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Tragically Lost My Dog of 15 Years


Insanewith

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On Saturday Dec. 3rd, my 15 year old dachshund-cocker spaniel (Brandie) fell into our pool and drowned. I told my dad everyday and even that morning that he had to stay outside with her so this wouldn't happen. She was losing her eyesight and couldn't swim in her old age; besides that the water was freezing. I wasn't home at the time, and I know my dad is absolutely distraught. I feel guilty because Brandie knew it was my job to protect her and I wasn't there. Before my mom died of cancer in 2010, she told me to take good care of Brandie and I feel like I have let them both down. I knew I had to make that dreadful decision soon to part ways with Brandie, and I even asked my dog in silence that morning when I would know it was time to let her go. Perhaps she made that decision on her own. I still can't shake the guilt of not being there when this happened. I got her on my 8th birthday and she's the only dog I ever had. 

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I'm so sorry for the loss of your companion, Brandie. She's a lovely dog! Do not feel guilty for what happened. You couldn't have known. You were living in the moment when you couldn't be there to watch out for her. Maybe her going to Heaven was meant to play out this way. Maybe she didn't want you to be there to witness her passing in a vet clinic at some point. Brandie lived a very long life with a lot of love from you and her family. Because she had been the only dog you've had, I understand how emotionally devastating it is. I remember when my children and I lost our first dog at a young age to cancer. We were all still crying weeks later. We all still remember that dog and now we think of and talk about her with love and memories. You'll get to that point later also. For now, you'll be grieving and it's going to hurt. Take your time. Pets are family and we grieve for their loss just as if they were a person we lost. I believe that animals have souls, just as people do. She'll still be with you spiritually and might even leave signs of some kind, letting you know she is still there. Prayers and hugs to you.

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1 hour ago, KMB said:

I'm so sorry for the loss of your companion, Brandie. She's a lovely dog! Do not feel guilty for what happened. You couldn't have known. You were living in the moment when you couldn't be there to watch out for her. Maybe her going to Heaven was meant to play out this way. Maybe she didn't want you to be there to witness her passing in a vet clinic at some point. Brandie lived a very long life with a lot of love from you and her family. Because she had been the only dog you've had, I understand how emotionally devastating it is. I remember when my children and I lost our first dog at a young age to cancer. We were all still crying weeks later. We all still remember that dog and now we think of and talk about her with love and memories. You'll get to that point later also. For now, you'll be grieving and it's going to hurt. Take your time. Pets are family and we grieve for their loss just as if they were a person we lost. I believe that animals have souls, just as people do. She'll still be with you spiritually and might even leave signs of some kind, letting you know she is still there. Prayers and hugs to you.

Thank you so much. Not many people close to me seem to understand that she was my family. After all, we did grow up together. I had this habit of triple checking she was safe inside before going to work and I feel like it was fate's way of telling me this was going to happen eventually. I think you are right about her wanting to let go while I wasn't there because I'm sure she knew saying goodbye was already going to be incredibly difficult. The house was already so empty when my mom passed but I can't even begin to describe how empty it is now. I am so sorry about the loss of your pup, losing a furry companion is just so heart wrenching and awful. Sending hugs and prayers to you and your family!

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Hello Jenna.

Thank you for your message to me regarding Bodie, I can't tell you how much it comforts me to know that I'm not alone.

Know that you give Brandie the best life she could have imagined, you can tell she was your little baby girl and she must have felt so loved. 

Don't blame yourself for what happened, you had no control over the situation  and Brandie knows that, it was such an unfortunate thing to happen but as you told me, Brandie will be playing happily at rainbow bridge with Bodie and all of the other souls! 

I am sending you all of my love, if you want to add me on Facebook you can do so:

Sophia Louise Evans 

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Insanewith,

I am so sorry you lost your Brandie.  I know as her protector you are feeling guilty because you weren't there, and yet you couldn't possibly be there all of the time.  We just feel responsible for our pets, the same as we would our children.  But there are times we have to trust them into the care of others.  I'm sure your dad feels horrible.  Maybe he was distracted, maybe he didn't take it seriously, thought she'd be okay going out on her own.  I can't imagine how bad he must be feeling.
I have found this article to be very helpful, and I hope you'll read it:

http://media.wix.com/ugd/0dd4a5_e934e7f92d104d31bcb334d6c6d63974.pdf

And this one:
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml

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8 hours ago, Sophia23 said:

Hello Jenna.

Thank you for your message to me regarding Bodie, I can't tell you how much it comforts me to know that I'm not alone.

Know that you give Brandie the best life she could have imagined, you can tell she was your little baby girl and she must have felt so loved. 

Don't blame yourself for what happened, you had no control over the situation  and Brandie knows that, it was such an unfortunate thing to happen but as you told me, Brandie will be playing happily at rainbow bridge with Bodie and all of the other souls! 

I am sending you all of my love, if you want to add me on Facebook you can do so:

Sophia Louise Evans 

Thank you Sophia, I sent you a friend request so we can stay in touch and share our beautiful memories of our lovely furry friends. I am sure Brandie and Bodie are enjoying each other's company at rainbow bridge and talking about their amazing families on earth with each other. I look forward to talking more with you. xx 

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5 hours ago, KayC said:

Insanewith,

I am so sorry you lost your Brandie.  I know as her protector you are feeling guilty because you weren't there, and yet you couldn't possibly be there all of the time.  We just feel responsible for our pets, the same as we would our children.  But there are times we have to trust them into the care of others.  I'm sure your dad feels horrible.  Maybe he was distracted, maybe he didn't take it seriously, thought she'd be okay going out on her own.  I can't imagine how bad he must be feeling.
I have found this article to be very helpful, and I hope you'll read it:
http://www.veterinarywisdomprofessionals.com/resource_center/help_for_clients/client_handouts/a_dangerous_villain_guilt

And this one:
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml

I greatly appreciate you sending me those articles. It was almost like they were directed at me and I am going to use those tips to change my thought process into something more positive. It's true, I know this was not my fault but at least I can say that I was very, very protective and cautious with Brandie. My dad isn't one to show emotions or talk much but seeing him cry over this made me realize how absolutely terrible he is feeling. I hope he can learn to forgive himself, I can't even imagine how painful it was for him to try to do CPR after he had yelled at her earlier. We do plan on getting another dog, but it will take awhile for us to grieve, forgive, and move forward.

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Insanewith,

All of us have times we've spoken harshly or yelled or something and then after we lose the person or dog, those times come haunting us, but the truth is, when we're living our lives with them, we're not thinking we'll be losing them.  After I lost my husband eleven years ago, that all changed for me...now a day doesn't pass but what I'm mindful that this could be our last.  Grief changes us.  Life is never the same again.  I think since I adopted my dog and my cat, not a day has gone by but what I realize my time with them is limited and to enjoy each and every moment.  Still, there's times I've gotten on to them for doing something...it's just part of being a pet owner.  I hope your dad can forgive himself, he did, after all, really care.

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