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Helping to bring the number down


Anthonybarela

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Anthonybarela

Hello,

my name is Anthony barela. I am so sorry for everyone's loss here. To date in the United States teen suicide is the number two cause of death among teens. My brothers and I would like to help bring that number down as significantly as possible. We are doing an informal survey right now in hopes of starting a nonprofit organization that will help bring counselors to schools every single quarter to just simply ask our children how they are doing. To give them help. Today, schools are stretched thin and many counselors have as many 600:1 ratios to help our young people. We would like to bring our counselors in and bring that ratio down for a few days and help our teens. Another aspect would be to lend our ears to stopping social media bullying. Today kids are not simply bullied at school they are bullied 24 hours a day 7 days a week. As parents ourselves we understand how difficult it is to constantly protect our children when it feels we do not have the weapons to protect them. If anyone would volunteer to answer these questions on this forum or in a direct message it would be of great help for us to move forward and start to find better ways to help our children. I truly appreciate your time and again I am truly sorry for your loss. 

1. Would you support counselors going to your child's school and talking to them individually every quarter?

2. Would you as a parent take a social media course to help navigate your child's social media without compromising their privacy?

3. Do you as a parent feel the school system is doing enough about bullying? Please explain either yes or no. 

4. At what age do you believe bullying becomes the biggest problem?

5. Finally do you believe that there are enough programs in place to help you and your child feel happy and safe?

 

thank you so much for your time. Let's end teen suicide and protect our children together. 

 

Thank you,

anthony barela 

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Tommy's mum

Anthony I appreciate your kind efforts in trying to lower suicide rates. I lived in PA for 18 years and my 4 kids went through elementary and middle school there. My two eldest graduated high school before we returned to the UK in 2011. my eldest was bullied because he had red hair. My youngest daughter was bullied at times by the popular group mainly being excluded by them or having friends join the group and then dropping her. I found USA schools to be very much more cliquey than UK schools. My two younger children found it hard to settle into the Uk at first because they were American and the kids had preconceived ideas about Americans but then it was ok. My children are now all older but i would be happy to give my input because it would benefit future children.

1 yes. 2 yes. 3 no. Children are afraid of telling and having further repercussions from the bullies. We need to teach more about bullying and exclusion in schools so kids feel safer. Having class buddies to stand by bullied kids is strength in numbers, bullies are essentially cowardly and surround them selves with others as a show of force. Having a system where no one sits alone at lunch or is alone in the playground would really help. Also for the bullies to be held accountable for their actions. In my case and in several of my friends children's cases the child being bullied had to change classes or go to the counsellor. this makes them more of a target and the victim. the bullies should be called in with their parents and made to change classes and have counselling too, and sign a contract stating this behaviour must stop. if not they should have appropriate punishments or suspension to show that schools are taking this seriously. . cell phones should be disabled in school hours to prevent texting bullying. School bus drivers should be trained to report incidents on their bus to the school. 4 it can happen at any age, however preteens to seniors is most prevalent. 5 no. The emphasis needs to be that it is a safe environment to tell because actions will be taken against the bullies and that no child should feel alone and vulnerable. i wish you luck with your project. I hope you get more replies but grieving parents may not be in the right space to be able to participate.

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Anthonybarela

Thank you so much for your response. I do agree that grieving parents may not be in the right space at the moment to answer. We are currently working on get this out to as many sources as possible. Our goal is finally answer that true problem of kids being afraid to tell because of, repercussions from the bully, not being believed, or being told they are being too "dramatic". One thing that you were absolutely correct on is getting the bully counseling as well. We hope to not only be able to help our young teens  overcome bullying but help the bullies themselves get help. In most cases, the bullies do not understand the gravity of what they are doing. We would like to change that. Again thank you so much for your response. Every response will help us grow the right way to solve problems for our young people. 

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