What does it feel like when you start to heal?

[fletch14]

I lost my mom on March 5th - the most horrific day of my life. Since, I have been in a black hole of sadness and grief... at times curling up in a ball crying, and other times numbly stumbling through my days.

Lately, I haven't been crying as much. I am wondering what it feels like when you start to heal, and resume any sort of normalcy in your life. I assume there are lots of ups and downs, but how do you know you are moving forward in, what feels to be, this never ending saga of sadness?

[reader]

Dear fletch14,

I'm so sorry for your pain and sorrow. I know its hard.

Its been 6 months since my dad passed. I don't know if I am really moving forward or just existing sometimes. I try to find some joy every day but even those short moments of joy remind me that my father is no longer here.

I found this link about how do you know when grief is getting better:

 

http://connect.legacy.com/inspire/page/show?id=1984035%3APage%3A3306

 

I hope it helps. Take care. Thinking of you.

[missdad]

Fletch14, So sorry about your mom. My dad died March 20^th, so it’s also pretty recent. I start thinking I am doing better and bam! I am having a meltdown and crying hard. But my crying jags seem to be a little less frequent. I noticed the other day, I did not think of my dad when I first woke up, which I had been. I have more frequent moments when I don’t feel so empty. I think it’s a gradual process that is not a straight path. I am not sure how you know when you are moving forward, but I think the intensity of the sadness will get less frequent and less intense.

I am hoping eventually; certain things bring a sense of comfort and peace. I hope when we think of our parents it’s kind of with a feeling of nostalgia instead of sorrow. Like I have two kids who are preteens. I think of times when they were little and get a little sad and nostalgic because I miss those days, but I don’t feel intense sadness. While a loss is not the same thing, I hope the feeling is more that way. I am probably making no sense, so I hope you get my meaning.