Jump to content
Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
  • Announcements

    • ModKonnie

      Advertisements   09/05/2017

      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'sucide'.



More search options

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Forums

  • How do I _____ on the forum?
    • Help/Questions
  • Newsletters
    • Newsletters
  • Join Us on Social Media
    • Facebook
    • Pinterest
  • Loss of.....
    • Loss of a Parent (Mother or Father)
    • Loss of a Child
    • Miscarriage, Stillborn and Infant Loss
    • Loss of a Partner
    • Losing Family and Friends
    • Loss of a Sibling
    • Loss of a Pet
  • Violent Death
    • Suicide Survivors: Help for People Left Behind
    • Sudden/Violent Death in the Family
    • Grieving Teens
  • Caregiving & Terminal Illness
    • Caregiving and Grieving
    • Coping with Terminal Illness & Upcoming Death
  • Grief Issues
    • Grief and the Legal System
    • Coping with Loss
    • Anger and Grief
    • Grief Support
    • Difficult Backgrounds: Making Grief Worse
    • Marriage Issues
  • Spiritual/Religious Beliefs
    • Beliefs and Religion
    • Prayer and Blessings
    • ADC's, Visions, & Dreams
  • Non-Death Losses
    • Losses as a result of illness or injury
    • Biological Stranger
    • Loss of a Job
    • Divorce
  • Difficult Events
    • Coping With Holidays
    • Grief and War
  • Recommendations for Healing
    • Recommendations for Healing
  • Please tell us....
    • Recipes to Remember
    • Beyond Indigo Reunion
    • Beyond Indigo Pins & Wrist Band
    • Your Beyond Indigo Friendships
    • If you want to participate in the following...
    • Your Beyond Indigo Story
  • Archive
    • Archived
  • Introduce Yourself

Calendars

  • Community Calendar

Group


AIM


MSN


Website URL


ICQ


Yahoo


Jabber


Skype


Location


Interests


Loss Type


Angel Date


Occupation


Interests


Last Name


First Name


Zip


Country


About Me

Found 1 result

  1. This June I lost my mother. She overdosed on pills in her bedroom above mine. She had struggled with depression, anxiety, and ptsd for as long as I can remember. The past 3 years though have been really tough. She was a lot more volatile and mean, but just for short periods then she'd go back to the amazing caring kind hearted person she was. It was always hard to tell if she was serious when she'd get that way. She'd always talk about running her car off a bridge or something along those lines but in a angry revenge way not a suicidal way. We had gotten even closer the past few years which I'd think would be hard to do with how close we already were. She was my best friend. The week of her suicide started off great. We found I was going to graduate college early after several dropouts and hardships on my end. Then I found out I was going to lose my scholarship and she didn't have enough money to pay my tuition. Which triggered not only her guilt of thinking she was a bad mom but her ptsd of my abusive biological dad. Every solution my adopted dad and I came up with wasn't good enough. She started to get in this cycle and couldn't get out of it. The night she killed herself was the worst. She had taken her sleep medicine to sleep through out the day. So when I had come home from class she was asleep. I woke her up and offered to get us dinner which she accepted. I then went out to get food, when I came home I woke her up again and she didn't remember our conversation and got really angry at me saying that she was going to leave me and my dad and that we'd be happier without her. I told her that was stupid and that I'd leave her food out for her. When she finally came down stairs several hours later I went into the kitchen to talk to her. When I walked by her she tried to flip my drink out of my hand. To which I got angry and lashed out asking what her problem was. She replied me being alive was her problem. To which I told her maybe I'd go crash a car somewhere and stormed out of the house where she followed me and told me not to take the nice car then. That was the last conversation I had with her. When I got home I had found she'd locked me out of the house and had to call and wake up my dad to let me in. I then spent 2 hours debating calling 911 cause she had been acting so weird. I decided to wait till morning to avoid her wrath. I woke up 5 hours later went up to her room. By the time the EMTs arrived she was gone. Everytime I walk into my house all I can see is how she looked when I found her. I blame myself so much its consuming my life. Everyday gets harder not easier and I don't know what to do.
×