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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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    • ModKonnie

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      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie

KayC

Members
  • Content count

    3,211
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6 Followers

About KayC

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  • Birthday October 7

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Oregon
  • Interests
    Making cards, singing, hiking
  • Loss Type
    Husband
  • Angel Date
    06/19/2005

Converted

  • Occupation
    Retired Bookkeeper & Office Manager
  • First Name
    Kay
  • Zip
    97463
  1. Don't know what to say

    I'm sorry, I know it's hard, I hit our four months after he died. I couldn't carry out the plans I'd made.
  2. Don't know what to say

    Tineke, I don't think this ever ends. It IS hard. It's not about whether it's hard or not, it's how we do it, and that's going to be different for each of us. I don't think I'm going through a rough patch, no rougher than the last 12 years, the fact is, it does hit us sometimes, no matter how long it's been, and we deal with it...we have no choice. Azipod, I wish there were something I could say to help you through this. I'm glad I believe in God, it makes it easier. To those who don't, I just tell them to keep their minds open for what might be. It helps to look at the universes, the stars, the galaxies, so many videos out on that...I like to look at them and wonder where he is, he's somewhere. I will be with him again.
  3. Two Months...

    LoveGoli, I'm sorry your friends aren't there for you. I think we have to teach people what we need from them, how to respond, but of course this comes when we can least feel up to it. I wish they would enclose this as a funeral insert...http://emilyrlong.com/how-to-support-someone-who-is-grieving/
  4. Does anyone else feel this?

    @4191314Welcome here...perhaps when you're ready you can tell us a little more...who you lost, when, something about you. I'm sorry for your reason for being here.
  5. I had George cremated and spread his ashes in our back yard, in front of our forest. He loved it here so I thought he'd like to have his resting place here, we spent a lot of time looking out over the back yard, watching the deer and hummingbirds come.
  6. Lost of my husband best friend

    I feel the same way as KMB does, I hope you can find a way to go easier on yourself.
  7. Sick with grief and guilt

    When you feel more able, I would let your cat sitter know. It sounds like she was very much a part of your cat's life. I, too, think it peculiar that the vet didn't respond.
  8. My heart is gone

    Mom2simba, I lost my husband 12 years ago...we were more than just another married couple, we were soulmates, best friends, the love of each other's life, and I couldn't imagine living without him. Since then I've lost a dog and several cats. My animals have always been part of my family, they aren't "just a pet", they are everything to me. It's hard, but you will get through this, the intensity of the pain will eventually lessen and hopefully one day you can help your kids pick out another cat. Right now though it probably seems too hard for you, but I hope you'll leave your heart open for the future. Your cat lived a long time, you gave him a good life, and I'm sure he is grateful. I believe wholeheartedly that our pets go to heaven and we'll be together again. Heaven is a place where there is no more pain, no tears, the perfect utopia. No more bodies aging. We get a new body and time is no more...what could be more wonderful than that!
  9. horrible guilt and shame

    I wish this place had a "like" button! There is healing, but it's not an end, but rather a process. We continue missing them, even as we adjust to what their absence means to our lives. It's tough but we make it through this, together.
  10. My heart is gone

    (Doulbe posted) Mom2simba, I lost my husband 12 years ago...we were more than just another married couple, we were soulmates, best friends, the love of each other's life, and I couldn't imagine living without him. Since then I've lost a dog and several cats. My animals have always been part of my family, they aren't "just a pet", they are everything to me. It's hard, but you will get through this, the intensity of the pain will eventually lessen and hopefully one day you can help your kids pick out another cat. Right now though it probably seems too hard for you, but I hope you'll leave your heart open for the future. Your cat lived a long time, you gave him a good life, and I'm sure he is grateful. I believe wholeheartedly that our pets go to heaven and we'll be together again. Heaven is a place where there is no more pain, no tears, the perfect utopia. No more bodies aging. We get a new body and time is no more...what could be more wonderful than that!
  11. When will it end

    We'll be here as you go through this. Yes, it brings great comfort knowing we'll be together again.
  12. This morning I wept

    Well the Bible does say no man knows the day or the hour so I don't pay attention when people say the world will end such and such day. But it does look like the signs of the times! So many affected, Puerto Rico, Dominican Republic, Cuba, US, Mexico, but even clear across the world things are happening, and of course all the "rumors of war" with N. Korea. Politics aside, my heart goes out to the individual people that are suffering loss...not just loss of home, although that in itself is hard enough, but especially loss of family members. Thank you both for your responses. I guess we can only pray for the victims and donate to the relief funds.
  13. ''What Dreams May Come'' by Richard Matheson

    I can't do streaming and don't belong to Netflix so no way to rent it, but maybe it'll be on t.v. one of these days. It does look good. I've often wondered the same thing about my dog...if there was such a thing as a soulmate in a dog, he would be it. It's going to be super hard to lose him one of these days.
  14. This morning I wept

    We are bombarded on every side by news of hurricanes and earthquakes...Harvey, Irma, Maria, so much more. This morning as I read the newspaper of the earthquake in Mexico, of little children buried in rubble, some alive, waiting to be rescued, only to have time run out...it broke my heart. God, why??? There is no answer. Someone's life was forever changed. A man getting his baby baptized, only to lose his infant and his whole family. People waiting outside a schoolhouse reduced to rubble, only to learn their child never made it out. How do we deal with so much devastation? It's everywhere, all around the world, but lately, it's hit so close to home...to some, it's hit their neighborhood. Waiting for news from friends that live in TX, FL, GA, TN...this is so hard. We remember our own day of loss, we know all too well what it feels like.
  15. Two Months...

    LoveGoli, I'm sorry you are missing him going through all of the festivities with you... In the 1800s people dressed in black the first year...it was a reminder to others that they were in mourning. Some never returned to bright colors, choosing instead to wear somber greys, an outside reminder of what they felt from within. People no longer hold to those traditions. Our society has somehow lost the idea of mourning, yet for us this has happened to, it is very much within our souls. Of course you don't see that this will ever ease up, yet we do adjust somewhat...not completely, we are never the same again. Just as a wound festers and eventually heals, so do we, but we are left with scars and not only that, it affects how we are. I feel for all of you still in those early stages where you wake up to get hit with all of this rude awakening all over again. For me I have long since quit expecting him to be here. I know he's not going to call, I know he's not walking through that door, I know I'm sleeping alone. What is worse, the rude awakenings, being repeated shocked, or actually adjusting to this change...having adjusted is easier on us in one sense, but incomprehensible in another sense.
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