Autocharge

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About Autocharge

  • Rank
    Advanced Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Texas
  • Loss Type
    Wife
  • Angel Date
    05/25/2016

Recent Profile Visitors

72 profile views
  1. wow I thought I was pushing it ( 40 miles one way). One of the problems I'm running into is trying to find a 40 -50 year old retire, ready to travel and have fun. We were way ahead on the game of "life" , were sure to be the winners, then the wheels fall off the little plastic car. Autocharge
  2. These we our plans too. I'm now retired according to the "plan" but find the "plan" to be empty now, unenjoyable without her. I'm trying hard to kick start the "plan" but I just can't get my leg to moving. Time is passing slowly I can feel it. I do things to get me out of my comfort zone. I'm hoping this will get me to rolling on the "plan". I also feel guilty to have the possibility of enjoying the "plan" without her. We both worked so hard to get to this point in life. Only to get the wind nocked out of our sails. Autocharge copy of post to main thread.
  3. These we our plans too. I'm now retired according to the "plan" but find the "plan" to be empty now, unenjoyable without her. I'm trying hard to kick start the "plan" but I just can't get my leg to moving. Time is passing slowly I can feel it. I do things to get me out of my comfort zone. I'm hoping this will get me to rolling on the "plan". I also feel guilty to have the possibility of enjoying the "plan" without her. We both worked so hard to get to this point in life. Only to get the wind nocked out of our sails. Autocharge
  4. Getting out of my comfort zone. MEETUP.COM OK I'm back. My first thoughts are it was nice. I meet people that were in the same age bracket 40+ . There were 3 guys and 13 ladies. It was pleasant conversation and no-one asked about my late wife. We all sheared a little background info on our selfs through out the evening. The restaurant was hosting the trivia contest not the group. We played as a table and won second place. I have all ready RSVP ed to two more events. I hope this will fill some of my time now. It's not dating but the chance is their I'm hoping this will turn out to be a good balance between being alone and the scary internet dating sites. Their are a couple off other groups that I plan on checking out but will not go into details unless encouraged to or I see fit to for some reason. I don't want to be promoting some web sit on this forum. These two post were for informational porpoises only. Each to their own. Autocharge (moving forward "new normal")
  5. Ok new topic Getting out of my comfort zone. MEETUP.com This is going to be my first attempt to going to "meetup.com function". It's Trivia night, it's not like theirs any pressure from going on a date but I am a little apprehensive about meeting 15 new singles at once. Autocharge
  6. We thought our kids this and both are doing great for the most part. Their in what I call the "Spit and Polish" phase of growing up. The things I think about that not only their Mom is going to miss but how their going to miss shearing life with their mom. The possibility of Marriage and grandkids , oh how I wish my would be grandkids could have know their grandmother. That's also a reason I have saved pictures out on google and youtube ( the data will be their forever in one format or the other) and why I post to this forum. Not only are there people here that understand but it is an execelent place for documenting self thought in a public place. A place that hopefully will stand the test of time. Autocharge
  7. Mrsviden Listen to KayC. I'v been trying really hard to push the boundaries of my comfort zone hear lately(you can read bout it in my postings). Tonight I plan on attending a (meet up.org function) "Trivia Night" for singles in the local area. I don't have a very large group of friends and hate being alone now. At times I think why can't I just have it all back again. So much is missing. Sorry for the sad moment. Autocharge
  8. Andy I to am 45 and lost my wife. I know you have reed my thread. I just wanted to say I to couldn't save my wife. We were in Guam when she woke up early not feeling right. So I helped her walk to the living room were she said she had to lay down on the couch. That was the last time she ever walked. Within hours she was a quadriplegic. In four months she was gone. I read your post and feel as if I had written it, I have two kids 21 and 19. I swear brother were in the same boat together. Autocharge
  9. Moving Stuff Back in October 2016 just 5 months after my wife pasted, I was repainting the inside of the house (white). I had no problem painting our bed room. I had made changes to the bed ( removed the steal frame, it was to high now). In the process of putting things back together I didn’t put back the Head board. Thats when it hit me. I lost it emotionally, we had that head board sense the very beginning. So I placed it back even though their was no way to support / mount it. It’s still their today. You never know when or what will trigger a wave of emotion. So where am I going with this? Today (hours before the 11 month mark) I moved the picture collage that was made to celebrate her life to another room in the house. I’m doing ok right now maybe because I know it’s still in the house ( her hobby room, which I still haven’t been able to do to much in that room). I was concerned that another wave of emotions would hit but it hasn’t yet. I have read threads on here about “ What do I do with His/Her things” and thought that I should wright about this subject and my experience so far. Little steps, some forward others backward. Autocharge (moving forward “new normal”)
  10. Marcel It may be so. I however made sure it was fine to fly with them in my luggage or backpack( a simple pice of paper from the funeral home). After that when I was at that special spot on the beach or on a privet boat at sea all I did was make sure I didn't disturb the people in the area and released Her ashes. Call me what you want but I was on a mission and I wasn't going to be stopped. Autocharge
  11. Thank you ( for putting up with my wall of text and typos). Something funny/unbelievable. After 30 years of working with and on computers, I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW TO TYPE. I hunt and peck. The Navy had no interest in teaching me how to wright!!! LOL Autocharge
  12. I just posted in another thread and thought I would bring it to this thread as it's a part of my experience. To each their own. I had my wife's ashes separated into glass jars that we painted black(mason jars with the clip lids from dollar general, she would have liked that"favorite store"). Then I traveled to California ,Guam, Sicily, Florida, Gulf of Mexico to spread her ashes into the "OCEANS" at her request. Her mom even took some to the Philippines. On most of the trips I saw family members in that area as we spread her ashes into the Sea. It took 6 months to accomplish this task and it was worth it. So what you do with your ashes is for you not everyone else. Autocharge
  13. To each their own. I had my wife's ashes separated into glass jars that we painted black(mason jars with the clip lids from dollar general, she would have liked that"favorite store"). Then I traveled to California ,Guam, Sicily, Florida, Gulf of Mexico to spread her ashes into the "OCEANS" at her request. Her mom even took some to the Philippines. On most of the trips I saw family members in that area as we spread her ashes into the Sea. It took 6 months to accomplish this task and it was worth it. So what you do with your ashes is for you not everyone else. Autocharge
  14. I don't think I can find Happiness in loneliness? I just want to be Happy, is that to much to ask? So much has been taken from all of us on here. Sorry sad moment. Autocharge
  15. I'm tying to Find places to go and things to see, now that I'm retired. I'm thinking I would like to take a trip once a month (1st thought: that should do it I hope). So if any one is going anywhere and seeing some sights ( city or outdoors). Wouldn't It be nice to go and meet someone new at the same time? Now this is a post I'm not sure about . LOL Kind of floating an idea..... so to speak. Autocharge