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Lost my husband suddenly in a car accident

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I'm new to this forum but hoping this will help. My husband died instantly in a car accident December 16th, 2016.  He was on his way home from a job to help me get ready for a Christmas party with our family on Saturday.  Our 26th anniversary is tomorrow, Feb. 1st.  I feel like I've been having a really bad dream for a few weeks and maybe I'll wake up soon.  I can't seem to get rid of that nauseous feeling when I wake up in the mornings and he's not there.  We have a small business so we were together almost all the time and both liked it that way.  He was my best friend and I miss him so much. I seem to spend a lot of my time thinking about what if....  He asked me to ride with him that morning, but I had to much to do to get ready for the next day.  I usually drove when we were together.  I was told he went around a corner to fast and over corrected and the truck flipped.  It was just so sudden. I didn't get to say goodbye.  He was 57.  We were making plans to retire and now I feel like I don't have anything to look forward to anymore. Prayer has helped me so much when I start to feel like I can't handle the loss. But, just seem like the tears won't stop.  I've never done anything like this so I hope it will help. 

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Tressy,  I am so sorry for your loss. I know what you are going through. We all feel like we can't wake up from this nightmare we are caught up in. The pain is horrendous. My story is similar. My husband and I ran a business together. He was ready for retirement and we had just started the process of dissolving it when he passed.

I hope you are taking care of yourself. You probably don't have an appetite but a few small bites to eat throughout the day will help, along with plenty of water. I found myself losing a lot of weight and becoming dehydrated. I had no interest in anything. I was in a brain fog and still am to some extent. Have you considered grief counseling? I hope you have support of family and friends. It is crucial to have a support system, especially in the months ahead. The grief and the reality hit hard, at any time. The loss of your husband, your best friend, your everything. We are so lost without them. He is with you in spirit, still loving you.

This forum is a good one. Many warm and caring people here for you to share with. If you would like to, come over to the loss of partner thread. That is where we all are.

My prayers are with you. Just breathe. One day at a time.

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I too am so sorry for your loss. You are not alone! 

My father died the same day my son was born! My father died at 5:08am and my son was born at 11:46am. He was a fire fighter, police officer and EMT. Every year I'm reminded by my son's birthday of that painful day. For years, I've tried to figure out how to manage the hurt and I've come to this conclusion. I must except the facts but is there anything I can do to make the pain of losing me easier on my family when I pass away. Then I asked myself "what is it that would make my pain a little easier to deal with regarding my father". The answers were videos! I wish I had videos of my father. Not home videos but videos of him speaking directly to the camera from his laptop or cell phone telling my how much he loves me and reassuring me he will see me again. Maybe even a video wishing me a happy birthday. The possibilities are endless in what he could have made for me. So, you know what I did? I'm having a website built to do just that for everyone in the world to have. I'm taking my hurt and giving back to the world. I want everyone to have what I don't have. A chance to ease the pain by letting people create and upload personalized and confidential videos that they can leave for their loved ones. The website is called "Psily" pronounced (sigh-lee) and is the acronym for p.s. I Love You. I thought it would be a good name for the site.

I am designing the site with everything I would want from my father like being able to create photo slide shows with background music, create audio files like a family member singing you happy birthday that you can listen to whenever you want, themed pages, just an overall very nice website. Think of it as a time capsule so to speak. CD's get broke, phones break, messages get lost, phones get stolen, computers crash. On my website, everything will be safe from all that and only the people you want can see the content you've made for them can see it. Some families aren’t functional so we don't want a video made for a step mother or father to be seen by the biological parent, unless you want them to see it. There are many details going into this. I hope my hurt can help you as it will many others. You can find me on Facebook if you search "Psily" or the link is below. If you comment or message me on there it will be me you're speaking with. Please feel free! I'm a good listener. 


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