Have you volunteered at a shelter? Was it a positive experience?

[I miss my girld]

I think I'm going to start doing this, but I'm a little nervous about it. Since my baby died in January it has been difficult for me to be around pets because none of them are her. I did have a positive experience with my aunt's cat, but in general I've sort of been ignoring cats in a way that feels very unlike myself and looks on the surface like indifference. I'm also a little bit worried that being around animals who need homes that I am not willing to give them will just intensify my feelings of guilt. Thoughts? 

[KMB]

Hi,  I wish I had an answer for you. Maybe just try volunteering for a day or two to see how you handle it. Explain your situation so the understanding is there if you find it is too difficult to be around animals for now. I'm sorry for your loss. It took me 10 years after I lost my buddy, to have another cat. My first buddy I had for 14 years and we were close. I also had a busy life in that 10 year span, so I didn't think it fair to have another cat I couldn't devote time to. When I got my next cat, I lost her outside to a coyote when she was only 6 months old. I suffered with guilt for awhile. The cat I have now, actually came from a litter born to the parents of that lost kitten. She was the last of that litter and I took her since she was a sister to the one lost. She's going on 12 now. Sleeps with me and brings me comfort.

[KayC]

I think KMB's idea was a good one, it'd give you an idea of how you feel without jumping into the permanence.

[I miss my girld]

Thanks, KMB and KayC. I think I'm going to try it out. Even if it doesn't make me feel better, it will be a worthwhile and helpful thing to do.