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Lost my sister four years ago but I've never felt worse..


Steve Cavanaugh

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Steve Cavanaugh

Hey guys.

I initially joined this site to cope with my fiancee's death who died last year but now that I think of it, I miss my twin sister so very terribly.. Probably it's the effect of both these losses that has brought me here. My sister died in the October of 2012. She was my twin sister and we were so terribly close. And when she died, nothing was the same. We shared everything in our lives, hell, we even shared a uterus. But it didn't impact me that drastically because my Sophia (my fiancee) healed me and helped me get over the pain and I was fine. In my tough times, Sophia and Lehanna were the two girls who really helped me, if you exclude Mum. But now the whole realisation that neither Sophia nor Lehanna is there to help me, hug me or just stroke my hair is too painful to bear.

 

I honestly believe that the relationship between siblings is the most underrated relationship in the world. When Lehanna died, people constantly pitied my parents, Lehanna's 1 year old daughter and her husband. Nobody for a moment thought how me and my brothers and sisters would feel.We had lost our dear sister after all.

When the world didn't understand, I know you guys will. That's why I'm here..

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Dear Steve,

I'm so sorry for your losses. I know the pain is unbearable. You cherished your sister and her love. It is very hard on siblings. It is a connection that we expect to last long after both parents have passed and not before. Reading about grief some have suggested having a ritual will help. Perhaps you and your siblings can find some way to honor your sister together. This could be as simple as going to her favorite restaurant on a regular basis. Have her favorite foods and give her a toast at the table. I know you will also be there for your niece and share with her all your wonderful memories of her mother. Thinking of you during this difficult time.

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