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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie

Dani1030

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About Dani1030

  • Rank
    Newbie

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Loss Type
    Mother
  • Angel Date
    August 21, 2017

Converted

  • First Name
    Dani

Recent Profile Visitors

60 profile views
  1. I need help.

    @sadandlost Thanks for the reply. I plan on doing all that, but I just can't find the right time to go home. I guess it's going to be like ripping off a band aid. It's just something I need to do. He has bad days, but okay moments. I'm just afraid I'm going to leave him at the wrong time. I'm not even sure if I have really grieved. I feel like I have to be the strong one at all times since I'm around him so much.
  2. Its been awhile since I've been on here and over a month that I lost my mother suddenly. I have been staying with my dad ever since, but I am ready to return to my own house..a house that I'm paying rent for and not living in. My dad is not handling her death well at all..which I completely understand, but it is so hard to sit here and see him so sad. I feel like I can't begin to heal because of the sadness that I see from him everyday. What do I do? How do I go back home knowing he is so miserable? I am afraid that when I leave, he will stop taking care of himself. Honestly, he's not doing the best at that anyways..even with me staying with him. He says he understands that I need to get back to my life, but when I mention going home, he tends to have a "bad day" and that makes me stay. I just don't know what to do. I only live like 5 minutes away. Does anyone have any tips on how I should go about this? I would appreciate any help that I can get. Thank you!
  3. Thank you all for your kind words. Cindyjane...I think your dad said it best. We will never get over it, but we will get on with it. I worry about my dad more than myself. He is retired and doesn't do much. I'm afraid that once I leave and go back to work, he will just sit at home and do nothing. I'm afraid he won't take care of himself either. Only time will tell I suppose. Again, thank you all for just allowing me to vent and express how I'm feeling. I just need help navigating through this new life without my best friend, my mom.
  4. Today I feel angry and jealous. I'm jealous of others who still have their mothers. I'm jealous of those who don't have to sit with their grieving father, and feel completely helpless. I'm angry at all those who aren't feeling this emptiness and sadness. I'm afraid that my feelings aren't okay. I can't express them to anyone without feeling like a piece of crap. Has anyone else felt like this before or am I crazy?
  5. Lost my mother at 21

    Kimberlynn01, I am so sorry for your loss. I am going through the same thing as you. I lost my mom suddenly a week ago. She was 60 and I am 30. She was a bit older than your mom, but was healthy so it doesn't make sense. She was my best friend. I am lost. I know she is gone, but I think deep down, I am waiting for her to come back. I also worry about my dad. My parents were together for 40 years and he swears he has nothing left. I am afraid he is going to let himself go, and I will be left alone. My brother and his family live out of state, so it is just my dad and I. We have a different relationship from what my mother and I had. We are close, but don't share things the same way that my mother and I did. Yesterday we seemed to have an okay day, but today is different. We have nothing to say, nothing to do. I've not cried, but I just don't feel anything. I know we will have good days and we will have bad days, but I don't know how I can handle these kinds of days.
  6. It's been one week since my mom passed suddenly. My brother and dad were with her, but I was in a different state. I didn't get to say goodbye like they did, but to be honest I don't think I would have made it if I was there and witnessed everything that they did. I think in a way, she died where she did so I wouldn't have to live with that memory. I feel lost..that is the best way to describe everything. She was my best friend. If I ever did anything, it was with her. I visited with her almost everyday, and if I didn't see her, I talked to her numerous times a day. I don't want to do anything. I have been staying at her house with my dad and I feel useless. I just sit on her couch and "watch" tv. I am exhausted, but can't really sleep. Last night I had a dream about her, she was in it, but I didn't actually see her. I know I'm rambling. I just wanted to find a place that I could share how I'm feeling, and hopefully find others who are feeling the same.
  7. I just lost my mom unexpectedly last Monday and we laid her to rest yesterday. She was a pretty healthy person, so we are just lost. I am 30..my mother was 60, but she was my best friend. If I ever did anything, it was with her. I pretty much saw and talked to her every single day. If I wasn't with her, I was texting her. My heart is broken, my brother's heart is broken, and most of all, my dad's heart is destroyed. My brother lives out of state and left today. I'm not angry with him, but I feel like I am the one that is left to try and pick up the pieces. I have no idea how to move on. I feel like no one understands the pain I feel even though people have lost parents before. That is why I am here. I just need to talk to someone who can comprehend this unimaginable sorrow. Please.
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