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Specialk_ab2012

Members
  • Content count

    14
  • Joined

  • Last visited

About Specialk_ab2012

  • Rank
    Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Florida
  • Loss Type
    Little brother
  • Angel Date
    January 5, 2015

Converted

  • Last Name
    Bishop
  • First Name
    Katelyn

Recent Profile Visitors

551 profile views
  1. Missing him never stops!

    We're 3 days shy of my little brothers 8 month angelversary and 10 days shy of what should have been his 18th birthday. I feel like his birthday is going to be the worst of holidays and I'm dreading it so much. I wish we could skip over the entire month of September and just continue forward. I'm still so lost, angry, broken, and so much more. He was my only sibling and my very best friend. I wish so badly that I could just accept it for what it is and get over the hurt, but instead I feel like I live through the very first day over and over again. I don't know where to go from here or what to do. How does life get easier without one of your family links? I don't see how it's impossible!
  2. My brother and I!

  3. I'm lost without my brother.

    Sorry for the grammatical errors.
  4. I'm lost without my brother.

    I grew up in a family that wasn't rich in money, but rich in love. Don't get me wrong, none of us were hurting for anything, but we definitely didn't have the upper hand in life. Although my brother and I didn't always have the newest toys or the most popular clothes, my parents gave us one of the greatest gifts of all, the ability to love and be loved. Not a day went by that my family of 4, didn't exchange a million "I love you's." And not a single one of those were out of habit, but instead they were said because we meant it with all of our hearts. Our family is a close knit family, it's actually one of the closet that I know. And although I moved out at 18 (now 20) and moved an hour and a half away, I still visited home several times a week. My brother was my best friend, my enemy, my pain in the but, my right hand, my partner in crime, my twin, my annoying little brother, the half that makes me whole... He was everything to me. But on January 5, 2015, everything changed. I was working night shifts at the time and I was sitting in the parking lot of work when I got the call... I can still remember everything about that call. At 10:46pm, 16 weeks and 1 day ago, my mom called me and told me that my brother had been in a car accident and he "didn't make it." I was so shocked and upset and angry and confused. I couldn't believe the words that were coming through the phone, I didn't wanna believe them. My brother is my best friend, he makes our family whole, and the fact of losing my 17 year old brother and my only sibling, hurts beyond measure. I've joined this site and am writing this story, mainly to rant and let things out. I just don't know where to go from here. Everything that I thought I wanted in life, suddenly doesn't even matter. Everything in my future that was suppose to be the happiest days of my life, will now be followed with grief, because I won't have my best friend there with me enjoying the journey. I understand that he's watching over me and he's always "with me," but it's nowhere near the same as being able to touch, talk, and see him. The thought of living out the rest of my life without him, brings an indescribable ache to my chest. My brother was one of the most incredible people that I have ever met. He never left a room without making his presence known and he surely never left a frown upside down. He has the most infectious personality that I've ever came across and his outlook on life was truly amazing. My brother touched the lives of more people at the young age of 17, than some ever will in an entire life time. And as amazing as he was, his life was still cut short. Reports indicate that there were no drugs in his system, no alcohol, not texting and driving, not talking on the phone, no swerve marks, no break marks... Nothing. Nothing to indicate that a happy go lucky, popular high school football player, son, brother, friend, boyfriend... deserved this alternative. To me, his death with never be justified. Situations like these don't happen to people you know, and they damn sure don't happen to YOUR family. Situations like these are stories that you hear from a second hand source or stories that run across the news channel that make you thank God for your family and everything that you have. This wasn't suppose to happen to MY family, not to me, not to my brother... Never in a million years would I have guessed that I would be 20 years old and be forced to live out my forever without my little brother. I'm a firm believer that every loss is different. I know that there are others that may be experiencing a similar pain as I, but no one will ever truly understand my pain. No one could ever fully know my heartache, unless they could walk a mile in my shoes... And quite frankly that's impossible. You will never walk a mile in my shoes and I will never be able to walk a mile in yours. We may not understand each other's situations 100%, but I think that having the ability to share our stories and vent to one another may help heal some ache.
  5. I'm lost without my brother.

    Sorry for all of the grammatical errors.
  6. I'm lost without my brother.

    I grew up in a family that wasn't rich in money, by rich in love. Don't get me wrong, none of us were hurting for anything, but we definitely didn't have the upper hand in life. Although my brother and I didn't always have the newest toys or the most popular clothes, my parents gave us one of the greatest gifts of all, the ability to love and be loved. Not a day went by that my family of 4, didn't exchange a million "I love you's." And not a single one of those were out of habit, but instead they were said because we meant it with all of our hearts. Our family is a close knit family, it's actually one of the closet that I know. And although I moved out at 18 (now 20) and moved an hour and a half away, I still visited home several times a week. My brother was my best friend, my enemy, my pain in the but, my right hand, my partner in crime, my twin, my annoying little brother, the half that makes me whole... He was everything to me. But on January 5, 2015, everything changed. I was working night shifts at the time and I was sitting in the parking lot of work when I got the call... I can still remember everything about that call. At 10:46pm, 16 weeks and 1 day ago, my mom called me and told me that my brother had been in a car accident and he "didn't make it." I was so shocked and upset and angry and confused. I couldn't believe the words that were coming through the phone, I didn't wanna believe them. My brother is my best friend, he makes our family whole, and the fact of losing my 17 year old brother and my only sibling, hurts beyond measure. I've joined this site and am writing this story, mainly to rant and let things out. I just don't know where to go from here. Everything that I thought I wanted in life, suddenly doesn't even matter. Everything in my future that was suppose to be the happiest days of my life, will now be followed with grief, because I won't have my best friend there with me enjoying the journey. I understand that he's watching over me and he's always "with me," but it's nowhere near the same as being able to touch, talk, and see him. The thought of living out the rest of my life without him, brings an indescribable ache to my chest. My brother was one of the most incredible people that I have ever met. He never left a room without making his presence known and he surely never left a frown upside down. He has the most infectious personality that I've ever came across and his outlook on life was truly amazing. My brother touched the lives of more people at the young age of 17, than some ever will in an entire life time. And as amazing as he was, his life was still cut short. Reports indicate that were no drugs in his system, no alcohol, not texting and driving, not talking on the phone, no swerve marks, no break marks... Nothing. Nothing to indicate that a happy go lucky, popular high school football player, son, brother, friend, boyfriend... deserved this alternative. To me, his death with never be justified. Situations like these don't happen to people you know, and they damn sure don't happen to YOUR family. Situations like these are stories that you here from a second hand source or stories that run across the news channel that make you thank God for your family and everything that you have. This wasn't suppose to happen to MY family, not to me, not to my brother... Never in a million years would I have guessed that I would be 20 years old and be forced to live out my forever without my little brother. I'm a firm believer that every loss is different. I know that there are others that may be experiencing a similar pain as I, but no one will ever truly understand my pain. No one could ever fully know my heartache, unless they could walk a mile in my shoes... And quite frankly that's impossible. You will never walk a mile in my shoes and I will never be able to walk a mile in yours. We may not understand each other's situations 100%, but I think that having the ability to share our stories and vent to one another may help heal some ache.
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