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Lost my 33 year old wife - six months out


bradley1985

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3 minutes ago, Eagle-96 said:

I feel the same way sometimes. When the news said that North Korea now has a nuclear missile that could reach the US I just shrugged and said "so what". It felt strange to not care if a bomb hit my city and I was killed. With my luck, I'm sure I would be the only one spared death.

Yes i also want that, i wish any country start world war and use nuclear missile or anything happened to me only like heart attack or anything so that i can go. 

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Yesterday I had lunch at Costco and visited with an elderly lady that lost her husband 14 years ago.  She seems to be at the same place I am...not a day goes by but what she doesn't miss him and think about him.  Another couple was trying to give her a pep talk (think on the bright side, etc.) which invalidates her feelings so I jumped in and steered the conversation to validation and empathy.  They clearly didn't get what it's like.  She didn't need talked out of her feelings, she needed listened to.

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10 hours ago, Eagle-96 said:

I feel the same way sometimes. When the news said that North Korea now has a nuclear missile that could reach the US I just shrugged and said "so what". It felt strange to not care if a bomb hit my city and I was killed. With my luck, I'm sure I would be the only one spared death.

I think along those lines also when I hear the news.Tthen I think of the kids and wish them to be spared. But, I would willingly go up front and center and sacrifice myself for them. They are enjoying life to the fullest, but I cannot find it in myself to join them. My heart is too heavy with sorrow.

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7 hours ago, KayC said:

Yesterday I had lunch at Costco and visited with an elderly lady that lost her husband 14 years ago.  She seems to be at the same place I am...not a day goes by but what she doesn't miss him and think about him.  Another couple was trying to give her a pep talk (think on the bright side, etc.) which invalidates her feelings so I jumped in and steered the conversation to validation and empathy.  They clearly didn't get what it's like.  She didn't need talked out of her feelings, she needed listened to.

Bravo for you KayC, in coming to her defense!:)

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9 hours ago, KayC said:

nother couple was trying to give her a pep talk (think on the bright side, etc.) which invalidates her feelings so I jumped in and steered the conversation to validation and empathy.  They clearly didn't get what it's like.  She didn't need talked out of her feelings, she needed listened to.

Good job KayC.

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I know your pain I lost my husband on 09/23/17. I don't know how to go on without him. Everything seems useless. It hurts so bad and I don't know how to accept it. I just wanted to let you know I understand.

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