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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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Rebekahs mom

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About Rebekahs mom

  • Rank
    Advanced Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Loss Type
    Loss of adult child
  • Angel Date
    December 17th, 2017
  1. Loss of an Adult Child

    Yes I'm Sarah (rebekahs mom). I'm glad I'm not imagining things...thanks for the advice. Great idea Samantha! Today is beautiful out going to take the pup for a walk.
  2. Loss of an Adult Child

    Margarett--i have days like that was well. I cant see certain things and i instantly think of her and feel like i want to crawl out of my skin. Like you have said colleen about answering how many children I have I think I will just say 5 and move on. The last week or so I have been feeling edgy and frazzled in the evening. Quick with the other kids and just want to disappear. I think what's happening is it's the same time the 1st police phoned my home to confirm address at 630ish and 750ish he arrived to inform us. I think unconsciously I'm always thinking of it. So far today is ok. It's been 10 weeks this morning, but no tears yet. I'm sure it will happen this evening . Hope everyone is doing as good as expected. Xoxo
  3. Loss of an Adult Child

    So strange the last couple of days I have the Christmas Carol and specifically the verse... "I'll be home for Christmas, you can count on me"..it goes through my mind at the oddest times. I wonder If it's rebekah in a way letting me know she's at peace. Like I've said before Christmas...I will never look forward to again. Dec 17th is our Angel date. Just thought I'd share. Xoxo hope you are all doing ok. Thanks for the replys everyone I read and appreciate them all.
  4. Loss of an Adult Child

    Margee--how awful...2 days before you knew! i can't sleep much either. I really enjoyed hearing stories of your boy. I found initially I couldn't remember anything good..just imagining her lifeless body. When we saw her 5 days after (took them that long to get her home) she didn't look like her. Clearly they tried to resuscitate. I just wish I could stop focusing on what I could have or should have done. Take care xoxo
  5. My daughter

    My heart goes out to you broken mom. I replied to your initial post. Just know we are all here if you need to talk..you can message me anytime..I don't sleep well. Take care.
  6. Lost my 18 year old daughter to sepsis

    Broken mom-- I'm so terribly sorry for the loss of your daughter. You did all you could and as a nurse who has worked in ICU I know how fast things can change. Tommys mom advice is excellent. I too lost my 21 yr old daughter Dec 17/17. I'm glad you found the group no one wants to join. It has been helping me and I hope you get some comfort from this group to.know what you are experiencing is normal. Sarah xoxo
  7. Loss of an Adult Child

    Margee--im so happy you made supper! Yhe pics are beautiful. You need to celebrate doing anything....I feel doing what I used to tho k as mundane things in the past as heroic now. I actually applied to a full time permanent job as an NP. Before I could be seeing up to 20 patients a day ordering refills to pharmacy and talking to radiology. I thought applying to the job I was doing for over a year was a good thing to accomplish the other day. I too read back over the years and it's helpful to read. Just wish I could fadt-forward the time to somewhere I wasn't in so much pain all the time.
  8. Loss of an Adult Child

    What a sweetie:)
  9. Loss of an Adult Child

    The last few days weren't good. Reached the 2 month mark and I realized my patience with my other children is thinning. The odd thing that I just became aware of is that evenings were very difficult I will get very restless and feel like my skin is crawling. I realize now it was between 630-740 that we were initially informed a police officer had to "discuss something in person" with me. Took over an hour for him to show up to confirm what I already suspected. Some good moments and some bad all the time.
  10. Loss of an Adult Child

    Such a senseless tragedy
  11. Loss of an Adult Child

    I have been having ups and downs. Yesterday was a good day. Tomorrow is the dreaded 17th...2 months since we lost her. Overall I think my head is in the right place today. That can change a million times as we know. Hope everyone is doing as best as expected. How are you Margaret, samantha and Adams mom? Xoxo
  12. Loss of an Adult Child

    Niquesmom-sundays are my days. Will be 8 weeks for us this Sunday. I find it more difficult this past week than before despite meds. I have 4 other living children so I know I have to be here with them but echo your statement I want to be with my daughter. They tell us it gets better in time...that's what I cling to. I was mad yesterday at my daughter for putting out family through this i know it was unintentional but this has destroyed me. Damn stages of grief. Then I feel guilty. Your picture is beautiful your little guy definitely needs you. You are doing all you can.
  13. Loss of an Adult Child

    Television meaning cable
  14. Loss of an Adult Child

    I'm sick just seeing this. I'm Canadian and I actually don't have television and haven't really been online so this is the first I'm seeing if this. 8 shootings since 2018!! It's only 8 weeks into the year. What a scary world we live in
  15. Loss of an Adult Child

    Tinay, I'm so sorry for the loss of your daughter. After she first passed away I frantically read and re-read all of our texts and messages. Watched any recent videos I could as well. I think at that time I was grasping on to some hope this wasn't real. I've now saved them and may look at them again but no time soon. I also know that feeling is this real life? I literally had a melt down last night and said the same thing for almost 2 hours. I can tell you everything you are doing we have done the same. I don't know when or of this gets easier. My daughter has been gone almost 2 months it will be the 17th. For me the 17th sickens me. I hope that in this group you will get some benefit. There are other members that have lost children years ago and tell us we can make it..it feels impossible at first but it will happen. That's what I cling to.