Jump to content
Forum Conduct & Guidelines Document ×

Back to work


B7176

Recommended Posts

  • Members

After several attempts, I have returned back to duty. Yesterday marked a month since my boyfriend donated his organs and left me here. It's like I'm in a fish bowl at work. I guess they are waiting for me to burst into tears. So awkward! I've been here for about 6 hrs and already been told "you need to move on," "it's his fault he died" and "don't kill yourself because you have a son and you will not go to heaven." People are unbelievable! Through it all, I held back my tears and continued my work. I miss him so much. All I can think about is him. I wish this wasn't happening. I'm making progress I guess. One day I will return to our apartment. I feel so alone. Lord please help me! 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

B7176:

I'm sorry you had to endure such insensitive comments.  Sometimes, I think if people would just think before they speak, they'd realize how heartless they sometimes sound.  Know that God is your strength and with him you can overcome any obstacle. Jesus, while on the cross, asked his father to forgive them for they do not know what they do; you forgive your co-workers, for they do not know what they say.    

Of course you miss your loved one - you're suppose to;  I too miss my husband of nearly 45 years.  I'm glad you've returned to work, it may relax your mind for a time, but if you need to cry, don't hold back, let the tsunami come and know that God knows your deepest thoughts and desires and loves your unconditionally. He will stand by you when others have gone and is always ready to listen to whatever you need to say; guide you to where you need to be and will never leave you.  Know you are the child of the Most High, the Creator, the Ultimate Comforter.  

You have been entrusted to care for that beautiful baby.  Make sure he knows his father, the love you shared for one another and for him.  Tell him his dad will always be with him in spirit and is always watching over him.   God Bless you and that beautiful baby and keep you both safe.  Hugs and Kisses!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I worked across the desk from my girlfriend. I used to think and say how wonderful my life was, that the one I loved was with me at work, where we could be together. And then after work we always planned our evening. We might eat out, catch a movie, or just go to one of our places to talk, or for more...

I did go into work the day after I learned of her passing. Since she was also an employee, everyone at work felt terrible. We canceled all business matters for the afternoon and just spent the time talking, reminiscing, and mourning the loss of a life so young.

I took the last two days of the week off, and I may also take tomorrow off, but eventually I have to go back. Eventually I have to return to my work, just another reminder of her absence, another agony at the end of each day where I can no longer ask her what she'd like to do for supper... 

Its going to be hard. And a lot of the feelings will resurface. I'm scared.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Francine, 

Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Fzald,

I'm sorry you have to go through that. I'm glad your coworkers are kind, postive, and understanding. Hang in there! I wish I can offer some encouragement or advice how to hang in there but I have no idea how I'm surviving. That feeling of emptiness is unbearable. God Bless!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators
3 hours ago, B7176 said:

After several attempts, I have returned back to duty. Yesterday marked a month since my boyfriend donated his organs and left me here. It's like I'm in a fish bowl at work. I guess they are waiting for me to burst into tears. So awkward! I've been here for about 6 hrs and already been told "you need to move on," "it's his fault he died" and "don't kill yourself because you have a son and you will not go to heaven." People are unbelievable! Through it all, I held back my tears and continued my work. I miss him so much. All I can think about is him. I wish this wasn't happening. I'm making progress I guess. One day I will return to our apartment. I feel so alone. Lord please help me! 

Wow!  I guess I'll always be surprised at the things people say no matter how much inappropriate stuff I've heard.  I've consoled myself by saying to myself, "Of course they don't know what to say, they haven't been through it!  And thank God they haven't!"  Even some who have lost someone to death, they may not grasp what we're going through because their relationship or love was different, perhaps theirs wasn't as all encompassing or amazing as ours.  For myself, I'm glad I got to experience true love, no matter how hard the cost.  He will always be worth everything to me.

I developed some real moxie when my husband died.  When people would say stupid things to me, I'd say something back, not just take it.  Right or wrong, I was going to teach/correct them of the error of their ways.  I know they "meant well" but sometimes people should just shut up.  Maybe they should just say they're sorry and leave it at that.  Maybe they should stick to a sympathy card or a casserole dish, it'd be better than telling you to move on or it's his fault!  Good grief!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

This site uses cookies We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. and uses these terms of services Terms of Use.