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Lost my Mom, everything is crashing down


hmb1508

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Hi,

So I realised most people on here are a bit older than I am but I am really struggling right now and I don't want to worry the people I love with my problems. When I was 7 my Mom was diagnosed with a cancer. She suffered for 6 weeks and then died. It was a terrifying moment especially since I was only 8 when she passed. I ended up moving countries and starting a new life with my dearly loving father, except his wife and I don't exactly get along. It has been almost 6 years since my mother passed and I am now 13. I never really felt like this, mainly because I tried my best to not think about it. Tomorrow is Mothers Day, I thought about it about 10 minutes ago and all of a sudden I started feeling really dizzy and it felt like my stomach just dropped. I don't want to talk to my family about it because I don't want to worry them, and my friends, well I don't want their sympathy. I don't know what to do, and I am really panicking as I have exams coming on Monday but I just cant focus on anything. I don't know why it is only affecting me like this now, and I just need some help.

Hannah

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Dear Hannah,

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please know you are not alone. I think your family and friends would want to know how you are feeling so they can support you. You are only human and the loss of your mom is a major moment in your life. We all cope differently with pain and sorrow. Sometimes we put it away and then the emotions will come up at another time. Grief is different for all of us. I found this link in Australia that I think might be able to help you find someone to talk to:

https://kidshelpline.com.au/teens

Please don't be afraid to reach out for help. Talk to a grief counsellor, join a support group, write in a journal, and there are these websites called What's Your Grief and The Grief Healing Blog that have a lot of good information.

We are all here for you. Thinking of you and sending you all my thoughts and prayers.

 

 

 

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I'm really sorry for your loss.  If you feel unwell and the dizzy spells become reoccurring, please speak to your dad about that.  Not that there's necessarily any major medical problem behind it, I don't want to worry you like that, but b/c it could be something like dehydration or low blood sugar that's being compounded by grief.  Better to let your dad know than to faint and hit your head or something.  

Grief can be tricky like that though.  Maybe something triggered it, maybe entering into a new phase in your life brought it on.  Take some time for yourself and then focus on studying when you can.  Your health and mental health will always be more important than exams.  

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