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Little brother murdered

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My little brother was murdered two years ago.

I was a brand new mother at the time and I think I've been on autopilot the whole time. The trauma was so horrifying and overwhelming and I needed to be there to experience of joy with my baby. Even so this has robbed my ability to really enjoy my baby the way I should. I'll never get that back.

His murderer's trial is almost finished and it's all hitting me. I'm so depressed and hurts my whole body every day and I miss him so much.

His life was a very sad and troubled one filled with suffering and that was really hard on us but now that he's gone it is devastating that there is no more hope he'll get better or get to be happy.

I'm codependent and am working hard to set boundaries with others and care for myself. I see now why I tried to avoid being alone with my feelings. It feels like I am drowning in sadness and horror and anger and anxiety.

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I am so utterly sorry about the loss of your brother and the trauma surrounding it all. It sounds as though you truly may need to seek some professional advice in how to deal with all that you have experienced. 

I hope your family finds justice, and I hope you can begin to heal when the trial is over. 

If you feel like talking about what happened, we will be here to listen. Talking is the best way to heal. 

We will be here with you,


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