I lost my mother to suicide almost 6 years ago. She shot herself. My brother found her.Two weeks after Mothers Day, 3 days after my 25th birthday, and 10 days before her birthday. We had a strained relationship due to her mental illness, and emotional abuse, so I had a lot of mixed feelings about her death. I felt like I had come a long ways though, until recently. This christmas, my home was robbed, and they took her jewelry. Ever since, its just been over my head, and I cannot shake it. I do not want to grieve like I did 4 years ago. Spring is a really rough time of year for me, and I am dreading May. I live away from my family, and have not been able to tell them about the robbery. I have a supportive partner and friends, but talking with them just doesn't seem to help. I had a dream last night that my very nice brother had a psychtic breaj and shot me out of anger. Not long ago, I dreamt that my mother faked her suicide as a joke. We threw her a party, and she asked me where her jewelry box was. I was just wondering if anyone had any helpful coping devices beyond crying in my shower, or had experienced something similar. I know grief is a journey, but I am trying to get back to where I was, or thought I was. I do plan on telling my family, but I want to do it person, and getting away to see them is hard. I dont really expect any advice, but it's been nice to vent. Thanks for reading.