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Online Grief Support, Help for Coping with Loss | Beyond Indigo Forums
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    • ModKonnie

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      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie

Lisa k

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About Lisa k

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  • Birthday 03/23/1974

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Australia
  • Loss Type
    Mother
  • Angel Date
    14th July 2015

Recent Profile Visitors

1,116 profile views
  1. Hi silver, it seems nothing much has changed with your father. Are you able to get any sort of break from it all ?. Being a carer is hard enough without all the uncooperative behavior on top. It's been good to hear from you and catch up.
  2. Hi silverkitties, it's been a long time since you've been here. Should I ask how things are with your father?. 3 years still isn't all that long. It was two years July 14 since my mum passed. To say this year has been a rollercoaster is an understatement. I've completed six months of chemo, I've had a mastectomy, and right now I'm doing radiation. There have been so many days I've cried and begged my mum to come get me. I have wished to be where she is. So many days I've wished I could die of this shitty disease. I've missed her so much more this year, and still here I am breathing. They say time heals, but the emptiness, the big void that will never be filled remains. I hope you are well silver and find a little peace. Lisa
  3. Loss changes you

    I totally agree with all you've said. Two years on I still feel this way. I hate my life without my mother.
  4. Missionblue, it's lovely to hear from you. I do hope your vertigo gets better as it sounds very unpleasant. Glad to hear Ernesto is still with you too, I hate to think of you all alone by yourself in your house. We will never stop missing our mum's and dads I guess it gets easier the more time that passes by. I hope you can sort everything with the house on time, I know it's a huge task. I would have the same problem of I were to sell as now it's a third generation home, lot's of stuff collected over many years. Please drop by when you can and tell us how you are doing. Reader, how are you feeling these days about your home?. I know everyday is a constant reminder when you and your dad lived together. Personally for me although sad at times remembering the last week's and days,it is also comforting in the sense I feel closer to my mum. Keep smiling, you are a special person. Hugs Lisa.
  5. Reader and May, you are both such sweet ,kind people. It is what it is with my dad. What you never had you don't miss. Glad i made you laugh May, sometimes that's what we need . Reader , your dad was so lucky to have you and he'd be proud of you. Always here to support people and offer kind words. I hope you find some peace eventually . Hugs Lisa
  6. Dear Reader and May, thanks for your kind words. May, my father has never cared about us and we never hear from him despite the fact he lives about a half hour drive away. He doesn't even know my mum has passed much less would he care. Oh well you can't choose your family but lucky we were blessed with such a loving mother. The only reason I know where he lives is because every couple of years I check the white pages lol. I hope your able to get a new computer soon May just so it makes your life easier. Anyone know how Missionblue is doing?. I suspect she is busy with her house still. Love and hugs Lisa
  7. Dear Reader and May, Tuesday the 11th July is my last chemo ( yay). It's been a long six months. I'm meeting with my surgeon this week . Mastectomy with be only option as chemo hasn't shrunk the mass enough. I'm petrified by the thought of surgery as I've never had an operation before. After surgery and healing time I still have radiation treatment to go which is everyday for 5 weeks. So still a way to go yet. It's been so hard and I've cried lots of tears throughout this ordeal, mostly wishing I had my mum beside me for comfort. Just last week I came down with a fever that nearly hit 38 degrees. I would've had to gone to hospital if it hit the 38 as being on chemo risk of infection is high. It went down luckily. My brother hasn't made it easy by being so unhygenic. Nothing much has changed there lol. I'm not looking forward to being lopsided in the boob department but there are prosthetics that can be used. I really don't think I want reconstructive surgery as too scary and more to put your body through. Anyway it's a two year wait in our public health system so plenty of time to think about it. For some reason I'm not getting notifications from this site and I've checked the settings. Anyone else having this problem. It's been good catching up with you all and I hope you are doing well. Big hugs Lisa xo
  8. Hi friends, hope your all doing well , I think of you all often. Big hugs to all of you. Lisa xo
  9. Something that helps me

    This is a lovely quote, it was actually read out at my grandmothers funeral back in 1999 . Just reading this now brings tears to my eyes as I think of my mother . I miss her so much still with every beat of my heart.
  10. DDT, I'm so glad you have your family with you . Even though we know the inevitable is coming, nothing prepares us for that moment. I still remember the exact moment myself and no words or anything gave me comfort . That numbness is terrible like a vital piece of you has been ripped out. I wish there was something i could say to make it better, but please know we are here anytime you need to talk. My thoughts are with you Lisa
  11. DDT, I'm so very sorry for your loss, do you have anyone with you?. It's so very devastating the feeling.
  12. Aww, thanks Missionblue. Can't say I see the resemblance lol. Wishing you all the best for the sale of your home. Keep us posted on how you go. Hugs Lisa.
  13. Missionblue, I also loved Anne of green gables as a child, so maybe I will watch the newer version. This last week i've been in bed so bad is the fatigue from this new chemo combination. Omg I've never felt worse in my life. It's horrendous all of it, plus being thrown into menopause as well. My breast cancer is oestrogen positive so I get a monthly injection of a drug called zoladex to shut down my ovaries. Hate all the drugs I've been given. After treatment and surgery I then have to take tamoxifen which I read is a carcinogenic, go figure. How is the house coming along?. I know you say you hurt your knee so I'm hoping it's better for you. I still read all the posts everyday. It's so good to hear from you. This is before chemo and now lol.
  14. Andy 75, I'm so sorry for the loss of your dear mum. Grief is so hard and we go through different stages over and over again, feeling numb is completely normal in response to losing someone so close to us. Really there are no words to describe the feeling. Your not going crazy, I promise you. We suddenly have to try and live without that person and all our emotions and body are in shock. Be kind to yourself and it's not your fault. Sending you strength Lisa
  15. Reader, thank you. Your father was so very lucky to have you. Be proud of yourself for doing all you did for him. We will always feel like we didn't do enough but the reality is we did the best we could most of the time. Lol Netflix is my best friend lately as i lie in bed bald as and feeling like crap. Hugs to all
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