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About Lost0404

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    Death of my husband
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  1. How do I find others stories

    Thank you I will.
  2. I lost my husband and I feel so lost

    That is so true. That's exactly what I do. I hate that my Tom is gone and I constantly think of our lives together and how I'll never have that again. I'm sure it's not very healthy to do that. Tom and I also used to say how lucky we were to of found each other. The song that we danced to at our wedding was, The broken road that led me to you, by rascal flats. If you haven't heard that one then you should listen to it. We felt like that's exactly what happened and in that instance we were glad we traveled the road we did to get to each other. I guess that's the hardest part. To start a new life with out our loved ones. We loved our lives together and it was comfortable, constant and familiar. The unknown is always scary. Especially if your traveling it kicking, screaming and wishing you had your old life back
  3. I lost my husband and I feel so lost

    Nobody1 I'm so sorry for your loss. I also have 2 dogs. One of them is a Bernice mountain dog. He was my Tom's baby. For awhile after he died my dog would get up around the time he came home from work and look out the window and cry for 5 minutes. Now he only does if he here's a diesel truck. Tom and I didn't have any children together. But I often wish we did as I still would have a piece of him with me. My prayers are with you and I hope one day soon we will feel our loved ones with us just as others say they do.
  4. I lost my husband and I feel so lost

    Thank you for reaching out to me. I wasn't sure if I was posting correctly. I am sorry for your loss as well. At 2 months in, I think I was still in shock. It seems like it's getting harder not easier. I remember thinking that people say it gets easier but all I thought is the more time that goes buy without him. Makes me miss him that much more. I don't have a lot of experience with chatting on line and have never been a part of something like this. I hope it helps to talk about my Tom with people and to listen to everyone else's stories. It seems every one feels the same way as me. I'm the youngest of 8 and None of my siblings have lost their spouse. So they really don't know how I'm feeling. I seem to keep things in. But I am a good listener
  5. It's been 6 months since I suddenly lost my husband. I know exactly how you feel. Every memory seems to just miss him more. I agree this just sucks. I miss doing all those stupid things with him. He loved watching shows about how things were made. I used to tell him it was filling my brain with useless knowledge. I would do anything to watch one of those shows with now. I found a voicemail after he died that he left me. I am so great full for that. I play it all the time. It's his voice telling me he loves me and he will talk to me later. I hope the time comes soon for all of us to remember our loved ones and it puts a smile on our face instead of tears on our face
  6. How do I find others stories

    For the past week I've been reading tishagun's story and posts. But now that I joined I can't seem to find any of the stories people have shared about loosing their husband
  7. For the last week I have been reading everyone's stories. Tonight I finally signed up. I am a quiet person unless I get to know you. But reading tishagun story sounds like mine. I lost my husband 6 months ago. He died very suddenly. He had a cat scan and died an hour later. He was my everything. I feel so lost and week. He was my second husband. I thought I had finally found the man I was going to grow old with. We were together all the time unless we were at work. I hate being here with out him. I don't know how to live without him nor do I want to. I have to sell my house, camper, and car. I have to find a new place to live. I have only worked part time and now I have to look for a full time job. He was the financial provider. I have to start selling his tools, the house and a lot of his things. I feel like I'm erasing my life with him. I will only have pictures and my memories. I want him back so bad. I didn't get to say goodbye to him. I can't feel him around me. People always say they feel their loved ones are still with them. Well I feel like my Tom died and is not with me. Everyone tells me that I should cherish the time I spent with him. I can't it just makes me miss him more. In a way I wish I never met him because than I wouldn't hurt so bad. In his last moments I had to go out of the room to speak to his nurse. Then he was being held down and I didn't want to see that so I was waiting until he settled down. Well his heart stopped and they couldn't bring him back. I fee like he didn't fight to come back to me. Does he think I left him? I wish I knew those were his last moments, I would have stayed by his side. I just wanted them to help him and I didn't want to be in the way. He was everything to me. He treated me like a princess. He was my best friend. I don't have many friends and at work I'm the only one in the office. So all I do is think of him. He used come have lunch with me and we talked through out the day. I always told him how lucky I was to have found him. They say things happen for a reason, than what's the reason. There is nothing to live for nothing to look forward to. If It was a guarantee that if I died I'd see him than I would. When will it start to be better? I can't imagine it ever getting better. Please, if anyone has any suggestions on how to go on please tell me.