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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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    • ModKonnie

      Advertisements   09/05/2017

      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie

Blueeyedprof

Members
  • Content count

    2
  • Joined

  • Last visited

About Blueeyedprof

  • Rank
    Newbie

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Texas
  • Interests
    Guitar, bicycles, kayaking, reading, being outside
  • Loss Type
    Divorce

Converted

  • Occupation
    Professor
  • First Name
    Stephen
  • Zip
    78412
  1. New normal?

    I was divorced in July of this year. I was awarded what's called extended standard possession of my children. This means 4 nights every other week and every Thursday. The ex wife keeps talking about coparenting but it's hard for me to see this when I have limited time to be a parent. It's further complicated by her telling the children I am sleeping with the nanny I hired to watch them while I work (I'm not and wouldn't sleep with her, and she's watched them three times since the divorce), the ex has also told the children I was abusive and tried to get them to say I was abusive. She hit my son when he didn't agree and now I'm back in court fighting for him. Then her idea of coparenting is to have me do all her running around it doesn't include time with the children. I know I've done wrong, but to be accused of things I've never done, and then to learn of her doing those very things is killing me. I spend a lot of time alone wishing for something to happen. I'm told I should go out, but to where? I don't do bars or clubs. I don't have any extra money for a gym (but who wants to meet someone at the gym) it feels wrong to go to church to meet people. I am there to worship. I just feel lost and alone. My new normal is miserable.
  2. Custody and divorce

    I was married for 13 years. I was divorced in July. I've had some help from a guy who literally found me smoking on the stairs to my new apartment. He made me dinner and took me to baseball games. Said he's been there and just wants to help others out. The pain hasn't stopped. But it has eased. He told me several things that helped. One was that you will always be your child's father. He drove 18 hours every other weekend to spend a night and a day with his children. They call him daddy still and have never left him in their hearts. The other thing he said was that girls will behave like their dad and that's why it's important for us to be honorable men. Even when our time is so limited. I don't know if this helps. I'm not sure it has helped me yet, but I keep thinking about it.
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