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I find myself questioning God, first my father unexpectedly passed away on Father's Day 2008, one month shy of his 51st birthday and now my 33 year old sister overdosed and passed away on the 18th of January and all I have are question's, so many what if's. I am so afraid of there not being any after life, never seeing my loved ones ever again and if I am never going to be with my loved ones again then really what's the sense of living? It feels pointless