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      Advertisements   09/05/2017

      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie
kelly

Coping with the Holidays

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I don't usually like to indulge in self pity but this is the 4th year without my husband.  We didn't have any children and his family doesn't keep in touch with me.  I have 5 sisters who all have their family coming for Christmas dinner.  I have been invited to one of their houses but I think I just want to be alone.

I keep remembering how much my Mother loved Christmas.  She would wrap the gifts with matching wrapping paper and ribbons and put glitter on them.  there  was always a gift for everyone.  She would hide gifts around the house for us girls to hunt for.  She just made Christmas special. 

Now that I am alone and live alone, I don't even decorate for the holidays.  I don't exchange gifts with anyone which also means that I don't get any gifts to open.  I know Christmas is not about getting gifts but when you had good Christmas memories for 55 years, then they stop it is hard sometimes.

Sorry for the down post but I know I am not alone.  I guess I just need to go out and buy myself something for Christmas and put a smile on my face.

 

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A friend of mine just gave me a plaque for Christmas that reads-

Merry Christmas From Heaven

I still hear the songs,I still see the lights

I still feel your love on cold wintery nights

I still share your hopes and all of your cares

I'll even remind you to please say your prayers

I just want to tell you,you still make me proud

You stand head and shoulders above all the crowd

Keep trying each moment to stay in His grace

I came here before you to help set your place

You don't have to be perfect all of the time

He forgives you the slip if you continue the climb

To my family and friends please be thankful today

I'm still close beside you in a new special way

I love you all dearly now don't shed a tear

Cause I'm spending my Christmas with Jesus this year

By John Wm Mooney Jr.

 

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bdzack   

I agree, Thank you so much for sharing this poem.  It brings a tear of course, but it is beautiful.  It helps give me the strenght to go on........

Bdzack

 

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solemate   

Hello to everyone on the boards.  It will be the third Christmas without my beloved parents. The third anniversary of their deaths will be in March next year, a time when I will again be in Ireland to remember them with my new found relatives.  Christmas this year is a little different for us.  A new home has meant new feelings and not having to relive the traumas of their deaths.  I have tried so hard to come out of the dark places that have haunted me.  I have still a little way to go but I know that I am on the road to a better place than where I was.  It takes a great deal of hard work and support to start to feel like a real person again.  Alas my only sibling sister is still estranged from me and it seems that she is happy in her own space.  I am still under doctors care and have found that major depression/post traumatic stress has also had a terrible reaction to my physical being.  I have planned to have a happy christmas filled with laughs and good cheer.  I know there will be some quiet time when I shed a tear or two (or three) but I have invited some friends from the local soup kitchen whom I know well.  Last year was a sad time for me and I know that my parents would not want me to continue to me so sad about their losses.  I have some wonderful memories of my parents and will honour them tomorrow by lighting two candles for them and two for my husbands parents.  My prayers are always with the many people who post on the boards and I wish you well for the Christmas season.  Be kind to your self and let your feelings be real and personal to only yourself. Kindest regards  Gayle (Australia) :)

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Dear Gayle, I just wanted to say I am so grateful to have met you and I hope you will have a blessed NewYear.

I have been experiencing some depression and resultant physical issues as well.  I hope that you are doing better. Glad you have you family and friends around. I have mine but as usual not the most demonstrative/nurturing people.

Missing my Dad terribly this year, as I know you are you Mom and Dad.

Well, you and DH are in my thoughts and prayers.

Cryingeyes aka Regina

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solemate   

[user=14435]cryingeyes[/user] wrote:

Dear Gayle, I just wanted to say I am so grateful to have met you and I hope you will have a blessed NewYear.

I have been experiencing some depression and resultant physical issues as well.  I hope that you are doing better. Glad you have you family and friends around. I have mine but as usual not the most demonstrative/nurturing people.

Missing my Dad terribly this year, as I know you are you Mom and Dad.

Well, you and DH are in my thoughts and prayers.

Cryingeyes aka Regina

Hi there Regina, I have just read your posting - thanks for the support. Depression is a nasty thing - I thought I was better and asked the local doctor "when can I get off the depression tablets" He just looked at me and said "we will talk about it in 2 months time - you have had a very terrible experience (s) and you need time to mend" I thought about those words, and yes although we sometimes feel ready to be called "normal again" we do need to take things slowly (albeit, weeks, months or years) physical issues can also be a problem.  I hope that you have a careing doctor who you can confide in and work through each of your issues. My family is really only my husband, son and daughter.  I do see my nephew and speak with him regularly. Alas my sister and her husband have chosen to not be receptive to my invites.  

I found that my pushing myself oneday to walk into a church reception area and offer as a volunteer for a soup kitchen was the best thing that I have done.  New people, new conversations, new friends.  Maybe a new 'thing' for you will be of some help.  I too miss my Dad (and Mum) and have somehow found the energy to say that its OK to miss them. (maybe the doctor is right - stay on the tablets a little longer!) I am sure that you will find the prayers that can support you and the love that you have for your Dad.  Its OK, things will work for you - just try and take one day at a time and try hard for some 'me' time even if its just a walk.  Love to you and take care - Gayle

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kelly   

Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields

- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.

- Facebook and Twitter Integration

- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"

- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.

- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board

- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it.

- Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible.

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other.

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com.

Kelly Baltzell, MA

CEO/President

Beyond Indigo Family

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