Members Brennonsmomma Posted May 24, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 24, 2017 It was May 14th, 2016 at 12:06 when I got the phone call from my sons ex-stepdad who works EMS & Fire rescue. He was called to the scene because the rescue and sheriffs who were on the scene recognized who it was right off the bat. They asked him to please come quick they needed a positive ID they told him they feared it was Brennon. I saw my ex husbands name come across my phone at 12:06 pm May 15th 2016. I knew something terrible has happened cause he never calls with good news. I immediately started asking, " What happened?! What's wrong?! What's going on?!" With no emotion he said,"Tiffany, Brennons dead." I kept asking what did you say? I didn't hear you right. Again, he said Brennons dead. Im asking how do you know? Are you sure? Again with no emotion he said, "Tiffany I'm standing over him now its Brennon!" I fell to the floor and lost it screaming! Later, two cops showed up at my door to explain what happened. He was drinking at his party thrown at "his friends house" right off the highway. Well his ex-girlfriend and her brother showed up. He explained he didn't want them there. There was a verbal fight and they told him to go walk it off. He obviously had way too much to drink to be walking by his self. So as he was walking and trying to call for a ride home he was walking back and forth across the highway. He was in the median when cars were honking, pulling over, and calling 911 to try to get him help. When he heard a car honk they said he acted as if maybe he knew who was honking at him so he stepped off the median towards the car that was stopped on the other side when an SUV hit him. He was thrown a ways then landed back in the median, where now stands a huge cross that I painted with his favorite designs and colors. His first year Death-Aversary landed on Mothers Day this year and what would have been his 22nd Birthday the day after that. We were exceptionally close and best friends. I'm questioning what happens after death because someone saw my son standing where he was hit a few months later, and after a car accident involving my sons basically "second mother figure" was involved in they took pics of the car. When I saw them on fb something told me to go over every single picture very carefully. Sure enough, my sons face just as clear as could be was in one of the pictures. My sons friend who was in the accident said she saw Brennon after she was hit. She said he helped her out of the car, sat with her till paramedics got there and helped her on the stretcher. With his sudden death and taken before his time, along with the sighting of him standing in the street and his face captured in a photo of the car that she claimed Brennon was with her the whole time is truly messing with me. His death alone has destroyed me but with evidence he might be around somehow? I don't know if that helps me or hurting me more. All I ask myself is, is he ok? Does he hurt? Is he confused? Does he know he's dead? The worst thing is that I'm his mother and have no way of helping him or consoling him. Please if anyone has any advice please respond! Or can relate in any way? I have three daughters with me still. A 23 year old, 16 year old, and 2 1/2 year old. I help take care of my mother and my husband has been in Japan serving the Navy since a month before all this has happened. I would love to have something? Anything? That anyone could share that might help. I'm so lost and overwhelmed. Thank you so much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members My girl is in heaven Posted May 25, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 25, 2017 Brennonsmomma. So truly sorry for the loss of your son. You have so much on your plate with caring for your other children and mother on your own. I dont know what to tell you about other people seeing your son. On this website we have all had different experiences and signs from our children. Please be assured Brennon is not suffering and is in total peace. One of our moms, Tommys mom, is a nurse and she has told us about her experiences with people passing. There are a lot of parents here and we have all been where you are. If you go to Loss of an adult child that is where every one posts and there are a lot of kind and caring parents. I totally feel the pain you are in and understand all the questions you have. Losing a child is the most horrific thing anyone can experience. Please, please, know you are not alone. We are all here for you and will wrap our arms around you. If you want to email me my address is ltaylor50@ rogers.com. If you want someone to call you I can do that to. I will be here for you in anyway I can. Please come to Loss of an adult child and let us help you. Hang in There, you can do it. Luanne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members flocicero Posted May 25, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 25, 2017 Hi Brennonsmomma, I am so very sorry for your loss. The overwhelming pain and grief that you are experiencing is normal and well understood by this group. I lost my precious son 2 1/2 years ago, I honestly dont know how time has continued to move.... Since my son's death, I personally have drawn closer to God and find comfort in this. I have always believed in an afterlife and now more so. Ive been doing a lot of reading about psychic mediums and I do believe there are very legitimate folks out there that can connect with those that have crossed. My sister went to a medium a year ago for her own personal reading but my son came through which was unexpected and there is no way this person could've known specifics of my son's childhood; my sister didn't even know. ... Our children are with us ,i absolutely believe this. ..Im preparing to have my own reading, though I must admit, I'm apprehensive. ....I haven't participated on this site for a while, but I do read from time to time. ...the parents here helped me to keep going and I love everyone for all they have done and keep doing to help newer bereaved parents to find hope....hope was a word I didn't understand in the beginning. ...now I do....God bless... Love always, Francesca...Mikes mom forever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jesse David & Taylor Mom Posted May 25, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 25, 2017 Brennonsmomma, I read your story tonight. Yes, I absolutely know that we continue on...my mom saw my son after he died a few weeks afterward. Also, the day my son passed, a friend who had her son pass about 2 years prior called me. She told me how her son appeared to the paternal grandfather the same day he was killed. Her son appeared so clear that the grandfather did not even realize at first the grandson was not in physical form. I would recommend to you the group, Helping Parents Heal here: http://www.helpingparentsheal.org/ They have done quite a bit of afterlife research and are open to the experiences after death. Here is the link to their most recent newsletterhttp://mailchi.mp/6dd6e46187d4/an-update-from-helping-parents-heal?e=5c35605988 These types of matters can be a double edged sword. It has been with me. Sending gentle thoughts and prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Brennonsmomma Posted May 25, 2017 Author Members Report Share Posted May 25, 2017 47 minutes ago, flocicero said: Hi Brennonsmomma, I am so very sorry for your loss. The overwhelming pain and grief that you are experiencing is normal and well understood by this group. I lost my precious son 2 1/2 years ago, I honestly dont know how time has continued to move.... Since my son's death, I personally have drawn closer to God and find comfort in this. I have always believed in an afterlife and now more so. Ive been doing a lot of reading about psychic mediums and I do believe there are very legitimate folks out there that can connect with those that have crossed. My sister went to a medium a year ago for her own personal reading but my son came through which was unexpected and there is no way this person could've known specifics of my son's childhood; my sister didn't even know. ... Our children are with us ,i absolutely believe this. ..Im preparing to have my own reading, though I must admit, I'm apprehensive. ....I haven't participated on this site for a while, but I do read from time to time. ...the parents here helped me to keep going and I love everyone for all they have done and keep doing to help newer bereaved parents to find hope....hope was a word I didn't understand in the beginning. ...now I do....God bless... Love always, Francesca...Mikes mom forever 1 hour ago, Lou ann said: Brennonsmomma. So truly sorry for the loss of your son. You have so much on your plate with caring for your other children and mother on your own. I dont know what to tell you about other people seeing your son. On this website we have all had different experiences and signs from our children. Please be assured Brennon is not suffering and is in total peace. One of our moms, Tommys mom, is a nurse and she has told us about her experiences with people passing. There are a lot of parents here and we have all been where you are. If you go to Loss of an adult child that is where every one posts and there are a lot of kind and caring parents. I totally feel the pain you are in and understand all the questions you have. Losing a child is the most horrific thing anyone can experience. Please, please, know you are not alone. We are all here for you and will wrap our arms around you. If you want to email me my address is ltaylor50@ rogers.com. If you want someone to call you I can do that to. I will be here for you in anyway I can. Please come to Loss of an adult child and let us help you. Hang in There, you can do it. Luanne Thank you so much for your support. I just saw this today and thought I might see if it would help. I appreciate all that you shared. I may take you up on emailing or calling you. When my baby is taking her nap and no one else is here it's so quiet, too quiet. That's when I have the hardest time or when I'm in my car. Again, thank you I need all the support I can get. I have never felt a pain or had visions like I've had. Thank you darlin and I pray for your peace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Brennonsmomma Posted May 25, 2017 Author Members Report Share Posted May 25, 2017 1 hour ago, Lou ann said: Brennonsmomma. So truly sorry for the loss of your son. You have so much on your plate with caring for your other children and mother on your own. I dont know what to tell you about other people seeing your son. On this website we have all had different experiences and signs from our children. Please be assured Brennon is not suffering and is in total peace. One of our moms, Tommys mom, is a nurse and she has told us about her experiences with people passing. There are a lot of parents here and we have all been where you are. If you go to Loss of an adult child that is where every one posts and there are a lot of kind and caring parents. I totally feel the pain you are in and understand all the questions you have. Losing a child is the most horrific thing anyone can experience. Please, please, know you are not alone. We are all here for you and will wrap our arms around you. If you want to email me my address is ltaylor50@ rogers.com. If you want someone to call you I can do that to. I will be here for you in anyway I can. Please come to Loss of an adult child and let us help you. Hang in There, you can do it. Luanne 58 minutes ago, flocicero said: Hi Brennonsmomma, I am so very sorry for your loss. The overwhelming pain and grief that you are experiencing is normal and well understood by this group. I lost my precious son 2 1/2 years ago, I honestly dont know how time has continued to move.... Since my son's death, I personally have drawn closer to God and find comfort in this. I have always believed in an afterlife and now more so. Ive been doing a lot of reading about psychic mediums and I do believe there are very legitimate folks out there that can connect with those that have crossed. My sister went to a medium a year ago for her own personal reading but my son came through which was unexpected and there is no way this person could've known specifics of my son's childhood; my sister didn't even know. ... Our children are with us ,i absolutely believe this. ..Im preparing to have my own reading, though I must admit, I'm apprehensive. ....I haven't participated on this site for a while, but I do read from time to time. ...the parents here helped me to keep going and I love everyone for all they have done and keep doing to help newer bereaved parents to find hope....hope was a word I didn't understand in the beginning. ...now I do....God bless... Love always, Francesca...Mikes mom forever I went to a medium and she was spot on with so much. She literally told me everything that happened. What he use to wear and who he left behind. I'm trying to find a legit clairvoyant so I could maybe have a chance to communicate with him. I haven't found one that I believe in yet. I just can't let go. Thank you so much. I need all the help I can get right now. I just want answers as we all do. With love thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tommy's mum Posted May 25, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 25, 2017 brennonsmomma I am sorry you lost your son so tragically. he will be ok where he is, people are always fetched by loved ones, family or friends that have already passed over. It is us, the bereaved family, that mourn and have a hard time adjusting. Your Brennon is by your side always you just cannot see him for now but you will again at the end of your natural lifetime truly. He came back to help your friend in the accident and you were able to see his face in the FB photo to show you he is ok. We all long for "signs" from beyond and they are usually quite infrequent, we just need to trust and accept that our children are still with us in spirit. Mediums and clairvoyants can be deceiving but there are a few genuine ones out there, be careful who you trust and pay. Some members have found comfort in their faith, whatever helps you in a positive way without trauma is good. I have yet to have a visit from my Tommy who was killed in 2015 partly because I think I am not ready to see him it is still raw. A couple of his friends have seen him in dreams and shared that with me. My time will come I am sure. in the first year we are often so clouded in our thinking so weighed down by grief that we cannot think straight. As time goes on and with appropriate treatment counselling etc a form of acceptance is finally reached. The grief journey is long and hard and very painful but on Loss of an Adult Child thread there are many parents who are willing to communicate with you and help you on your journey. Answers are what each one of us crave but there are not always answers straightaway. The "why" is the most common one and in time with healing you will realise that how your son died is not really important, what is important is the love you have for each other and as a family and that love transcends time and the universe. letting go is a strange concept, what it actually means is not letting go of your child or your memories of them, but more about being able to pick up the shattered pieces of your life and being able to start to live life again, albeit in a different way. Our children want us to thrive not just survive, and are willing us on every step of the way they want us to acheive something that gives their brief lives a meaning, and not just wither away with guilt or sadness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members My girl is in heaven Posted May 26, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 26, 2017 Brennonsmomma. I'm not sure if you are still here or have switched over to loss of adult child, but i just wanted to let you know I am from Canada and have free u.s. calling . So I can call you anytime that works for you or you have my email address and I can talk there if you want. Just what every works for you. I don't work so am always home usually. I will be here day or night. You can contact me any time. Hugs Luanne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Brennonsmomma Posted May 27, 2017 Author Members Report Share Posted May 27, 2017 On 5/25/2017 at 5:41 PM, Tommy's mum said: brennonsmomma I am sorry you lost your son so tragically. he will be ok where he is, people are always fetched by loved ones, family or friends that have already passed over. It is us, the bereaved family, that mourn and have a hard time adjusting. Your Brennon is by your side always you just cannot see him for now but you will again at the end of your natural lifetime truly. He came back to help your friend in the accident and you were able to see his face in the FB photo to show you he is ok. We all long for "signs" from beyond and they are usually quite infrequent, we just need to trust and accept that our children are still with us in spirit. Mediums and clairvoyants can be deceiving but there are a few genuine ones out there, be careful who you trust and pay. Some members have found comfort in their faith, whatever helps you in a positive way without trauma is good. I have yet to have a visit from my Tommy who was killed in 2015 partly because I think I am not ready to see him it is still raw. A couple of his friends have seen him in dreams and shared that with me. My time will come I am sure. in the first year we are often so clouded in our thinking so weighed down by grief that we cannot think straight. As time goes on and with appropriate treatment counselling etc a form of acceptance is finally reached. The grief journey is long and hard and very painful but on Loss of an Adult Child thread there are many parents who are willing to communicate with you and help you on your journey. Answers are what each one of us crave but there are not always answers straightaway. The "why" is the most common one and in time with healing you will realise that how your son died is not really important, what is important is the love you have for each other and as a family and that love transcends time and the universe. letting go is a strange concept, what it actually means is not letting go of your child or your memories of them, but more about being able to pick up the shattered pieces of your life and being able to start to live life again, albeit in a different way. Our children want us to thrive not just survive, and are willing us on every step of the way they want us to acheive something that gives their brief lives a meaning, and not just wither away with guilt or sadness. Thank you darlin, your words and advice meen so much. I'm sorry for your loss the pain is overwhelming and never seems to get any easier. I hope you too are finding help with the grieving process. I first went to my doctor. Then, she sent me to a therapist. I did that for 3 months then they both recommended a psychiatrist. I'm seeing a difference but have a long way to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tommy's mum Posted May 27, 2017 Members Report Share Posted May 27, 2017 it is a long long road to recover from grief and takes a lifetime although as time goes by it should ease a little. i have a psychiatrist and mental health case worker. My bereavement counsellor I saw for over a year and she was amazing. I credit her with my recovery. My medications and sleeping tablets help too but it is always a great sadness. It is really important to face up and deal with this sadness though otherwise it haunts you forever. By dealing with what happened you gradually come to some kind of peace and acceptance although it will always seem unjust and unfair to lose a young life so full of potential, a missing member of your family. keep sharing and take care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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