that *numbness* all to well. I feel it is the body and minds way of giving us a break from the intensity of the pain and other emotions. I'm sorry to say, but the best way is to go with the flow of what you feel. The grief monster, as Eagle refers to it, comes, stays for awhile, leaves and can come rushing back like a train. We never know from day to day what we have to try to cope with and ride out. Be patient and kind to yourself. I know how hard this is.  (HUGS)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 07/07/2017 at 7:23 AM, darkshadowgirl said:

When you feel the pain is it burning sensation in your chest that goes on and on?

 

Yes. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So much so that we can get physical symptoms from our grief, that's why we're encouraged to see a doctor when we're grieving.  This is painful inside and out!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Today I am angry. I am f ing pissed off that you had everything. You had nothing to complain of, no financial problems, no marital problems, a beautiful house, good looks, youth, health, good jobs, vacations, loving wife, a beautiful Earth to explore and you cared nothing for it. F it all!! Right!? Everything we built meant nothing. You and your f-ing mommy issues. You randomly blurted out, 6 days before you died, "What's the point of this!?"  when we were hiking in a beautiful field. At the time I thought you were complaining of the hike. I now think you meant that existentially.  What's the point of this!? The point is to appreciate life!! You didn't. You lose it. So f you. I'm going to enjoy the f out of life just to spite you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can appreciate your anger, you have every right.  Sounds like a plan.  (((hugs)))

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

darkshadowgirl, KayC is right. You have every right to your anger. Every right to express it. It is one of the emotions reflecting your pain. Working our way through this journey of grieving takes a lot of effort and we experience many emotions repeatedly. You have a plan in place, a goal for yourself, that is all good.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0