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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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    • ModKonnie

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      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie

Nico

Members
  • Content count

    3
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About Nico

  • Rank
    Newbie
  • Birthday 10/03/1992

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Not Telling
  • Location
    Colorado
  • Loss Type
    Father
  • Angel Date
    4/2/2017

Converted

  • First Name
    Nico
  1. I believe my dad is still with me

    After my dad passed away I swear I felt him hugging me while I was crying, my mom also told me she felt a heat on her leg as if his hand was there. I think a lot of people won't leave at the very least until they know you'll be able to keeping going without them.
  2. I had a similar experience, my dad passed away this April and I was the only person living with him for a few reasons, he and my mom got a divorce when I was in middle school, my sister was living with her partner, and I was still with my dad because I don't yet have a job and I have some mental health issues that make it hard to live by myself anyway, so I ended up being the one to find him. He'd been really sick the day before and came home from work early, he worked as a flooring installer and he was working in a hospital that day and his coworker had tried so hard to talk him into walking into the ER since it was literally right there, but my dad had always been stubborn and he insisted it was nothing that serious, so he drove himself home and asked my grandparents to pick him up some medication for what he assumed was heat exhaustion. When I woke up the next morning around 10 am he still wasn't awake, which was really abnormal for him, so I went to his room to see if he was okay and found him with his eyes wide open and not breathing, I could tell the second I saw him, but I still tried to shake him awake before calling the paramedics. Within a few hours most of my family was there, my sister and her partner, my grandparents who were in shock (I can only imagine how awful it was to hear that their son passed away before them), and my aunt and uncle (my dad's sister and her husband). My mom lives in another state, but she was out here the next day. None of us saw it coming and it was a horrible shock to everyone, when we hear back from the coroner we found out he died from an untreated heart condition that had been likely caused by drinking and smoking (as I said, he as stubborn when it came to his health and hadn't seen a doctor for anything in years). Being the one to find someone is unimaginably painful and I'm not sure I'll ever get the image of how he looked out of my head, and it's been hard not to blame myself for not demanding that he go to the hospital even though I know he'd have refused no matter what I said, I'm not even sure they could have saved him. I'm lucky enough to have already been seeing a good therapist who's helped me work through a lot of it, it'll never stop hurting, but I hope you can manage to keep going and work through what happened to your own dad.
  3. I'm in the same boat with my dad, he passed away this April, this will be my first Thanksgiving without him. It'll be hard and it's going to hurt like crazy, I'll be spending the day with my sister and her partner as well as our grandparents (my dad's parents), so all of us will at least have a distraction, but that won't fix it. He was an excellent chef and there's no way we won't all notice the absence of his dishes at the table, he grew all of his own veggies so anything he made using vegetables was always particularly amazing, plus he was the kind of person who never used a recipe, he just grabbed whatever was in the cabinets and made magic. I never bothered to have him teach me how to cook more than a handful of dishes because I've never much enjoyed cooking personally, but right now I really wish I had asked him to teach me because now I'll never get to taste any of his specialties again, not the way he made them at least. So yeah, I'm with you, it's going to be a hard Thanksgiving.
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