hoosier guy

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About hoosier guy

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    Advanced Member

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  • Gender
  • Location
    martinsville indiana
  • Interests
    stone masonry , motorcycle trikes , honey bees , engines
  • Loss Type
    son murdered


  • Occupation
    self employed stone mason
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  1. its obvious that im not going to get much of a rise out of you people so lets try this ; do you know what you call an athiest in a casket ? a MF all dressed up with nowhere to go , thats what .
  2. well another difficult and sad day . im thankful for the distraction of work each day . i have to put one foot in front of the other and try to placate these sad and angry walls in the house jake and i built . i guess this weekend ill can up a bunch of beef . if canned properly it can last for years in the jars . maybe some day nick and i can connect over the delicious beef and its back story . itll be a story of incredible loss but one of getting back up and making something constructive out of the debris . maybe we can offer beef and noodles to my sons killer just before they stick a needle in his arm . maybe these walls are getting all of this " angry " from me . oh well . the mind wanders . i do realize now that jake would want nick under my arm . my close cousin killed himself at the age of 34 . i was 33 at the time . cuz was a male hor and theres no watering that down . about ten years after cuz killed himself , jake and i were sitting in a docs office across from a woman who i knew cuz had had a fling with just before his death . sitting beside her was a ten year old version of my cousin . his dark eyes were blazing holes thru jake and i . hed evidently been enlightened by his mother as to who we were . my thoughts were of the nutcase preachers from my childhood who would go on for hours about how " ye must be BORNED agin ' . sorry , but thats how the trogs pronounced it . lol i sat looking at my cuz in his ten year old form and wondered " could that questionable scripture have just been implying that you may indeed simply be BORN AGAIN ? ( as in genetically reincarnated ) . nobody ever promised me anything . nicks all ive got and id be an ungrateful fool not to be thankful for that and to boldly step up to the task of helping to guide him . my biggest problem is , on one shoulder i have a little demon giving me horrible advice . on the other shoulder is another demon strongly reiterating what the first one said . so theres balance but not in a cut and dried good vs evil way . were going to do something stupid but just how stupid will come after much deliberation between nick and i . eh , just funnin you people . its what i do when i get bored or the level of blood in my vodka stream gets too low .
  3. dee, 24 hours in jail can seem like a lifetime . these young mugs in question are probably there on probation violations . you do not bail out from that . its one of the rare circumstances where you can be held almost indefinately . the unanswered replies to your desperate inquiries are a tactic only meant to further disorient a person . theres even piped in 'white ' noise to tamper with your mood cycles . american justice is fascinating to say the least . ive been on probation before . if you work hard and pay your user fees you seemingly cant do any wrong . if you come to a probation meeting with a hard luck story instead of money , youre priorities blow and youre in for a long hard way to go . your punishment is financial and that makes much more sense than letting a person rot in jail , further alienating themselves from the workforce . ive been on probation twice in the last 5 years for relatively minor dumbassedness . i actually developed good relations with the officers and would joke with them that dollar per dollar probation is cheaper than therapy so lets do this sht . lol
  4. and leslie, if you learn to hate your ex on a " molecular " level it becomes so much simpler . you no longer have to ruminate each time about the various reasons you despise them . its just .that . particular . configuration . of cells .. lol i sent our detective a particularily horrible , vile joke a few days ago . it aint one youd tell to your bible study group , ill put it that way . you never know how it will be received but in this case he said it was the funniest final punch line hes heard in many years . if anybody wants to hear the horrid joke just PM me . its pretty dam funny and sometimes i feel like a little humor is the only thing keeping me alive right now .
  5. leslie, again , love your quote . " life is about accepting limitations " . im not " maturities " poster boy but ive always loved this poster that i printed off years ago . " the self esteem of maturity is neither grandiose nor omnipotent is but accompanied by an awareness of our own human limitations and frailties " . i almost have to kneecap my detective to get anything out of him ( understandably so ) . however ive always thought that his plans to lock up a bunch of people who he feels were in the know about jakes murder , was just him trying to placate me . NOPE .. he told me today that hes got half of our jail full of people who are guaranteed to talk when theyve had all the block walls that they can stand . ive been reading a lot about police interviews and interrogations . once they get their hands on you you dont have a chance . its all phsycological and has 300 years of experience behind it . they may speed up and at other times slow down your wall clock . might plant a detective right in your cell posing as an inmate . definately allowed to deceive you about what they know . at present i think that young nicks parents arent as suspect as the broke , cracked out neighbors and their visitors who , it has been proven are no strangers to armed robbing individuals for money or drugs . i hope his ends in a jury trial . mitigating factors in this county would only make the jury madder .
  6. leslie , im 58 yrs old and at this age there are few things that you still derive enjoyment from as you once did . i dont know what will ever pick me back up . everything jake and i have ever built was meant to go to jake to compensate him for his honest loyalty to me when our family divorced in 2001 . if young nick doesnt step into the void left by his father ( jake ) this home and contents , vehicles , trikes , will be torched to the ground when my vitality fades away . i know of no one in my life who has worked so hard and deserving of this home and assorted creations . nothing against my older son , this just wasnt his project and he has no stake in it , nor would appreciate it . in fact at the age of 17 , the older son conspired with the ex to drive me out of the first home id built for them . no grudge here but the fact is when you lie in order to destroy , there usually isnt a pot of gold waiting at the end of your rainbow of selfish delusion . thats the very definition of INjustice ..
  7. well my oldest son just sent me a pretty kind email so i guess i should stop harshin on him . his ex in florida has poisoned his young kids against him and its pretty heart wrenching for him . the absence of those grandkids in my ( and his ) life was brought up in court by our attorney so that might help sway the judge to give nick our surname . dna results say hes a s****y . like abe lincoln said ; calling a dogs tail a leg does not make it a leg . admittedly , i dont know much about the law except you dont jam your trike thru marion indiana at 1 ; 00 am washing down xanax with everclear . judge haas gets all frowney faced over that sht . #fatheroftheyear
  8. @ leslie , " We all have to concentrate on fixing ourselves because that is the only person we can change " . thanks , that really helped me today . honestly , i have no one . although i dont go on about the loss of my son much , ive still found people tend to avoid me ( im assuming ) just because the situation is potentially so emotionally charged . my life seems so meaningless right now so its going to be up to me to fix it . my oldest son and i still dont give two shts for each other and that right there is giving me the incentive to thrive . two kids can grow up to be so different . i guess thats why we have two arms . you can hug one while punching the other in his smug face .. hehe
  9. this is a morgan county indiana story that i think is fun enough to share with you people . a few years ago jake and i were driving our 51 chevy worktruck home thru town one night but our clutch throwout bearing had taken a sht . so you effectively have no clutch pedal . you have to kill the engine at each stoplight , then take off in granny gear with the starter and bangshift all the gears . i no sooner ' launched ' from a stoplight when a deputy pulled me over . he jumped up on my running board and screamed " whats yer fn BAG man ? i had to laugh being it was timeless morgan county lingo that he used on us . i showed him the boxes of new parts sitting on our console and told him we were " precisely " heading home to fix the issue . he was SO cool . hes our sheriff now . jake , on the other hand , was sitting in the passenger seat holding a half pound of weed . for his own use , mind you . he never sold drugs . me and future sheriff were posturing and just having some good clean banter . jake didnt think either of us were a GD bit funny ..
  10. stephen judy went from his murder of a mooresville woman and her 3 kids to death in michigan citys electric chair in only 23 months . i think he refused appeals in order to be found insane . it didnt work for him . we fried tim mcvey in short order too but in all fairness it was a federal sentence carried out in terre haute . my son was known and loved . he fixed peoples automobiles , on the breakdown sight often , treated the customers like hed want to be treated and a deluge of citizens have spoken to the detectives , stating that they would be walking right now if jake hadnt of went the extra mileage to help them . if jakes murder trial is tried by a jury , somebody is going to fry . i would prefer the death penalty because it usually represents 20 + years on a very stark death row and several false alarms ( just for the purpose of phsyc torture ) . on the other hand , some people get a hustle going in prison and , compared to living on the freezing streets , actually adapt to prison life and THRIVE . not necessarily being melodramatic here . my son was ambushed at his own home and methodically assassinated . imo , and the hoosier spirit , they dont make enough mitigating circumstances to soften that up . i know this sht is a done deal . our detectives are brilliant -- decades of combined service . they just understandably wont share much info with a mad dad whos building his own electric chair . hahaha . they assume im kidding but deep inside they dont have any problem visualizing said chair . they are old morgan county rural boys and arent strangers to mechanical innovation themselves .
  11. i just found out that our next " surname change " hearing isnt slotted until july 7 . i dont really believe our courts are that busy . i think theyre trying to wear a couple of murder suspects down . my county boasts an over 90 % conviction rate for murders and have a ( imo ) world class cold case team . i was reading stories a few days ago about capital punishment in indiana . the author said that bloomington indiana is such a liberal craphole that capital punishment is unheard of in that town . come 15 miles north to morgan county indiana and we have a healthy reputation for cramming a needle in a killers arm . tommy pruitt is next . he has an iq of about 60 but he was well aware of what .45 caliber bullets would do to the beloved lawman he murdered .
  12. my ex has tried to be the hero and paint me as uncooperative , uncaring and uncouth . woops . she has remarried and no longer has a stake in our surname . guess whos driveway she had to traverse monday evening to beg for my help lest her case be tossed out of the courtroom .. old " cappy " played the hardass too . sent her on her way with no promise . i showed up for jake and nick , and maybe that cuteassed attorney .. life hurls sht on a steady basis but usually from one or two specific directions . i hurl in a 360 and everybody gets a face full .. ive been self employed for years and if you dont have guts you get trampled .
  13. abandonment is about as tolerated as punching a judge in the face . i think you'll win this laurie . our justice system drives you nuts sometimes with their deafening silence but i still have great faith in them .
  14. i SO lied under oath . i told the court that i have no animosity towards the r***** . the judge knows what i was up to -- good copping the person who can bust this premeditated assassination wide open .
  15. ex failed a urine screen ( weed ) . i told the girl attorney that anyone dealing with what ex and i are dealing with would probably find themselves self medicating too . the atty agreed that she had been there ( her mothers death ) and did exactly that . we are just humans , not supermen and women .